


A Monster's Love: Ask Kyuubi

by Yereanth16



Series: A Monster's Love [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Advice Column, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Drama, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Asexual Character, Depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Insomnia, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:46:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 55,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29589516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yereanth16/pseuds/Yereanth16
Summary: After an accident that changed everything, Naruto created 'Ask Kyuubi' an advice blog where users send in their question and he replies under a hidden identity, when 'Shukaku' reaches out asking him what is the meaning of a monster being alive, it changes the course of both of their lives. A relationship develops between Naruto and 'Shukaku' but who is it that really needs to be saved?[Terrible at writing summaries, check out the first chapter and see if you like it!]Gaara x Naruto fanfic with past Sasuke x Naruto mentioned.Part 1 of 'A Monsters Love' collection
Relationships: Gaara/Uzumaki Naruto, Nara Shikamaru/Temari, Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Series: A Monster's Love [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2173884
Comments: 25
Kudos: 49





	1. Ch1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! So I've been having a massive writer block for my other story "Goodbye Kiss" which is Saso x Dei/ Tobi x Dei. I needed to clear my head and this story happened. As of right now I have a few chapters ready, I'll be posting weekly, depending how much I can write ahead I'll post 1 or 2 chapters a week to start off with I'll post the first 5 chapters.
> 
> This is an idea I've had for a while now but wasn't sure about, sorry in advance if Naruto seems OOC in this fanfic, I tried to stay as close as possible to everyone main personality. In this fanfic Naruto suffers from PTSD, Depression and some other mental illness which are explained throughout the story. Gaara suffers from Dissociative Personality Disorder which will be explained later on in the story. Naruto also has one prosthetic arm and is an insomniac.
> 
> This story is Male on Male, not sure yet if there will be sex involved since I kinda see Gaara as asexual but there will be kissing, hugging, past relationship that includes sex between two guys. There is also cursing, mention of self harm, talk about self harm or self destructive behaviors. 
> 
> If any of these things bother you please hit the back button because this story is not for you. If you love angsty/ depressive stories with cute moments and exploring mental illness as well as a lot of cute Naruto x Gaara moments this is the story for you. Also, expect a lot of coffee talk, Naruto and Gaara are coffee addicts lol. 
> 
> If anyone knows how to add pictures to a story please let me know T_T I made really nice logo for Naruto's blog and Gaara's signature but I don't know how to format it here. Any help will be appreciated!
> 
> Alright I am done, please enjoy and let me know what you think. Your feedback is extremely important and lets me know if I should continue posting my work or not. Apologies in advance if there is any grammatical errors, I tried to fix the ones I found but do let me know. Also, if anyone wants to send question for Naruto to answer in his column please feel free to.  
> \---------------

_**“Dear Kyuubi,** _

_**Sometimes I feel invisible, at school everyone ignores me and at home it's like I am not even there. I hate this feeling and sometimes I find myself hating all of these people around me...can you help me learn how to control this hatred?** _

_**Kind Regards,** _

_**Invisible1** _

_**\------------** _

_**Dear Invisible1,** _

_**Believe it or not, we all go through times of feeling invisible or ignored but it's how we handle it that counts! The truth is we all want to feel important and acknowledged, that is how we, as humans, can confirm to ourselves that it's okay for us to live.** _

_**Look inside your heart, is there anything that you can do to acknowledge yourself? That is the first step to take, as long as you are kind and help others, I am sure there will be someone out there who will acknowledge your existence and be grateful for it, Believe it!** _

_**I am grateful that you exist and that you reached out to me, remember...you are not alone.** _

_**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo”** _

* * *

A tan hand moved with velocity through the keyboards while the other hand grabbed a mug that had the picture of an orange fox **_“Ow...Ow...Hot!”_** A loud voice said, setting the mug back down, tongue poking out. Cerulean blue eyes tried to look at the now burned tongue but it was no use, he sighed and looked at the next letter he received.

_**“Dear Kyuubi-san** _

_**What is the purpose of a monster existing? Sometimes I think that the only reason a monster like me is still alive, is to kill and be hated. I have been following your column for many years now, you say to be kind and believe in oneself...to follow our dreams, but what if we have no dreams and are incapable of being kind? What if a monster like me can’t control those urges to kill?** _

_**A Monster who can only love itself,** _

**Shukaku** ” 

This made those Cerulean blue eyes go wide, re-reading the letter once more, wondering if it was a prank but something about it sounded desperate and mournful. 

The image of a crying blonde toddler flashed through the writer’s mind, no matter how much the blonde toddler cried, no one came to save it. After a soft sigh and another attempt to drink his milky coffee, the tanned hand began to type away once more.

_**“Dear** _ **Shukaku** _**,** _

_**Thank you for reaching out to me...first I think we need to re-define what it means to be a monster, yes? Personally, I think that a monster is simply a super-human, someone who has seen the best and worst in humanity.** _

_**I believe that fundamentally we are all good, it's just our experience that has us do things that some may consider to be ‘good’ or ‘bad’ but as long as we can accept our flaws and admit to our wrongdoing, anything can be forgiven.** _

_**Now on to the question...why does a monster exist if not for killing? Honestly, I think that’s a question whose answer is far too complex to answer carelessly.** _

_**Human nature is complex, I’d like to say that It’s**_ BECAUSE _**you are a monster and recognize it that you exist and can live...but just in case, why don’t we ask our fellow readers?**_

_**Everyone...what do**_ YOU _**think is the reason for a monster to exist?**_

_**I want you to know that no matter what, I am glad that you exist and grateful you reached out for help, thanks for being a loyal reader all this time!** _

_**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo”** _

The tanned hand finished typing, re-reading what he wrote for a moment then ran a hand through his spiky, blonde hair and smiled slightly.

“....Shukaku, huh? What an interesting writer.” Naruto murmured, posting the answers on his blog, responding to a few more letters that were sent to him. 

He had started his **_‘Ask Kyuubi!’_ ** blog almost a decade ago, at first it had been slow, not that many people reached out but after a few years more people started writing and he was able to expand. No one knew who was behind Kyuubi, it was one of the things that the blonde cherished the most, the complete anonymity between his readers and him. Naruto loves reading letters of thanks from those that he’s helped, it made him feel useful. 

Those cerulean blue eyes turned to look at the framed photograph of a young blonde grinning, next to him was a scolding raven boy and a pinkett young girl who was glancing at the raven with a fond look, in the middle was a silver hair man whose bottom half of his face was covered by a black face mask and who looked to be smiling if the squinting eyes were any indication.

Shaking his head, Naruto looked away from the picture, not wanting to think about the past _‘It’s because you’ve experienced what it's like to be a monster that you should continue living Naruto...it's okay to want to live.’_ The blonde remembered a familiar voice telling him when he was younger. 

  
  


Yes...it’s because he was a monster that it was fine for him to want to live...and keep trying to desperately interact with others.


	2. Ch2

_**“ Dear Kyuubi,** _

_**I had a fight with my friend and apologized but they said**_ “Just because you apologize doesn’t mean I have to forgive you.” _**Is that true? I always thought that apologies were meant to fix everything.**_

_**Thanks in advance,** _

_**4eversorry** _

* * *

_**Dear 4eversorry,** _

_**I think that’s a good question that you’ve asked...first, I’d like to examine some things. When you apologized...was it sincere and from the bottom of your heart? As a society, we’ve been taught to utter the words**_ ‘Thank you’ _**and ‘**_ Sorry’ _**while rarely meaning it or understanding the meaning behind it.**_

_**Being sorry is being regretful about something, depending on the case it can change. For example apologizing for bumping someone would not be the same as say...apologizing for mentally or physically harming someone which also includes a whole wide of subtypes...but that will be a topic for another time.** _

_**I supposed in short my answer would have to be** “Apologizing is understanding that we must accept the punishment that comes with it….whatever it may be, believe it!”_

_**I hope your friend and you can make up, thanks for reaching out to me!** _

_**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo”** _

Naruto let out a sigh as he finished typing, glancing once more at the framed picture and smiling sadly, a finger moving to trace the young raven’s face.

_**“....I am sorry Naruto….I can’t...there are some things I just need to do, you’d never understand.”** _ The blonde shuddered as he remembered the words uttered by the raven as his best friend turned his back to him and left.

He stood up and stretched, going toward the kitchen, he poured water on the kettle and flipped the switch then went to grab his cup of ramen from the cupboard, it was chicken flavor. Naruto waited for the water to finish boiling then poured it on the cup and waited the four minutes until it was ready, grabbing his chopstick and returning to his computer. It’s been exactly a week since he had last heard from Shukaku, he wondered how that person was. 

The blonde moved to slurp on the noodles then cursed as he burned his tongue, almost spilling his precious ramen. With a grumble he set the cup down and moved to read through some comments about what it meant to be a monster.

_**“Hiya Kyu!** _

_**I think a monster exist in order to bring fears to others….just think of the boogieman, Sandman or if you want something more realistic think of all those serial killers….creeeepy :(** _

_**-KreepedOt-** _

* * *

_**Hi Kyuubi,** _

_**I just wanted to reach out to Shukaku and tell them not to despair...honestly, a lot of times I feel like a monster, the people outside think I am weird due to the burns that cover my whole body. It’s thanks to your kindness that I’ve been able to survive for so long!** _

_**We can make a Monster club, all type of monsters welcomed no discrimination allowed!** _

_**You are not alone, Shukaku!!!!** _

_**-Burned Monster-** _

* * *

_**Dear Kyuubi & Shukaku,** _

_**I think a monster is someone who does cruel acts but does not feel remorseful about it and those are the worst type.** _

_**Shukaku….you said that you can’t control the urge to kill….does that mean you’ve killed before? If you’ve done it and don’t feel remorseful about it that makes you a terrible monster but I’d like to think...since you reached out, that you aren’t so bad.** _

_**I hope you get your answers.** _

_**-Repented Monster-”** _

Cerulean blue eyes kept reading through the rest of the comments then brightened up when he saw a familiar name.

_**“Dear Kyuubi-san and everyone,** _

_**Thank you for the response...I have been trying to understand the advice given.** _

_**Kyuubi-san, you say that humans are complex and I agree with you, as so, I have another question for you and everyone else….what**_ is _**human nature? I want to understand it….I want to feel but all that I have is an emptiness inside and an urge to kill, I feel that if I slip even once...there might be no turning back.**_

**A Monster who can only love itself,**

**Shukaku** _**”** _

The blonde re-read it once more, a frown on his face, thinking of the crying blonde child and the darkness surrounding the young blonde...yes, that was how this felt. There was no way he could leave Shukaku alone. By now the ramen had cooled down enough, he picked up his chopstick and began to eat it while thinking of how to respond.

**_“Dear Shukaku-san,_ **

**_I am glad to hear from you again, believe it! Hmm, what is human nature? I think it might be difficult to explain but I will try._ **

**_According to Oxford dictionary human nature is_** ‘the general psychological characteristics, feelings, and behavioural traits of humankind, regarded as shared by all humans.’ **_In other words, human nature comes down to how people feel, think and act, the so-called essence of what makes us who we are._**

**_In my humble opinion, I think human nature can be defined by our experience and explains how we may view the world. An example would be of someone that was an orphan since birth vs someone who had a family but lost it, the way they view the world will be vastly different especially when it comes toward loss._ **

**_But I think this is another question left to the other readers, Yes? Everyone...how would you define human nature?_ **

**_Thank you for reaching out to me again Shukaku...I look forward to hearing from you again, believe it!_ **

**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo”**

* * *

Naruto slurped loudly on his ramen, listening to the sound of rain on his roof and looked outside, the sky was grey and looked depressive, he turned to re-read what he had written before clicking send and sighing out, wondering if what he had written was enough then stared down at his prosthetic hand.

**_‘Human nature is complicated, Naruto...but it’s also vastly beautiful. I promise you that if you follow me I’ll show you the beauty of it even in the darkest of time.’_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised ch2 of 5 for the first day! I hope you guys are enjoying it, please do let me know your thoughts, all feedback and comments are highly appreciated.


	3. ch3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shukaku and Naruto talk for the first time.

_**“Dear Kyuubi,** _

_**I think my S.O is cheating on me and no longer finds me attractive. We’ve been together for many years now. Lately they’ve been spending a lot of late nights out, we also no longer go on dates...and I can’t remember the last time they told me that they love me too.** _

_**I used to be called beautiful during my youth but as age comes...it seems beauty fades. I’ve been thinking about getting some surgery done, perhaps then they’ll love me again.** _

_**Help me,** _

_**-Forgotten Partner-** _

* * *

_**Dear Forgotten Partner,** _

_**I think that your S.O and you need to sit down and have a serious conversation on what you are both feeling. Love should not be something shallow that disappears with physical beauty.** _

_**Perhaps it’s time to remind each other why you fell in love. Have you asked them why they’ve been coming back so late...and do you trust them?** _

_**On the topic of plastic surgery...will it bring true happiness to you? Only you can make that decision.** _

_**I hope that things work out with your S.O, please do let me know and thank you for reaching out to me, believe it!** _

**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo** _**”** _

This past week had been...overwhelming to say the least. The response to Shukaku’s question was amazing, everything from videos to even requests for Kyuubi and Shukaku to go and see for themselves what is human nature. It ranged from them visiting a kindergarten classroom to Shukaku going to work with someone and even a meeting between a couple who were divorcing.

Naruto has been thinking about what to do, the whole point of this blog had been to silently help others while staying anonymous...but he had to admit that he was curious. Hardening his resolve he looked through his personal archive where he kept the contact information that his members put in case they wanted to be contacted.

_“Dear Shukaku,_

_How are you doing? I hope all is going well, believe it! I am unsure if you’ve seen the responses on the comment session to your question. Some of the other readers have been reaching out, offering to show you by experience what are some human natures...if you are interested I thought we could try to go to some...there are some by videochat if you’d prefer as well._

_I understand wanting to remain anonymous...if you’d like to go but don’t want to reveal your identity to them and myself, we could perhaps wear a disguise? Just a thought._

_Errm...I truly do hope I am not bothering you, looking forward to hearing from you again._

**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo** _”_

The blonde spent the rest of the day waiting for a response as he cleaned his house and went about doing his daily chores.

Naruto heard his phone ring, knowing who it was by the ringtone “Hello Sakura-chan, how are you?” He brightly asked, going to make his coffee.

“Hey Naru...I am alright, same old same old, you know? How are you? I’ve not heard from you in a few weeks and was starting to get worried. Have you been going to your sessions? It’s not good to stay hidden away in that house! I am worried about you...I really am.” His best friend replied, sounding worried.

“I am doing great Sakura-chan, promise! Yes, I’ve been going to the sessions...and doing my exercise and running daily. Sorry I haven’t called you in a while just busy with work but that’s not an excuse. How are things at the hospital? Remember to take your breaks and have some days off!” The blonde exclaimed, feeling guilty for making his best friend feel worried. 

“Things are hectic as always, I am actually on my break right now...remember, if anything starts hurting too much or if you feel unwell reach out to me ASAP, okay?” There were some background noises coming from Sakura’s phone, it sounded as if someone was shouting something to her.

“I will, promise. Hey Sakura before you go... _how is he_?” The tan male’s voice softened, feeling an ache in his chest.

“...No improvement, I am sorry Naruto.” There was so much pain hidden behind those words, a type of pain that only those that went through it together could understand.

“So am I Sakura...so am I.” After Sakura hung up he finished making his coffee with a dazed look on his face. _‘Apologizing is accepting whatever punishment gets given to you...but why must this punishment be so cruel?’_ The blonde thought, shaking his head. There was no point in feeling down! 

Naruto got his response from Shukaku the next day, he had been checking his email like he did every morning after his run. 

_“Dear Kyuubi-san,_

_I am well, thank you and yourself? Yes, I have seen the responses thank you for letting me know._

_I can attend those that are located in Floret, NY or are online please let me know which works best for you._

_Kind Regards,_

**Shukaku**.”

Naruto grinned, thinking about meeting Shukaku finally. He quickly checked his schedules and the different requests then made a list of the ones closest to Shukaku and the ones online.

_“Dear Shukaku,_

_What a coincidence, I live near Floret just a twenty minute drive! I’ve gone through the different requests. There are 2 events next week Friday and Saturday in Floret. The Friday one is for the kindergarten request and comes from a mother who says her child is called a monster, there is meant to be a school event. She’d like it if we could go so that we can see a mother’s love but also how hurtful people's ignorance can be. Saturday’s event is a divorce meeting then there are a few ones through video chats._

_I am looking forward to meeting you!_

_Feel free to contact me at 633-018-8274 before the events, I tend to be up late into the night._

**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo** _”_

A few hours later Naruto was getting a phone call, he stared at the unknown number but saw the code, a funny feeling in his stomach as he picked up “Hello...is this Shukaku-san?” He brightly asked.

“Yes...is this Kyuubi-san?” Naruto was surprised by the deep and hoarse voice he heard, but it was not unpleasant.

“Yes! I am glad to have a chance to speak with you, Shukaku-san! Thank you so much for following me for so long, I truly appreciate it, believe it! I am unsure how you want to do this but I can either pick you up somewhere or we can meet close to the events, either is fine by me.” The blonde could barely keep still, tapping on his desk.

“...We can meet close to the event.” Was the answer Naruto was given. Shukaku reminded the blonde of one of his best friends, there was a certain calmness in the aloof way that the other male talked.

“Okay! I was thinking about making some masks for the Friday event so that the children could have some fun...maybe animal themes. Is the Racoon your favorite animal? I noticed that it's in your signature!”Naruto was already warming up to Shukaku and they’ve barely talked...it was a flaw that the blonde had.

“...Favorite animal? I do not know.” Shukaku replied, almost quietly then went silent. 

Luckily the blonde was used to being around quiet people and filling in the silence. “I think Racoons are quite cute, at least the baby ones but when they are adults they are not as cute...quite greedy honestly. I used to see them often when I was younger but not so much here.” Okay, this was more of him nervously ranting instead of filling in the silence. “Errmmm...Hello? Sorry, am I talking too much? I tend to do it when I am nervous, just tell me to shut up if its annoying and I will...also doesn’t help I drank 4 cups of black coffee instead of 2 today, can you get high on coffee? I think I might be high on coffee.” The blonde heard a snorting sound and grinned.

“You are fine, Kyuubi-san...I am unused to conversing with others.” The quiet, deep voice replied.

“Oh then you’ll fit right in with me, I never shut up! Sasuke used to call me an idiot and tell me to shut...up.” Cerulean eyes saddened at the thought of his best friend, shaking his head and reminding himself that there was no point in being sad. “Anyways, my closest friends ironically are the reserved and quiet type. My other friend, Shikamuru...he’s a freaking genius but like the laziest person I’ve ever met, not like me, I am pretty stupid.” 

“I do not think you are stupid, Kyuubi-san. You saved me.” It was very blunt and firm, making Naruto feel a warmth spread through his body as he blushed brightly.

How could Shukaku say that so easily without a hint of embarrassment? Naruto was quiet for a moment then smiled brightly “Thank you, Shukaku-san, I truly appreciate it, believe it!” Then he thought about something “Are you perhaps Japanese since you keep using Japanese honorifics?” 

“...Euroasian.” Shukaku quietly replied.

“Really?! So am I...well partially from what I was told.” Naruto brightly replied “My father was Russian and Japanese, my mother was Japanese.”Why was he telling this stranger something so private? Naruto was not one to talk about his parents but it felt as if Shukaku and him have known each other for a long time.

After a minute or so of silence, Naruto heard the deep voice once again “Hm.” It was enough for the blonde who smiled brightly and laughed.

“If you ever want to talk or reach me feel free to contact me on this phone, I always have it near me!” Naruto happily offered, trying to imagine Shukaku, probably someone much older by the way that the reserved man acted and sounded.

“Very well, I shall see you Friday...thank you, Kyuubi-san.” With that the reserved man hung up the phone.

Naruto stared at his phone, then hung up as well and rested a hand on his chest, feeling his heart speed up with excitement. He couldn’t wait for friday!

_**‘Just give this world another chance, Naruto...I promise that you’ll find your purpose as well...I promise kiddo.’** _

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ch3 of 5 for the first day, enjoy! Floret, NY is a place I made up, also when Naruto mentions the Racoon in the signature it has to do with the original signature I had included into the story. Once I figure out how to add images to a story I'll come back and fix it.


	4. ch4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shukaku and Naruto meet face to face for the first time and have a nice chat.

Naruto drove toward Willow Road, Willowry Elementary School. He hummed to the J-rock blasting in his car, **L’arc en Ciel** always made him want to dance. He parked five blocks away from the school which was where Shukaku had agreed to meet him.

The young man was dressed in an orange with black jacket which had a swirling design in the back which was black, he also had on a long sleeve orange shirt underneath and black trousers, finishing it off with orange boots and had tried controlling his unruly blonde spiky hair to no veil, it had a mind of its own.

Naruto got out of his neon orange with black mini-cooper, it was obvious which was his favorite color. He looked around and checked his message, having told Shukaku that he would be driving a bright mini-cooper, hard to miss. He had arrived fifteen minutes early from their agreed time to meet up and almost an hour early to the event

The blonde waited for a few minutes, checking his phone then saw a redhead figure approach him. The young man that was fast approaching him had dark sunglasses with spiky, crimson hair that made Naruto think of blood. He was dressed in a crimson jacket with grey trousers and what looked to be a brown gourd and...was that a tattoo on the young man’s forehead?! Wow that was daring.

The gourd made him think of Shukaku’s avatar, there was no way that this young man was Shukaku...he was expecting an old man!

**“S-Shukaku-san?!”** Naruto asked surprised, cerulean blue eyes widening. He saw the redhead falter for a moment before stopping in front of him.

“Kyuubi-san?” The familiar deep voice asked.

Naruto smiled brightly, tempted to hug the smaller male but stopped himself. “Hai! Nice to officially meet you, believe it!” The tanned male offered his hand, from the bit of skin he could see, he could tell that the redhead was quite pale...and seemed to have no eyebrows. What the cerulean blue eyes couldn’t stop staring at was the bright red kanji on the corner of Shukaku’s redhead which said **‘Ai’** meaning _‘Love’_ in Japanese. Now that he thought about it, the little racoon in Shukaku’s avatar had a little heart in the same spot.

The redhead stared at the offered hand for a moment then seemed to stare at the blonde.

“Likewise.” The deep voice responded, Naruto trying not to pout as he retreated his hand, feeling a bit disappointed.

“Would you like something to drink while we wait? I think I need some coffee in order to function, I am a total coffee addict...well coffee second only to ramen but who doesn’t like ramen? It should be a crime not to like ramen!” Naruto knew he was rambling and that his cheeks were probably bright red but he couldn’t help it!

“Very well.” The redhead quietly replied, which made the blonde smile, moving to grab the pale hand without thinking but felt it pull away.

“Ah sorry...I do get accused of being very affectionate and physical.” Naruto murmured, looking like a kicked puppy.

_“I...have never been touched before.”_ The redhead quietly replied, so quiet that for a moment the blonde wondered if he imagined it.

“You’ve never been touched?” Naruto asked with furrowed brows, seeing the redhead shake his head which made the blonde stare in shock.

“Not...not even your hands or hugs?!” Naruto asked in surprise, looking aghast at the thought.

“No.” Was the simple reply, heading toward the coffee shop.

“Do you have a fear of germs or something like that?” Naruto asked, tilting his head slightly.

“...Something like that.” Shukaku replied, opening the door and letting the tanned male go first. 

The cafe was small with beige colored bricks and dark wood floors, there were plants everywhere from cactuses to roses, each small table seemed to be made out of ashwood and had a succulent plant in the middle.

Naruto read through the menu, humming until he made his choice and went to the cashier, looking at the name tag “Hello Amy, how are you today?” He brightly asked her.

The young girl stared in shock for a moment before smiling brightly “I am well thank you, sir...how may I help you today?” 

“I am fine, thank you for asking! May I please have a black coffee with 5 sugar...and can I please have an extra fudge brownie with loads of cream...what would you like, Shukaku-san?” He asked brightly, turning to look at his companion for the day.

The redhead was quiet for a minute or so “...Aloe juice, please.” A pale hand moved to remove his gourd but Naruto moved his hand forward in a stop motion.

“Oh no, my friend...it's my treat, you are joining me today without needing to, at least let me do this for you!” Naruto asked, offering his card before the redhead could stop him, then added a $5.00 cash tip in the jar. 

The young girl apparently wasn’t used to it because she stared at the money in shock “Oh wow...thank you so much sir! That’s really generous of you!” 

“Not at all, thank you for your hard work, Amy!” Naruto seemed oblivious to the blush on the girl’s cheeks.

“Your order will be done in a moment, please choose a seat and I’ll bring your order to you!” Amy brightly said, glancing between Naruto and Shukaku curiously.

Naruto nodded, looking at the smaller male “Are you sure you only want aloe juice? You can get something else if you’d like.” The blonde said, walking toward the end of the cafe, sitting by the window so that he could people watch.

“I am fine, thank you.” The redhead replied, moving to sit across from Naruto, setting the gourd down on the floor.

The blonde was curious about the dark sunglasses, wondering what was hidden behind it, wondering if Shukaku was like Shino, shuddering remembering the bug boy “How come you are wearing sunglasses indoors, Shukaku-san? Not that you have to answer or anything if you don’t want to!”

The redhead was quiet for a bit before responding “My eyes are sensitive to light.”

“Oooh, sorry for prying! If it makes you feel any better I have a really sensitive nose...Sasuke used to say that it could rival a dog.” Naruto brightly said before the smile faltered thinking about his best friend before pushing the bitter thoughts away. 

“...Sasuke?” There seemed to be a hint of curiosity in that aloof voice.

“Yeah, he’s my best friend! You remind me a lot of him but much nicer, that bastard was always insulting me or ignoring me, believe it! But he was really nice deep down...he **is** really nice, deep down. He’s just a bit misunderstood, that’s all.” Naruto tried to keep up the bright smile, feeling an ache in his chest, as if someone ripped off his heart. No, he couldn’t give up, Naruto Uzumaki was not a quitter!

“Hm.” Just in time their drinks came and Naruto’s fudge brownie with extra whip cream. The taller male offered the smaller one a bite but the smaller one politely declined.

“I don’t think you are a killer, Shukaku-san. I think we all have a monster inside of us...sometimes good and sometimes not so good.There is always a voice in our head that tells us to do things or makes us sometimes believe something that is not true.” The blonde was talking from personal experience, turning to look outside, having the perfect view of his car from where they were sitting.

“How do you know if I have or have not killed someone, Kyuubi-san?” Shukaku quietly asked, looking down at his lap.

“I know real killers...you aren’t one of them, Shukaku-san. At least you understand that you have a darkness inside of you and are brave enough to admit to it...most people don’t, they let that fear take hold of them and break them.” Naruto replied, moving to take a sip of his coffee then stuck his tongue out as he felt it get burned “Ow...ow...one of these days I won’t burn it!” 

A snort escaped the paler male, moving to take a sip of his juice.

The tan male did a fake offended look “How dare you my good sir! How dare you laugh at my pain.” He said dramatically, holding on to his heart then started laughing, enjoying his time with the redhead. It felt as if they’ve been friends for years.

“You are surprisingly clumsy, Kyuubi-san.” Shukaku murmured, seeming to be staring at the blonde.

“Surprisingly?” Naruto asked with a laugh “Oh, I am extremely clumsy but it gets overlooked due to my dashing good looks.” The blonde grinned, wiggling his eyebrows then threw his head back in laughter “I am just kidding about the good looking part...but yes, I am quite clumsy especially with my coffee.”

“I think you are good looking, Kyuubi-san.” The redhead said matter of factly, without a hint of embarrassment.

The blonde felt his cheeks brighten and his eyes grow wide, staring at Shukaku in surprise. Was the redhead hitting on him? No, it didn’t sound like it.

“T-Thank you.” Was all that the writer could say, looking down almost shyly, rubbing the back of his neck. He tried drinking his coffee again, glancing at the redhead then down. “Is your hair really that red?” He blurted out.

“Yes.” It felt as if Shukaku was staring straight at him through those dark sunglasses.

“Oh wow...I really like it especially with your pale skin, you look like a doll...wait maybe it’s not a good thing to call another guy a doll, is it? I don’t think any guy wants to hear that they look delicate.” The taller male said with a sheepish grin, rubbing the back of his neck. 

When Naruto heard that snort again, he laughed, by now associating that sound with the closest thing he’d get to a laugh from the smaller male. “That is the first time I’ve been called delicate.” Was that a hint of amusement behind the aloof voice?

“Well ya know what they say...I am all up for breaking firsts.” Naruto teased with a wink. He broke his fudge brownie in half, offering the other half to the redhead with a bright smile.

Shukaku looked down at the offered brownie once more and decided to take it, then looked back to the blonde “...Thank you.” With that the smaller male took a small bite of the brownie, it tasted good. 

Naruto was having a good time, he couldn’t remember how long it’s been since he laughed so much and felt so at ease, a small part of him feeling guilty about it. Shukaku seemed like someone he could become good friends with.

_‘Friends...it’s okay for me to have more friends, right?’_ The blonde thought, taking a bite of his brownie. He kept laughing and joking with the redhead, trying to remind himself that it was okay for him to keep on living.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The band is real and one of my favorite Japanese bands, the elementary school and the addressed used are all made up by me. Only Naruto would tell someone like Gaara that he looks delicate haha.


	5. ch5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Shukaku attend their first event together, Shukaku finds out what is a mother's love.

After their chat in the small cafe, they walked to the elementary school together. Naruto kept making jokes, grinning as he heard the snorting sound, he wondered what it would sound like if Shukaku laughed.

The blonde had stopped first to take out a black bag which had different masks. He put on a white with orange Japanese fox mask which only showed his cerulean blue eyes, then he offered a racoon Japanese mask to the redhead, stopping once he realized that it wouldn’t fit due to the dark sunglasses “Sorry, that was insensitive of me.” The blonde murmured, rubbing the back of his head.

“There is no need to apologize, thank you for the thought.” The redhead responded and that was that.

Once at the school they were greeted by the staff and students, Naruto gave the masks to the children, smiling down at the young boy they were meant to meet.

“Thank you for coming, Mr. Kyuubi, Mr Shukaku.” The mother stared at them, staring longer at Shukaku “Oh wow...you are so much younger than I imagined...both of you!” She covered her mouth, blushing. “Sorry about that, I didn’t mean to sound rude...anyways, I am Emily Anderson and this is my son Emmett Anderson.” 

The little brunette stared at both of them quietly then pointed at Shukaku “Mommy...why does that mister not have eyebrows? Is he a monster like me?” The boy innocently asked, the mother moving to quickly apologize.

“I am sorry about that...Emmett dear, we don’t point or say things like that, remember?” She quietly scolded him.

“...It’s okay, I am used to it.” Shukaku calmly responded, the little boy moving to hide behind his mother.

“And his voice is really scawy as well!”Emmett exclaimed.

“More scarier than mine? Raaaawwr!” Naruto stepped in, fake roaring and laughing which seemed to ease up the young boy who started laughing as well.

“He’s my special friend and just like you he’s been called a monster...but monsters are just superhuman...like Iron Man or Superman!” The blonde added.

“Thank you again for coming...my Emmett is a bit different.” Emily moved to pull up the left side of the little boy’s pants up, showing a prosthetic leg “This is why he’s called a monster.” She sobbed out.

A bell rang and the teacher came to get them. They were meant to have a rally race but Emmett didn’t want to participate since the other kids kept making fun of him.

“Welcome everyone to our annual relay race, today we have two very special guests, let’s show them all of our hard work preparing for this event!” The principle said, the small kids each had a mask that Naruto brought. It ranges from frogs to birds and canines. Emmett had on a dog one with green marking on it.

Shukaku was next to Naruto and Emmett. They could hear some of the children whispering how slow Emmett was and noticed the way that some of the parents looked at the little brunette with pity.

Everyone moved to grab the hand of the one next to them except for the redhead, there was a countdown and then all of the little kids began to run.

Naruto started running as well, laughing and giggling. The redhead followed much slowly, stopping when he realized that Emmett had remained in the start line.

“...You can either choose to remain weak forever and have your mother protect you...or you can choose to become strong in order to protect those you care about...what will you do?” Shukaku asked the child, quiet enough so only the two of them could hear it. “You won’t always be protected.”

Emmett stared up at the redhead for a moment then started to weakly run, only to stumble and fall, by now Naruto had run back and everyone had stopped.

“I-I-I want to become strong and protect mommy!!! I want to hear mommy laughing again instead of crying everyday because of me!” The brunette firmly said “B-But I am still weak.”

“You can do it, Emmett! You can get up and keep fighting, believe it!!!!” The blonde brightly said, getting everyone to start cheering for the little boy.

_**“Emmett, Emmett, Emmett!!”**_ Everyone cheered.

Naruto moved to slowly help the little boy up but Shukaku stopped him with a shake of his head.

“He can do it.” Was all the redhead said, watching as the little boy struggled to get up since his prosthetic leg didn’t fold too well but after a bit of trying he managed to get up.

The redhead and the blonde ran slowly, staying by the little boy’s side as they crossed the finish line together then everyone cheered and Emmett smiled brightly.

Emily was laughing and crying, hugging her son “Thank you...thank you so much for making my Emmett happy again...thank you, I don’t know how I could ever repay you two.” She sobbed out.

The brunette woman stood up and hugged the blonde first then hugged the redhead before he could pull away. Shukaku stood frozen in place, Naruto having to check up on him.

“...Shukaku-san?” He asked a bit worried.

“...Is this a mother’s love, Kyuubi-san?” Shukaku quietly asked.

The blonde felt his eyes widened at the question but then smiled brightly and nodded “Yes, this is part of a mother’s love.” Naruto replied softly.

They bid their farewell to everyone and walked back toward Naruto’s car, the blonde taking off his mask.

“I had a lot of fun with you today...thank you again for accepting this request. Tomorrow we have the divorce one, when and where would you like to meet?” The tanned male asked, wishing that they could spend more time together but unable to understand why he felt that way.

“Same as today.” The redhead replied.

Naruto moved to touch Shukaku but stopped himself and smiled warmly “I really  **am** happy that we met, Shukaku-san. This is the most fun I’ve had in a long time. See you tomorrow.” With that he got inside his car, giving one last wave to the redhead before driving away. 

_ Maybe Shukaku and he could become good friends, that should be alright. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ch5 of 5 done for the first day! I hope you've enjoyed it thus far. I'll be posting the next chapter on Monday, depending how much I am able to write ahead I might post a second chapter as well. Next chapter they'll be seeing a divorce case and what it means to fall out of love.
> 
> Please do let me know what you guys think. Kudos and comments are also adored!
> 
> Until next time,  
> -Y-


	6. ch6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shukaku & Naruto meet a couple that is divorcing. They also grow closer after Naruto loses his temper. 
> 
> Warning for slight reference about suicide, nothing graphic at all just the word used.

Naruto met Shukaku a few blocks away from the restaurant they were meant to meet the couple in. The blonde had spent last night thinking about the redhead, going over each conversation and wondering why the redhead had tattooed the kanji for love in bright red letters on his forehead.

“Good morning, Shukaku-san!” The blonde brightly greeted, when they finally met up. Naruto was dressed in a button down orange shirt with a black jacket and black trousers, finishing it off with orange converse. 

Shukaku was dressed in a crimson button down shirt with a long, beige jacket and trousers, as well as that beige gourd from yesterday, finishing it off with crimson combat boots and those familiar dark sunglasses.

“...Good morning, Kyuubi-san.” The redhead quietly greeted with a slight bow of his head. 

“I wonder if people really can fall out of love...was it love to begin with?”Naruto softly asked, looking down at the ground.

“Perhaps not.” Shukaku replied.

Naruto put on his fox mask once more to hide his face then they went inside the restaurant which was empty except for some staff, a couple at a table and their lawyers.

The raven got up as soon as she saw them, she had short black hair framing her tanned face with light brown eyes and a knee length black dress that showed off her slim figure.

“Shukaku, Kyuubi?” She asked brightly, moving to hug both of them but the redhead stepped away.

“Mr.Shukaku is a bit shy.” Naruto stepped in, giving his charming smile “Thank you for inviting us today.”

“Thank you for coming! Oh wow...you two are much younger than I had expected.” She giggled and led them toward the table.

“Now Shukaku...this is what greed looks like. I gave this man the best of my years, even helped him pay for his school so that he could start his career...and how does he repay me? By leaving me for someone younger!” The raven said.

“Barbara, you know it’s not like that...why don’t you tell these two how you are always demanding more from me?! How nothing is ever good enough, if anything, you are the greedy one!” The bald man said with a scowl on his face.

“Oh that’s rich coming from you, Tom. I gave you everything! I’ve always encouraged you to be the best that you can be but apparently you don’t even have the balls to do that...Daddy always told me that I’d regret marrying you, that you were a good for nothing!” Barbara replied with a roll of her eyes.

“See what I have to deal with?! She’s always insulting me like this and acting like the victim!” Tom snapped, glaring at the woman.

“...Why did the two of you get married in the first place since you hate each other?”Shukaku asked quietly.

Both of them looked shocked at the question “Because I loved her...I still love her. Barbara has always been very confident and demanding, she always knows what she wants and when she wants it, even when we met in high school. But these past few years she’s been acting cruel...as if no matter what I do it's not good enough and all that’s been left in my heart is an emptiness and a bad taste in my mouth.” 

“Is that what falling out of love is?” Shukaku asked, staring at both of them.

“I’ve never hated you, Tom...I’ve always loved the fact that you would set goals and try to reach them. I love your kindness and that temper of yours...but after I lost...after **that** happened it feels like things changed between us, you wouldn’t even touch me and then you found yourself that young girl! I felt like I was being thrown away. I am broken goods, that's what it felt like you were telling me.” Barbara replied, tears falling down her tanned cheek. 

“Emptiness...anger..a bad taste, yes perhaps that’s what falling out of love is.” She softly added.

“...Were you two ever really in love to begin with?” Naruto softly asked, looking down at the floor “Shouldn’t you be fighting for her instead of letting her go? And you...shouldn’t you be fighting for him?” 

Tom frowned “What would you know, blondie? Things aren't always so simple. I’ll always love you Barbara...but I can’t be with you anymore, not like that...not as lovers. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me but I don’t want to wake up one day and hate you.” 

Barbara sobbed and stood up “I’ll kill myself Tom...I’ll kill myself if you really do divorce me!” She shouted.

“Don’t you **ever** say that! Do you know how lucky you are to be alive...to at least have the person you love still be alive and well?!”Naruto suddenly snapped, glaring at Barbara “At least you are both healthy...and still alive, why would you want to give that away?” His voice sounded choked up.

“...Kyuubi?” Barbara asked surprised, then frowned “What would **you** know about loving someone that much?” She snapped, glaring at him.

“Barbara!” Tom scolded.

“No, I want to know! What would you know about loving someone so much that it literally kills you to see them with someone else? You don’t..do you?” She huffed at him with a roll of her eyes, wiping away her tears.

“This is human greed.” Shukaku simply stared, seeming to be staring at Barbara.

The raven widened her eyes then moved to slap Shukaku but Naruto stopped her, holding a small wrist in his much larger one “ **_Don’t you dare touch him._ **” The blonde’s voice had lowered and came out cold, staring at the woman with cold, cerulean blue eyes.

“Do you know why your husband is truly leaving you for someone else? Because you are acting selfishly...because you can’t seem to think about anyone else but yourself and frankly I am surprised anyone can even put up with you.” The blonde coldly said, holding on tighter to the smaller wrist before letting it go. “We are done here, let’s go Shukaku.”

The redhead looked at the blonde in surprise, shock at the change in personality but nodded.

“Fine! You want me to sign those stupid divorce papers?! Fine! Do whatever you want, Tom!” Barbara snapped, quickly signing the papers and then roughly bumped into the redhead and stormed out.

The smaller male fell from the force of the impact, his dark sunglasses falling off as well.

“Shukaku….are you okay?!” Naruto asked worriedly, moving to go and help him up then stopped and stared at the pupiless green eyes, they looked like two glass bottles. The shock seemed to last only a second or two before he quickly put the dark sunglasses on the redhead’s face once more “Are you okay, Shukaku-san?” Voice still sounded worried, as if nothing had happened between them.

“...Wow that’s freaky.” Tom mumbled then shook his head “Thank you both for your help, I thought she would never sign those papers.” 

Naruto frowned as the redhead got up, declining his help. “He’s not freaky at all, he’s Shukaku.” Naruto coldly said, then huffed “Let’s go, Shukaku-san.” 

The blonde stormed out, running a hand through his blonde hair and cursing.

“...Kyuubi-san?” The redhead quietly asked.

The blonde stared at the redhead and shook his head, taking off his mask “Sorry that you had to see me like that...it’s just...it’s just that people shouldn’t take death lightly, you know?” 

“But the only reason we exist is to die.” Shukaku stated matter of factly.

“Not like that! Not by suicide!” Naruto snapped then looked down “Sorry...it’s a sore topic for me...sorry, Shukaku-san.” 

“Don’t apologize to me.” The redhead replied “...I should apologize to you.”

“Huh...why?” The blonde asked confused, his anger seeming to be gone all of a sudden.

“I startled you earlier.” The redhead replied “...With my freaky eyes.”

The blonde stared in shock then shook his head “Freaky eyes? Don’t ever call yourself a freak in front of me, got it?! So what if your eyes are...somewhat unique, that makes them special, it’s nothing to be ashamed of!” The blonde passionately replied “ Besides, I think they are quite beautiful. They are like a porcelain doll...you are like a really beautiful porcelain doll!” The blonde realized what he said and felt his face turn red “Ah...probably not good to compare you again to a porcelain doll.”

There was silence for a minute or two and then a snort “Only you would call me that, Kyuubi-san.” 

“...Naruto, My name is Naruto Uzumaki, believe it!” The blonde grinned “We are friends so you should probably know my real name, huh?”

“We are...friends?” The redhead asked, sounding a bit surprised.

“Yes, of course we are!” The blonde brightly replied.

“...You are the first friend I’ve ever had.” The redhead quietly said. “...My name is Gaara.” 

“First friend? I highly doubt that. It's nice to officially meet you, Gaara-san!” The blonde brightly said “Mind if we get out of here?” 

“...I actually need to go. Thank you for today, Uzumaki-san.”The redhead replied.

“Call me Naruto, we are friends, remember?” The blonde said, trying not to sulk too much at the fact that their time together has come to an end “Oh...alright, I won’t keep you from whatever you need to do.”

“...Perhaps we could see each other another time?” The redhead asked, looking away, cheeks red.

Naruto grinned and nodded “Yeah...Yeah, I’d love that, believe it!” The blonde excitedly said “Let me know when you want to meet up again and we’ll make it happen!”

“Hai...I will see you next time, Naruto-kun. Goodbye.” The redhead gave a slight bow and walked away.

“Not goodbye...but a see you later.” Naruto softly replied, watching the retreating figure. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, as promised you'll be getting two chapters today if I can write a little ahead I might release a third chapter this week. Thanks to Kanpachiro for the first kudo and bookmark it means a lot to me ^_^ Also thanks to Binbread for the kudos and there is one more person but they didn't leave a name. 
> 
> Thanks to everyone who has been reading, hopefully it doesn't disappoint. Next chapter made me chuckle a bit, there will also be a bit of SasuNaru toward the end of next chapter. As of right now there is more than 25 chapter planned for this story, I am thinking it might actually make it to the 40s or so for the first arc, we'll see.
> 
> Until next time!  
> -Y-


	7. Ch7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaara and Naruto grow closer. Some SasuNaru at the end.

_ “Dear Kyuubi, _

_ I met someone a few months ago and we quickly became friends...the more we talked, the more I realized that I’ve fallen for this person but the problem is that I don’t think they are over their first love who died in a car accident two years ago. _

_ I’ve been thinking about confessing my feelings to this person...but I don’t want to ruin our friendship and I don’t want to be second best. _

_ What should I do? _

_ -Secondbest- _

* * *

_ Dear Secondbest, _

_ I think we don’t ever truly get over our first love, it’s the first time we learned what it means to truly be attracted to someone and care about them.  _

_ First loves can be beautiful...but they can also be extremely painful, especially if that person is taken away from us so suddenly. No matter how much time has passed, it’s difficult to forget someone that was taken from us. _

_ If you like this person, you should let them know your true feelings for we never know which day will be our last. Tell them that you value your friendship above all but that you like them and that the rest is up to them. _

_ Don’t compare yourself with their deceased first love...you are who you are, believe it! _

_ Good luck and thanks for reaching out to me! _

_ XoXoXo Kyuubi XoXoXo” _

Naruto drank some of his coffee and sighed softly, remembering piercing dark eyes staring at his brighter ones. He could clearly remember the screeching sound and the honking of horns.

The blonde quickly shook his head and turned to look at his phone. He’s been talking to Gaara almost daily though they haven’t met up yet...even though it’s been almost three month since that day when the blonde had lost his temper and had seen those glass looking pupiless eyes.

The more that they talked, the more that Naruto likes Gaara. The redhead might not be much of a talker but he was extremely smart and nice. The blonde really enjoyed hearing the redhead talk even if it wasn’t a lot. For the most part Naruto would be the one doing the talking and Gaara would either snort, give short responses or humm. 

They had done a few video chats for the blog, with Naruto having to end the last one quite early when the couple started almost having sex. The blonde had felt his cheeks reddened and he had stuttered an apology to the redhead.

“...So that’s human lust…” Was all the redhead had said matter of factly.

Naruto snapped out of his thoughts when he heard a familiar ringtone and picked up “Hello, Sakura-chan!” He brightly greeted, trying to ignore the guilt he still felt.

“Morning Naru...have you eaten? Have you been going to your sessions?” She softly asked him.

“Yes I have...and yes I have! I am fine...promise!” He brightly said, nodding.

“You do sound happier...I am glad. Remember, if you need anything at all...anything, no matter how small, you let me know...alright? Also...something should be arriving soon, Sarada wanted to send you a drawing she made. You really don’t have to keep sending us money every month...it’s not your responsibility, Naru.”The pinkette softly said, her voice starting to sound a bit choked up.

“But it  **is** my responsibility, Sakura. We’ve had this talk and nothing has changed.” He replied firmly “I’ll let you know as soon as I get the drawing, please thank Sarada-chan for me and tell her that I still have the masterpiece she wrote me on my fridge!” 

“...It wasn’t your fault, Naruto...when will you stop punishing yourself?” Sakura sighed then shouting was heard from her side, as if someone was calling for her. “I need to go...and he’s doing the same as always. Please take care of yourself Naruto...and remember to call me!” With that she hung up.

Naruto listened to the sound of the line going dead for a minute or two, staring up at the ceiling, remembering the way that Sakura had cried, the way she had been unable to look at him for such a long time. 

He hung up as well, grateful when he heard Gaara’s ringtone _**‘Mr Sandman, bring me a drea-’** _The blonde picked up, forcing a smile on his face and for his voice to sound cheerful “Hello Gaara-kun! How are you?” 

“...Is something wrong, Naruto-kun?” The redhead asked, voice sounding aloof as usual.

“Huh? Why?” Naruto asked confused.

“...Forget it…” Then the redhead added “Would you be free this Saturday at 6pm?”

“Oh Gaara-kun, could it be you are asking me out on a date?” The blonde teased.

“Yes, I am.” The redhead replied matter of factly.

Naruto felt his cheek redden but told himself that the redhead was joking, he let out a nervous laugh “Good one, Gaara-kun!” He said “I am free Saturday, see you then!” Then he hung up and held on to his chest, trying to tell his heart to slow down.

**_‘Someone like you isn’t allowed to like someone...not after what you did, you monster.’_ ** A dark voice inside of Naruto’s head coldly said. Cerulean blue eyes blankly staring at his prosthetic hand, a reminder of his sin.

He could feel a familiar coldness washing through his body, an emptiness that he hated with a passion. The blonde tried to ignore the feeling, trying to get lost in responding to questions in his blogs.

There was no way that Gaara was actually asking him out on a date...they’ve only met twice face to face...and sure they’ve been constantly talking to each other but there was no way that the redhead was interested in him.

Naruto went to shower and got changed into his orange sweatpants, orange matching hoodie and underneath a black shirt, then put on his black running shoes and decided to go for a run to clean up his thoughts.

He thought about the auburn locks, about the snort and the deep voice then ran faster. No, he had no interest whatsoever in the redhead, it was simply friendship!

Friendship...that was all he could ever offer someone else.

* * *

_ “You are such an idiot, Naruto...tch!” Dark eyes glared at him but all that the blonde could see was amusement. _

_ “Hey bastard, you should be glad to be able to date someone as amazing as me...not my fault they thought we were a couple.” The blonde teased, cheeks flushed. Truth was both of them were probably a bit...or a lot...drunk. Turns out Naruto wasn’t the only lightweight one. _

_ “Why would I date an idiot like you...and why the hell would you be the ‘top’ whatever that means!” Sasuke snapped, hitting Naruto upside the head as they stumbled to Sasuke’s apartment. _

_ Naruto burst out laughing, remembering the conversation again, how a random group of girls had come up to them and said that they made a cute couple...and that Naruto was probably a great top before giggling and walking away, also clearly drunk. _

_ “It means you take it from me, Sasu-dear~” Naruto jokes, making kissy sounds and laughing louder, almost curling up and bringing Sasuke down with him. _

_ “Oi idiot, watch what you are doing! You are already heavy!” Sasuke snapped, cheeks bright red, he could see the glass apartment. “And I wouldn’t let you do that!”  _

_ Naruto kept giggling, standing right back up as they finished stumbling to Sasuke’s apartment. They made it to the elevator with Naruto still snickering and Sasuke elbowing him rather roughly. _

_ “Sorrry, Sasu-dear~” Naruto teased only to be hit again, the raven growling. _

_ “Oi, I told you to shut up, idiot!” The raven snapped, leading his best friend inside the rather luxurious apartment. _

_ “Or what, Sasu-dear?” Naruto teased, laughing so hard that tears were streaming down his reddening cheeks and he gasped for air. _

_ “Or I’ll make you!” Sasuke growled out. _

_ “Oh yeah...how?” Naruto wiggled his eyebrows and laughed only to stop when he felt warm lips against his own. _

_ He kissed back happily, wrapping his arms around the raven’s neck. A small part of him was telling him that they should stop since they were clearly drunk but he didn’t care. _

_ They kissed for a little longer, Sasuke arching into him, Naruto biting down on the paler male’s bottom lip while squeezing Sasuke’s rear before they pulled away, both panting. _

_ “I really like you, Sasuke.”The blonde warmly said, pulling the raven into a hug, feeling a warmth spreading throughout his body “I like you so much.” _

* * *

Naruto woke up with a gasp, he had gone for his run, came back and had thought about closing his eyes only for a second but ended up falling asleep. That memory felt like a ton of brick now, leaving only a bitter taste in his mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is Gaara and Naruto's first date. I was going to wait later to release it but I feel like this chapter flows better with the next one so I'll be releasing it right away.
> 
> You guys also get to find out the meaning of a cacti in flower language! 
> 
> Thanks for reading, please make sure to leave kudos, comments and to bookmark! It lets me know that you are enjoying the story and if you aren't, feel free to give constructive feedback! Also, if you want Naruto to answer one of your questions you are still on time to have that happen!
> 
> -Y-


	8. Ch8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaara and Naruto's first date! You also get to find out the meaning of a cacti in flower language which cracked me out when I discovered it the first time.

Naruto had thought about canceling his appointment with Gaara, after that memory the blonde had barely slept. He kept reminding himself that feeling down wouldn’t fix anything.

Once the redhead texted him the address, Naruto had searched for something to wear. They were going to some art gallery that the redhead seemed excited about.

The blonde put on a button down orange shirt with a black jacket and black trousers, finishing it off with black dressed shoes and tried rather hard to fix his unruly spiky blonde hair but couldn’t.

Naruto kept telling himself it wasn’t a date but he still made a stop and got the redhead a small Christmas cacti only because the flower lady assured him that it was really easy to take care of and wouldn’t need that much light, there was even a small booklet included which explained how to take care of the small plant.

The blonde parked in front of white marbled building, there was already a group of nicely dressed people going in and out. He sent a text to the redhead letting him know that he’s arrived before stepping out of his car with the small plant.

It didn’t take long for him to see the redhead who was dressed in a crimson suit with a beige button down shirt and a small gourd on his side, finishing it off with the dark sunglasses. 

There were people staring at the redhead and whispering, looking shocked.

Naruto smiled brightly, feeling his heartbeat speed up “Hey, thanks for inviting me.” He warmly said, offering the small cacti with reddening cheek “I know it's not much...but the flower lady said they don’t need a lot of light so I thought they might be good..and I remember you drinking aloe juice so yeah.” 

A snort left Gaara’s lips, the redhead shaking his head before moving to grab the small plant, their fingertips brushing against each other for a second.

“What’s so funny? Would you have prefered roses? Never figured you for a rose type, Gaara-kun.” Naruto wiggled his eyebrows and laughed.

“Cactus are actually my favorite plants...you do not know the Japanese meaning of them, do you?” Gaara sounded almost amused.

“....Meaning? No, why?” The blonde asked, confused.

“Perhaps it's better if you don’t know.” The redhead replied, still sounding amused.

Naruto furrowed his brows and took out his phone, checking out the meaning then felt his cheeks turn a bright red. “I-I don’t want to sleep with you! I mean, it’s not like you are ugly or something, you are actually really handsome and it’s not like I am saying it would be a bad thing if someone slept with you but I don’t want to...not yet..wait I didn’t mean to say that!” Naruto was ranting and knew it.

A soft laugh left Gaara’s lips, making the blonde stare in shock, wondering if he was imagining it. That sound was one of the most beautiful things that Naruto has ever heard, he was saddened when it suddenly stopped.

“Relax Naruto-kun, I know. Thank you for the gift.” The redhead softly said.

“I...errmm...yeah.” The blonde replied in a daze, cheeks reddening more.

“Are you alright, Naruto-kun?” Gaara asked “You are looking quite red.” 

“Jesus Gaara...I swear you’ll make my heart stop one of these days, even your laugh sounds wonderful.” He pressed a palm to his chest, trying to calm down the beating heart “So gallery, what are we watching?” The blonde asked, trying to change the subject, he couldn’t believe he just said that.

The redhead was quiet for almost a whole minute, lips parted slightly in shock before clearing his throat, cheeks reddening.

“We are seeing the work of a sculpture I know.” He replied, leading Naruto inside the gallery.

It had different types of white sculptures, some were birds such as owls and doves, there were also some ravens.

“Sabaku-No Gaara, what a pleasure it is to see you, Hn.”A tall, beautiful blonde said, then turned to look at Naruto “You finally decided to stop being chaste and get yourself a boyfriend? This one looks like a stud.” 

Naruto covered his mouth, trying hard not to laugh, cheeks reddening at the compliment. “Ah...we are not da-”

“The gallery is looking nice...did you finish the one I asked?” Gaara interrupted sounding aloof.

“Of course my dear...who do you think I am? Hn.” The blonde sculpture asked with a grin “I am the art master Deidara. It’s in the back, Hn.” 

“Thank you.” With that Gaara began to walk away, not before hearing Deidara call out.

“If you get bored of him send him my way, with a body like that I fu-” But the rest was muffled.

“Ah...he seems interesting.” Naruto said with a sheepish grin “What’s in the back?” 

“You will see.” Was all the redhead responded, leading the blonde past the group of people who were admiring all the different types of sculpture. Gaara opened a metal door, going to the back of the white marble building.

In the middle of it was a sculpture, it had what looked to be Gaara with his arms folded and looking disinterested, a racoon tail behind him with a gourd on his back and little racoon ears. Right next to the sculpted Gaara was a Naruto who was grinning and offering his hand, he had fox ears and a few tails behind him, touching the tip of Gaara’s tail. It looked to be made out of glass.

“Oh wow...that is beautiful.” Naruto breathed out, getting closer, analyzing every bit of it “Wow...that really looks like me and the little half racoon looks like you!” The blonde gushed.

“I am glad you like it.” Gaara softly said, watching as Naruto admired the sculpture, even touching them.

“Did Deidara-san make this?”Naruto asked, his fingertips touching the one that looked like him.

“He heated it up.” Gaara replied.

“Heated up the sculpture? Then who made it?” Naruto asked confused.

“...I did…” The redhead softly replied, glancing away.

“You sculpted this? Wow that’s amazing Gaara-kun, you are really talented!” Naruto said in awe, staring at the glass eyes of his lookalike sculpture.

“...Thank you…” Gaara was not one who showed his sculptures to just anyone. He had spent almost two months sculpting it and coming up with the idea. It was worth it to see the look of awe in Naruto’s face.

“How do you sculpt with glass? It must have been extremely hard to do.” Naruto said, turning to look at Gaara with a bright smile on his face.

“I sculpted it with sand...then Deidara-san heated up the sand with his special machine and turned it into glass.” The paler male replied, seeming to be looking down at the small cacti that Naruto gave him. 

The redhead was surprised when he felt a warmth around him, realizing that Naruto was hugging him, his dark sunglasses falling down to the floor. Gaara stood frozen, this close to the blonde he could smell ramen and clothes deodorant which seem to have a slight citrus scent to it.

“You are the best, Gaara-kun.” Naruto warmly said only to realize what he was doing and quickly pulling away, rubbing the back of his neck “S-Sorry, I guess I got...carried...away.” The blonde stared at the pupiless jaded green eyes, hand stretching to trace underneath the eyes, no matter how hard he stared he couldn’t find pupils. “Your eyes are really beautiful...it's like staring at glass.” The blonde murmured, as if in a daze.

Gaara stood still, holding on to his breath. The redhead shivered feeling the warm touch and stared back, this was not the type of reaction that he was used to getting when people saw his eyes, not that he cared what they thought but he **did** care what the blonde thought of him.

“...You don’t think it makes me look like a monster?” Gaara quietly asked.

“You’d make for a really beautiful monster.” Naruto replied just as quietly, leaning his face closer. The dark circles under the eyes made the color pop out even more, this close to the redhead he noticed that there were no eyelashes either. 

For a moment those jaded green eyes suddenly turned to much darker ones framed with long, black lashes, the blonde pulled away and cleared his throat, mentally cursing himself out “Sorry...I errmm...you don’t like being touched.” 

“...I don’t mind if Naruto-kun is the one to touch me.” The redhead replied “Naruto-kun, I like you. When I am near you...this part doesn’t ache anymore.” Gaara confessed, touching where his heart was “I think this is what Uncle Yashamaru talked about...the special medicine for aches there.” 

“The...special medicine for aches in the heart?” Naruto asked, wondering if he guessed right and trying to understand what it is. He figured it was better than dwelling on the fact that the redhead had just confessed his feelings to him.

“Yes...Uncle Yashamaru tried to give it to me but in the end it was a lie...and my mother gave it to me when she gave all her blood for me.” Gaara explained, thinking back to his childhood for a moment, the longing he had to feel a mother’s embrace or to be acknowledged but everyone treated him either as someone extremely fragile or as a monster.

“What’s that special medicine?” Naruto asked, tilting his head.

“Love.” Was all Gaara said, his hand moving up to touch the tattoo on his forehead.

The blonde felt his cheeks reddened, biting the inside of his cheek “I can’t love you Gaara...I can’t fall in love with anyone not after the grave sin I committed...I am sorry.” The blonde bowed and quickly ran off, running past the people admiring all the sculptures, he ran past Deidara and stopped only when he was inside his car, his hand shaking as he moved to turn it on but his prosthetic arm wouldn’t move.

Naruto cursed, trying again, having to use his other arm to turn on the car and drive, trying to calm himself down. He kept telling himself that Gaara was just confusing gratefulness with love, there was no way that the redhead was in love with him.

The blonde barely remembered making it inside his house and into his room, he got undressed, moving to lay on his bed, grabbing the picture of Sasuke and him, the raven was smirking while Naruto wrapped an arm around him with a grin on his face and a peace sign.

“I won’t betray you Sasu...I won’t forget what I did.” The blonde promised, holding on to the picture and staring up at the ceiling. He tried staying up but sleep slowly overtook him as did the familiar nightmares.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading this far! Please leave kudos, comments and bookmark it lets me know that you are enjoying the story and helps me out a lot!
> 
> Next chapter Naruto and Gaara make up, Gaara gets to see Naruto's house and their relationship develops more. I'll probably release ch9 next week on Monday, if I manage to write far enough I'll post it in a few days. Trying to pace myself so that you guys can have enough material if I get a writer block for this story, so far it hasn't happened since Naruto cracks me up but we'll see.
> 
> Also, just because I don't think I've addressed it in later chapters, Gaara wears contacts when he's not wearing his dark glasses. He has a condition called Aniridia which makes it so that someone doesn't have pupil it also means that they are extremely sensitive to light if they are not wearing special glasses or contacts. It's a really interesting condition if any of you are interested in reading up on it.
> 
> Until next time!  
> -Y-


	9. ch9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaara visits Naruto home and Naruto makes a big reveal!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said I'd give only 1-2 chapter per weeks but I can already tell that's not going to happen haha. This might be a long list so bear with me. Thanks to BinBread, Coopernathan, Alexgalva98 and gaara_of_the_desert for your comments! They've made my day, hopefully I replied to everyone if not just let me know.
> 
> Thanks to gaara_of_the_desert, AlexGalva98, Merumaru, Coopernathan, rosymax and the other 4 guests for leaving kudos and thanks to everyone who has been reading. I was going to wait until next week to release these next two chapter so that I could be far ahead just in case I get writer blocks but seeing as how the latest chapter I wrote today ended up being 30 pages long and split in 2 chapter...let's consider this your payment, alright?

Naruto picked up his phone, taking in a deep breath and inhaling then exhaled, reminding himself that he was prepared to accept any punishment that Gaara wanted to give him. 

It’s been only one day since he ran off after the redhead confessed his feelings to him yet for the blonde it felt like eternity. After another moment of trying to calm himself down, he dialed Gaara’s number and waited.

“Hello, Naruto-kun.” The familiar deep voice greeted him.

“Hello Gaara-kun! Errm...would you happen to be free today or whenever? I’d like to talk to you about what happened yesterday and why I behaved so rudely it’s not like you have to give me a chance or anything, I mean I get it if you don’t want to talk to me anymore.” Ranting, he knew that he needed to stop doing that.

The minute or so of silence felt like torture to the pacing blonde, biting down on the inside of his cheek.

“I am free later today. When and where would you like to meet?” The redhead asked calmly.

Naruto grinned “If it’s alright with you...would you like to come to my place? I make one mean bowl of ramen...actually it’s pretty much the only thing I know how to make.” He let out a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his neck “Is 7pm okay with you?”

“You...wish for me to visit your home?” Gaara sounded slightly surprised at the request.

“Is it weird? You don’t have to if you don’t want to! Ah...forget it if it’s burdensome.” The blonde was quick to say, rubbing the edge of his nose.

“It is not weird...I will be there at 7pm tonight.” The redhead replied.

“Good, I’ll see you at 7!” Naruto brightly said before hanging up and letting out a sigh of relief. The blonde sent his address to the redhead 710 Sage Street, Floret, NY, 01767.

The blonde looked at the time on his nightstand, it was only 10am he had 9 hours to make sure everything was perfect. He put on a fresh pair of orange sweatpants and hoodie with a black swirling design in the back, he added his running shoes and got his bottle of water then went for his morning run.

There was no point in getting down, it wouldn’t fix anything...and he wouldn’t run away, that just wasn’t the way he liked to live his life. Would Gaara forgive him for how he acted and for what he would say today? He couldn’t fall in love with someone and he certainly couldn’t have a relationship, not after what he did.

During his run he stopped to buy the ingredients he needed to make his ramen and a bottle of Aloe Vera juice which had the pulp. Once back home he put everything in the kitchen and went to shower.

The day seemed to pass by too slowly, he was glad when he saw the time and read it was 7pm. The blonde was dressed in a white shirt with black pants and an orange jacket which had black line designs.

At 7 when he heard the bell ring he quickly went to get it, the noodles were already in the boiling water. He put on a bright smile as he opened the door, staring at the redhead.

Gaara was dressed in a crimson jacket which stopped at his knees with black pants and the small gourd around his waist. What was even more striking was the fact that the redhead didn’t have his dark sunglasses on. For a moment the blonde simply stared, almost in a daze, his cheeks a bright red color. He was quite tempted to pull the redhead into a hug but stopped himself “Welcome to my humble abode, Gaara-kun.” He brightly said, opening the door even more so that the smaller male could enter.

Gaara gave Naruto a small bag which surprised the blonde “T-Thank you, there was no need to bring a present.” The blonde softly said, his sensitive nose picking up a delicious scent “....You got me coffee?! And some high class stuff too if my nose isn’t lying to me.”

“...You can smell all of that?” The redhead asked slightly surprised, walking deeper into the house. It was nicely decorated with a lot of pictures. He saw some pictures of Naruto with a white hair older man that had marking on his face, there was also some pictures of the blonde with other peoples, the jaded green eyes stopping when he saw a grinning and young Naruto with a young raven boy next to him who looked annoyed and a pinkette girl staring fondly at the raven, there was a man with silver hair and half of his face covered who looked happy.

“I did say my nose has been compared to a canine’s.” Naruto said amused “Thank you for the coffee beans!” He moved to hug the redhead then stopped himself, rubbing the back of his neck “Sorry...habit.” He murmured before heading toward the kitchen. The blonde took out the coffee from the bag, looking at the name of it “I’ve been wanting to taste this coffee, thank you!” He added it to his coffee collection and checked on the noodles.

“Would you like me to take your jacket? Also, would you like something to drink? I found some Aloe Vera juice that claims to be organic and natural.” Naruto was trying to remind himself what it was that they were meant to be talking about, he couldn’t get distracted by Gaara’s good look.

“I am fine thank you and a glass of aloe juice sounds well.” The redhead politely replied, looking at all the different pictures then stopped once more when he saw the blonde grinning with a small raven child that had red glasses hugging the blonde, a shy smile on her face, there was a few more of Naruto with the raven child in different ages from a toddler to what looked to be an elementary school student “Do you have a daughter?”

Naruto tilted his head in confusion, getting a glass and the juice “Ice?” He asked, waiting for the response before adding the juice by itself and bringing it to the redhead “Oh, she’s not my daughter...I guess you could call her my niece.”

“You have a lot of pictures...are they all your family?” Gaara asked, grabbing the glass and thanking the blonde before taking a sip of the drink.

“Not biologically...never met my biological parents, that’s them the redhead woman grinning with the blonde that’s smiling sheepishly...and that one is the only picture I have of the three of us, my mother was 5 month pregnant there...they died shortly after.”

“I am sorry...I never met my mother either, she died giving birth to me.” Gaara softly said, staring at the picture of Naruto’s parents.

“So did mine..I don’t know the details too well just that they both died protecting me. The white hair pervert there is my godfather Jiraiya, he told me a lot of the things I know about my parents...apparently I was named after the main character in his novel...and the one with the scar on his nose is my foster father and sensei Iruka...he was the first one to show me kindness growing up. “ Naruto smiled happily as he pointed out who everyone was until he made it to the one with the raven, pinkette and silver hair male.

“The raven is Sasuke-kun...That’s Sakura when she was younger and that was our teacher and Sasuke’s foster father, Kakashi-sensei.” He softly said. The blonde went back to the kitchen to check on the noodle “Do you have any pictures of your mother? You said she gave you her blood in order for you to survive.” 

“My father did not like having pictures of her in our home, I only know that she looked just like Yashamaru and Temari.” The redhead replied, looking away from all the pictures and heading toward the kitchen as well.

“I am sorry that you did not get to meet her...I am sure she must have been a very kind person since you are kind.” Naruto gave a sad smile, thinking about his own mother. “Who is Temari?” He asked, turning off the stove and grabbing two bowls then poured the ramen on each and decorated it on top with some leaves before moving to put it on the diner table.

“...Temari is my older sister…” Gaara responded after a minute, waiting for Naruto to sit down then sat down and murmured a “Thank you for the food.”

“....You have siblings?!” Why was Naruto so surprised? He was unsure.

“Yes...two older siblings. Temari and Kankuro.” Gaara replied simply.

“Oh wow…I thought you were an only child like me. Do they look like you? How old are they? Are they both redheads like you? Do you guys get along?” Naruto asked excitedly, practically bouncing off his seat. The closest that he had to siblings were Sasuke and Sakura.

“...No, Temari is a blonde and looks like our mother...Kankuro has brown hair and looks like our father. Kankuro is 2 years older than me and Temari is 3 years older.” The redhead replied, looking down at the bowl of ramen “..Get along? They both blame me for our mother’s death as does my father.”

“But it wasn’t your fault that your mother died, Gaara-kun! I am sure she wouldn’t want to see that happening and that she would rather all of you get along!” The blonde said passionately.

“But it was my fault Naruto-kun...I am not pure like you. Since the moment I was born I have been a killer. It is said that the spirit of an angered monk was entered inside of my mother against her will which led to me being born premature and ripping out of her until she bled out. She named me Gaara...a demon who can only love itself.” The redhead eyes looked unsteady, a hand moving to scratch at the red kanji on his forehead “I carved the kanji for love on my forehead to always remind myself that the only person I need to love is myself, the only person who will protect me will be myself and that I am a monster who can only survive on the blood of others.” 

This was the most that Naruto had heard Gaara talk, he got up and moved closer to the redhead then crouched down and pulled the redhead into a tight hug, his eyes watering “I am sorry that you have had to suffer so much...that you have had to carry such a massive burden for who knows how long.” Tears ran down his cheeks, feeling the cooler body against his own, wishing that he could take all that pain away.

“...Naruto?” Gaara asked in shock, stiffening at the physical contacts but did not pull away “...This is the first time someone has truly cried for me.” 

“S-Sorry, I guess I can be too emotional...but it’s not fair...why should you be treated any differently just because your mother sacrificed herself for you? She loved you enough to choose your life over her own!” Naruto sobbed out, his head resting on the smaller shoulder.

“My life over her’s?” Gaara had never heard it like that before, he was always being accused of taking her life. Hesitantly he moved an arm, awkwardly rubbing his hands up and down the broader back “Please don’t cry for me.”

Naruto felt his cheeks reddened when he felt the smaller hand on his back, a shiver running down his spine. He pulled away slightly, bright cerulean blue eyes staring at the jade ones, lips quivering slightly “I am sure she happily gave her life for yours...that you were made from the love that your mother felt toward you. Not because you are a demon that can only love itself...but because you are her precious child whom she loved and wanted to protect, believe it!” Naruto moved to cup the redhead’s pale cheeks and rest their forehead against each other, giving a warm smile.

The blonde was surprised when he felt soft lips against his own, eyes widening in shock. A tanned hand moved to cover his lips when the redhead pulled away, both of them blushing brightly. Naruto was quick to get up and take a few steps back, a troubled look on his face. 

“I like you, Naruto-kun.” The redhead repeated the same words as last night and with as much confidence.

“I...can’t be with you Gaara-kun or with anyone else...not after the sin that I committed.” Naruto replied with a pained look on his face.

“What sin?” Gaara asked softly, watching the blonde, wishing he could erase that pained look.

“You say that you are a killer...but  **_I_ ** am the real killer. I killed my best friend, Sasuke.” The blonde softly said, moving to touch his prosthetic arm. 

“It’s my fault that we got into that nasty argument in the car...and it’s my fault that he wasn’t seeing where he was going...and that we crashed. Sasuke tried to push me out and save me but it was too late. He got the full impact of the hit.” Naruto looked down at the floor “We both lost an arm...but I got off with just that while Sasuke...that bastard is still sleeping...and hasn’t been able to watch his daughter grow up. If I hadn’t been so greedy he would still be alive...I am the one that should have died that night...I am the one that should still be in the coma wasting away. I made a promise that in order to atone for my sins I would never do something foolish again like fall in love...or want someone so I am sorry Gaara-kun...I really like you..and I think under different circumstance...if things had been different...maybe I could have fallen in love with you but I am the real monster here.” Tears streamed down his cheeks, unable to look at his guest.

****

“You are only making excuses and running away, Naruto-kun.” Gaara firmly said “Your friend Sasuke would not want you living like a dead person, he would have wanted you to move on.”

****

“I am not running away! I am the one that started the argument in the car even though I knew it would lead to trouble! I keep hurting everyone around me...what if Kurama was right and I am only good at hurting those I care for?” The blonde looked at the redhead with a pained expression “What if I end up hurting you even more, Gaara? I don’t want you to die as well...I don’t want to keep losing those that I love!”

****

“You are running away...and using love as an excuse. I for one will not die so easily, Naruto-kun.” The redhead calmly said “If you do not believe me...give me a chance to show you, become my partner.” The redhead sounded so sure of himself, so calm. Naruto envied that a bit.

****

The blonde sniffed and shook his head “I can’t…I can’t risk hurting you too...I can’t Gaara...I can’t.” The blonde brokenly said, remembering all the blood sipping out and Sasuke’s dark eyes staring at him. He could still remember the weak smile his best friend gave him and the weak ‘You...idiot’ that the raven had said before closing his eyes. 

****

“You are hurting me right now, Naruto! You are making  **_this place_ ** ache again!” Gaara snapped, finally losing his cool, his hand slapping where his heart was. 

****

Naruto felt his eyes widened at the outburst and stared at the jaded eyes then wiped away his tears “...I...could you please give me a few days, Gaara-kun? Please...just a few days and I will give you a proper answer.” The blonde begged.

****

The redhead sighed softly, running a hand through his hair “You have 2 days to make up your mind.” Gaara sounded tired as he said those words and stood up, shaking his head before storming out.

****

Naruto watched Gaara leave and bit his bottom lip. He let out a shaky breath, staying in the silence for what felt like hours before going to shower.  **_‘You stupid idiot...you ruined everything like always! Nothing good can ever stay near you because you ruin everything!’_ ** He mentally scolded himself, the voice that he had named ‘Kurama’ scolding him. 

****

Once done showering he ate the cold ramen and groaned out then went to lay down, taking his sleeping pills to help him fall into a deep slumber.

****

Naruto woke up to the sound of a familiar ringtone “Sakura...did something happen?” 

****

“That’s what I would like to ask you, Naruto!” His best friend exclaimed “I was about to head over to yours...I’ve been calling you since yesterday! We were meant to discuss your appointment to check your arm!” She snapped “What happened?”

****

Naruto yawned, feeling confused and checked his phone then felt his eyes widened...he’s been asleep literally for a whole day!”Crap, I am sorry Sakura...I tried to take a nap but apparently slept for a whole day instead.” He said feeling guilty.

****

“You...are sleeping all day again? What happened, Naruto...did you get a relapse?” Sakura’s voice was filled with worry.

****

“I am fine!! I just...I won’t betray Sasuke or you.” The blonde sadly said.

****

“Betray? What are you talking about, Naru?” The pinkette worriedly asked.

****

“It’s my fault that Sarada and you aren’t with Sasuke right now...the least I can do is dedicate my life to making sure that the two of you are taken care of...I won’t date anyone...I won’t let anything or anyone distract me from my duty to you.” The blonde softly said.

****

“Oh Naruto...Sasuke wouldn’t have wanted you to be like this... **I** don’t want you to be like this. I told you already...what happened wasn’t your fault, the road was slippery and Sasuke-kun lost control...there was nothing you could have done. He wouldn’t be happy knowing that you are still torturing yourself over that. He’d want for you to be happy, if there is someone that you like, go for it.” The pinkette gently said, voice sounding choked up “I hate the thought of you being alone...who is the person that you like, tell me.” She ordered.

****

Naruto hesitated then told Sakura about Gaara, about how he looks like a delicate porcelain doll but has a really deep and hoarse voice...about how kind the redhead is and how innocent as well. “He asked me to be his partner...but I can’t do that to Sasuke and you.” The blonde softly said.

****

“Oh Naruto...please give him a chance..honestly I think dating will do you a world of good and he sounds like he’s perfect for you. When you have a chance...bring him over, I would love to meet him.” She gently said “I need to go and pick up Sarada from her martial art class...but you listen to me and give that boy a chance...do it for Sasuke and for me, please.” With that she murmured her departure and hung up.

****

Naruto sighed, letting out a groan while thinking about his options and how Gaara made him feel. He dialed Gaara’s number and waited until the redhead picked up.

****

“Hello, Naruto-kun.” Gaara sounded exhausted.

****

“Hello, Gaara-kun...I have made up my mind.” The blonde softly said “If...you’ll have me...if it’s really alright with you, I’d like to give us a try...all I ask is for us to take things slow. Truth is I haven’t dated in a really long time...and I really like you. I like the way you snort when you think I’ve said something funny...the way your jade green eyes make me think of glass...how you seem to be curious about everything and how nice you are...I like hearing your voice and feeling your smaller body against mine when I hug you.” Somehow it ended up turning into a really long confession, his cheeks bright red and his heart still feeling conflicted but he couldn’t keep sulking.

****

“....Gaara-kun? Hello?” The blonde worriedly asked after about two minutes of silence.

****

“You are accepting to be with me?” Gaara slowly asked.

****

“Errmm...ah...yes...to try things out!” The blonde replied flustered.

****

“Thank you, Naruto-kun.” The voice sounded more gentle and made Naruto feel warm.

****

“You shouldn’t thank me...I should be the one to do that...I can’t promise that our relationship will be perfect...but I’d like to try...I want to be able to tell my friends that you are mine...to feel our hands against each other and make you laugh again...but most importantly I want to show you that you aren’t a monster capable of loving only itself...you are Gaara...you are my Shukaku.” This was so embarrassing, the blonde could feel his ears turning bright red.

****

A snort was heard “I have to finish up some work...but will you be free during the weekend?” Gaara asked softly.

****

“H-Hai, I’ll see you during the weekend then!” Naruto brightly said and grinned, wondering what type of job Gaara did.

****

“Goodnight, Naruto-kun.” The redhead murmured.

****

“Goodnight, Gaara-kun...sweet dreams.” Naruto softly responded then hung up and hugged the phone to his chest.

**_  
‘It’s okay for me to try again...Sakura said it’s okay...so why do I feel so guilty?’ Naruto mentally wondered._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I ended up combining ch9 and 10 into one big long one, the next ch11 will also be a long-ish, depending how many chapters I manage to write tomorrow I might keep just posting them. Right now I am just going over some of the old chapter and fixing them as well. Also, I need me a friend like Sakura who will just be like "Go and get the man/ woman! Forget about everything else!" 
> 
> Anyways! Next chapter is the first part of their date. As always, please let me know what you think of it and any constructive feedback you'd like to give. Kudos are also adored as are bookmarks.


	10. ch10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First part of Gaara and Naruto's first date.

_**“Dear Kyuubi,** _

_**I think I might be broken...everyone around me is having sex and talking about how great it is...but I just don’t feel anything, it feels more like a chore. Is there something wrong with me? Am I just doing it wrong like my parents and friends say?** _

**-BroknLost-**

* * *

_**Dear BroknLost,** _

_**You are not broken at all nor are you wrong...there is no ‘right’ way to have sex. Someone once told me that sex is like a ritual where partners exchange energy and worship each other body, it shouldn’t have to feel like a chore.** _

_**With that said...if you are not interested in sex, that’s perfectly fine as well! Perhaps you truly haven’t found the right person to share that experience with or perhaps you are asexual. One of my close friends told me about it, asexuality is lacking an interest in sex but being interested in someone romantically. It’s a sexual orientation just like bisexuality, homosexuality and all the rest that are out there.** _

_**You are not broken...just have patience with yourself. Thank you for reaching out to me and do let me know how things go!** _

**XoXo Kyuubi XoXo** _**”** _

The blonde quickly typed, moving to take a sip of his new coffee, the one that the redhead got him. 

“Ow..Ow..hurts!” He hissed as he burned himself again and stuck his tongue out. It’s been a few days since the whole confession thing and the blonde was still blushing. He kept reminding himself that it was okay for him to accept Gaara’s feeling, that Sasuke wouldn’t be furious with him over it...but it was hard. 

He went through the rest of the letters then checked his schedule. Naruto needed to buy his plane ticket to go and visit Sakura in two month’s time, his check-up was coming up, it also gave the tan a chance to see his sleeping best friend.

His mind went to the redhead, Sakura had requested to meet Gaara...but would it be too soon? Maybe they were rushing things and Gaara would get fed up...or what if there was another accident and this time it was Gaara who got hurt? Naruto wanted to call the redhead, to hear his voice and make sure that the smaller male was safe...but he didn’t want to be a burden, the redhead had said that he would be busy with work.

Once more the tan hand moved to grab the fox mug, taking a sip of the honey tasting coffee, letting out a soft sigh. “He’s fine...Gaara is fine..I am being dramatic again...I am being stupid.” He mumbled to himself. 

Naruto knew that he should call Shikamaru...that he should be talking about the symptoms returning but he didn’t want to appear as weak...and he didn’t want to complain when there were people much worse off than him. There was nothing worth complaining about, the feeling of dread that filled his body would leave and he would be fine.

He went through the rest of the week with that feeling of dread increasing, refusing to fall asleep. Everytime his eyes close he would see those familiar dark ones staring at him lifelessly, he would hear Sasuke’s angry voice accusing him of moving on...or see those beautiful Jaded green eyes staring blankly at him, Gaara’s body covered in blood.

Naruto was grateful when Saturday came along and Gaara called him to say where they would be meeting and at what time. The blonde was quick to shower, trying to fix his spiky hair even though he knew it was a losing battle. He put on a button down long sleeve orange shirt and dark blue jeans that he knew showed off his powerful legs and nice ass. He smiled at himself in the mirror, seeing his shining white teeth then added just a bit of cologne, a citrusy scent. It had been a gift from Sakura for his birthday ever since he was in high school.

Naruto had agreed to meet at the restaurant, he drove his mini-cooper to the posher part of town. The restaurant was a white brick building which was right by the lake. A valet parker came to take his car away, it was all quite fancy and the blonde suddenly wondered if he was dressed properly for the occasion. He went toward the host and gave his charming smile “Hello Lisa, I was told to mention the reservation under Subaku-No?” 

“....Do you mean  **Sabaku-** No?” The posh looking host asked with a slight raised eyebrow, not seeming impressed by the blonde.

“Oh yeah! Haha...Sabaku-No Gaara I believe. He’s got really bright red hair and is pale like a porcelain doll.” Naruto excitedly said, rubbing the back of his neck.

“...Hmm…” The host looked through the list “And who may you be,  _ Sir? _ ” She asked, looking at his outfit with slight distaste. 

The blonde felt slightly uncomfortable, he parted his lips to say his name and got a call from Gaara “Oh...I am right at the front. Did you put the reservation under Sabaku-No Gaara?”The blonde asked.

“Yes...is there a problem? I will go and get you.” Gaara calmly replied.

“N-No it’s fine! Everything is perfectly fine, I think I might have gotten the dress code wrong is all.” The blonde said, looking at the host who was starting to look annoyed.

“I will be there in a minute.” With that, the redhead hung up.

“Sorry, he’ll be here in a minute.” Naruto sheepishly said, trying not to feel like a child that was being secretly scolded by a teacher.

“Yes, I am sure he will.” The Hostess said with that look of slight distaste. 

They waited silently for a whole minute until he saw the familiar red hair and jaded eyes, the blonde smiled brightly “Hello, Gaara-kun.” He warmly greeted, feeling his heartbeat speed up. The redhead was wearing a button down dark red jacket that looked almost brown, he had on black pants and the small gourd around his waist.

“Hello Naruto-kun...is there a problem?” The redhead asked, his voice having a slight edge to it.

The hostess stiffened and turned pale “Oh no...of course not Mr. Suna...we were just getting ready to lead your...friend...toward the VVIP room. Everything is perfectly fine, no need to worry or get angry, really...lovely friend you have Mr. Suna!” There was a slight panic in her voice, giving Naruto a pleading look.

Suna sounded familiar to the blonde but he couldn’t remember why. He didn’t understand why the hostess looked so terrified “Everything is fine Gaara-kun, promise! We were just having a nice chat, you know how scatterbrain I can be.” Naruto brightly said, moving past the hostess and toward the redhead “I am sorry...I got the reservation name confused and Lisa here was helping me.”

“...Very Well…” The redhead gave one more cold look to the hostess who still looked petrified then Naruto and Gaara went toward the private room that the redhead had reserved. It kept them from prying eyes.

“Suna...Suna...why do I feel like I’ve heard that name before.” The blonde murmured “I thought Sabaku-No was your surname, am I wrong?” Naruto blushed when Gaara pulled the seat out for him and waited for him to sit down then went to sit across from him.

The room was decorated quite elegantly, they were sat in a round table with a rose in the middle, a black menu on their right side and a glass of water.

“Sabaku-No Gaara is my alias...my real name is Suna-No Gaara but it can be...inconvenient.” The smaller male replied.

“Gaara of the Sand….I like how it sounds.”Naruto brightly said and grinned then started to laugh as he remembered the ringtone he had for the redhead.

“What is so amusing, Naruto-kun?” The redhead tilted his head slightly.

“Haha...oh...no...its stupid..haha.” The blonde gasped out, trying to cover his mouth but couldn’t stop laughing.

“What is it?” The redhead asked once more.

“O-Oh...fine..give me a sec...haha...wait..haha.” Naruto tried to calm himself down then blushed brightly “Errmm...promise not to laugh too much, okay?” 

“...Laugh?” Naruto was sure that if Gaara had eyebrows one of them would have been raised right now.

“Hey, I’ve made you laugh before!” The blonde whined and pouted, then looked down “....I may have the song **‘Mr Sandman’** as your ringtone...and your surname is _‘Sand’_ and you are a _man_ so...yeah...you see?” Naruto squirmed and tried not to look at Gaara. He felt his cheeks redden when he heard the familiar, quiet laugh, his cerulean blue eyes quickly turning to his partner “See, I told you that I’d make you laugh!” Naruto was quick to point out and pout.

“I am unsure what song that is...but your logic is amusing.” Gaara replied, his face softening slightly and a hint of a smile on his face.

Naruto held on to his chest, feeling his heartbeat speed up so quickly that he swore his heart would fly away any second now. “....One of these days you are going to give me a heart attack, it really should be a crime to be as perfect as you...I don’t think my heart will be able to take it in the long term.” Naruto mumbled, looking away. 

The writer was met with silence, turning to see his partner staring at him with what looked to be gentleness and shock “...I am not perfect, Naruto-kun, you saw that for yourself.” 

“That’s bullshi-” The blonde stopped as the waiter came with some appetizer and bowed “Would you like to order something, Sir?” The waiter asked Naruto.

“Oh crap...I forgot to look at the menu!” Naruto quickly opened it, trying to see prices but there was none, just different food “I...errmm...haven’t heard about most of these...is there something you recommend, Gaara-kun?” 

“Do you have a food allergy?” Gaara asked, his face and voice back to that aloof look that the blonde knew too well.

“Nope, I am as healthy as a horse...or was it as healthy as a cow? I can’t remember the saying right now...but I am super healthy!” The blonde brightly replied “No food allergies here!” 

“Hmm...bring a second order of what I am having and a vase of Cactus Wine.” Gaara ordered, the waiter writing it down and bowing.

“I will bring the vase right away, Sir...if you will excuse me.” The waiter excused himself and left.

“Cactus Wine? There’s such a thing?” Naruto asked in awe “How is it made?” He curiously asked, giving the redhead his full attention.

“It is made using the Prickly Pear Cactus for the base and fermenting it. Vodka can also be made using cactus.” Gaara explained.

“Oh wow...I didn’t know that. You sure know a lot about cactus, Gaara-kun! It’s amazing!” Naruto gushed, seeing the waiter return rather quickly with an elegant looking brown vase and two wine glasses. Their drink was poured and the rest was left in a medal table.

“I am...quite terrible with alcohol.” Naruto warned, looking at the beautiful crimson color of it. He took a sniff, it had a sweet scent then took a sip and another “O-Oh wow...it tastes like Grape at first and then like pear! This is delicious!” Naruto practically moaned out, finishing the half glass of the red liquid in record time.

The redhead swirled his glass, watching the blonde drink and snorted before taking a sip of it “It has only 2% alcohol...but you should still slow down. I am glad that you like it.” 

“Sorry, got a bit carried away, can I have more?” The blonde asked excitedly “It tastes really good, I thought it would have a bland flavor...or be very bitter but it’s not.” He looked at the appetizers, tilting his head then went to grab what looked to be a brown-ish piece of meat that had a long shape “Mmm, what is this?” He asked, looking quite pleased.

“That is Salted Tongue, it is one of my favorite things to eat.” Gaara responded, a gentle smile on his face.

“.....T-T-Tongue? This is a tongue?” Naruto asked shocked, trying to get his heart to slow down. When Gaara smiled his whole face transformed, making him appear younger and more gentle.

“Oxtail tongue.” Gaara clarified, sounding slightly amused.

Naruto poured himself more wine and drank about half of it “Oh..um...it’s interesting.” He felt guilty for the poor Ox but found himself taking another bite, not one to waste food “Won’t you have some?I feel bad being the only one eating.”

Gaara let out another snort, shaking his head. His cheeks reddened when Naruto offered him a bite of the piece he just had. The redhead hesitated only for a second before leaning forward and taking a bite of it. They just had an indirect kiss...didn’t they?

“What else do you like, Gaara-kun?” Naruto asked, finishing the piece, not seeming to realize that they just shared an indirect kiss.

“The chicken gizzard is also my favorite.” The redhead replied, offering Naruto a bite. 

The blonde moved forward and took a bite, letting out another moaning sound that made the redhead blush brightly. “Oh wow...what is a gizzard? That tastes really good as well...there’s a bit of a kick to it at the end, isn’t there? Maybe some chili pepper.” 

“It’s part of the Chicken’s stomach and why they do not need teeth...it grinds the food down when it is digested.” Gaara explained, feeding Naruto the rest of the piece.

“It’s delicious!” The blonde happily said, moving to take some more and drink his wine.

* * *

**_tbc_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woot, chapter 10!!! My OCD feels better now that its in the double digit and its a perfect 1 again. 
> 
> I feel like Naruto would be the type to laugh at dad jokes and make them as well that why I can't help but laugh every time I read his explanation of his ringtone to Gaara "Mr Sandman....your last name is Sand and you are a man, get it?" No, Naru...no one else gets it but those of us with a terrible sense of humor haha.
> 
> Next chapter will be the second part of their date you'll also get to see a more vulnerable side of Naruto. This story is officially ahead of my other one Goodbye Kiss.
> 
> As always, please Read, Comment, Bookmark and leave Kudos. They let me know that you guys are enjoying it and gives me motivation to continue. Before I forget, the ringtone Naruto uses is the song Mr Sandman by The Chordettes, all right belongs to them. 
> 
> For those that may be reading my other story 'Goodbye Kiss' I am sooo sorry, I have a chapter finished and I know where the story needs to go but the words are just meeting my expectations as a perfectionist...the story is still on hiatus but it won't be canceled!


	11. Ch11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second part of their date, we also find out just how low Naruto's alcohol tolerance is!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Friday, guys!  
> First off, I'd like to thank Angel_from_unknown (I really like your name, I love angels my favorite ones are Archangel Michael & Gabriel!) for their bookmark.
> 
> Thanks to Purpleace16, Xazz_ewn, posideonsneptune and those under guests for leaving me kudos, it means a lot to me ^_^
> 
> If I've forgotten to mention you or haven't answer your comment do let me know, I can be quite scatterbrained sometimes.

The rest of their food was brought, it was small quantities in fancy looking plates and beautifully decorated. “Isn’t this...a bit expensive, Gaara-kun? I don’t want you spending a lot of money on me...I can eat anything, really!”

“It is not expensive, enjoy the food...I am glad you are enjoying yourself.” The redhead gave Naruto a gentle smile, moving to eat as well.

Naruto ended up tasting some lizards, Gazelle roasted meat and rabbit soup. The two of them managed to go through a few vases of cactus wine, Naruto’s cheeks slightly flushed. The blonde was feeling tipsy even though it wasn’t that much alcohol.

“Oh...I think I might be just a **tiny** bit drunk...just a little.” The blonde giggled.

“You are drunk with 4 vase?” Gaara asked, sounding slightly amused.

“Shhhhh Gaara-kun, you can’t say it outloud...Tis not my fault I am lightweight...tis your fault...you and...and your pretty face! Also, why are ya so nice? You shouldn’t be so nice ya know?” The blonde gave a nod with a very serious look on his face “You’re gonna make my heart explode...Sasuke-kun used to make me feel like that but he said it was wrong for two guys to be together...for **_us_ **to be together...he needed to restore the Uchiha clan...that’s what we were arguing about when it happened, ya know? 

I was mad at him for choosing his clan name over me...I screamed at him that I loved him and that I should be enough...that if he couldn’t love me back I would leave and disappear...but he told me that he couldn’t choose me...that I could never understand because I never knew my family.” Naruto poured himself more of the wine and drank it quickly “So I told him that he was a selfish asshole and that I was sorry for falling in love with him...and then we crashed. 

He tried to push me out of the car...to shield me from the impact...after the accident I found out that Sakura was pregnant with his child...that he was going to be a father and I took that away from him.” Naruto’s eyes were glazed over as he remembered “It’s been 8 years...and he still hasn’t woken up.

“It wasn’t your fault, Naruto-kun...you did not make the crash happen...and I will not get hurt by being with you.” Gaara calmly said, moving to take the wine away.

The redhead got up from his chair, helping Naruto up. The truth was that he was terrible at comforting others. The redhead tried not to stiffened as he was suddenly hugged tightly, their body pressed against each other. The half foot difference was clearly visible to him right now.

“....I am scared of liking you this much...even though we haven’t known each other for long...it feels like I’ve known you for eternity.” Naruto murmured “I don’t want to lose you as well.” 

Gaara took in the familiar citrusy scent that came from the tanned male, he awkwardly hugged back, feeling his cheek get kissed “You won’t lose me Naruto...I promise.” He let the blonde calm down, then went with his partner to pay the bill, not letting Naruto see the price. 

Once they were out of the restaurant, Gaara led Naruto toward a small Asian cafe and got him Vietnamese coffee. It was bitter but it would make the blonde sober up. Gaara tried not to focus on their palm pressing against each other, glancing at the suddenly quiet blonde but unsure what else to say.

“Would you like to go home?” The redhead quietly asked.

The blonde shook his hand, squeezing the smaller hand as they walked near the lake “No...I don’t want to be alone right now...and I like spending time with you.” Naruto softly replied, taking another sip of the bitter coffee and making a face. 

“Hm.” They went back to quietly walking together, the blonde tugging at the redhead so that they would sit at the wooden bench by the lake.

The blonde kept quietly drinking his coffee then smiled warmly “Thank you for staying with me Gaara-kun...I know I can be quite selfish and needy.” The blonde softly said, moving to rest his head on the smaller shoulder.

“You are not selfish or needy Naruto-kun...you are one of the kindest and selfless people I have ever met.” Gaara softly replied, trying to calm down his own quickening heartbeat. They were so close to each other, this has been the most he’s been touched in his life.

“I am really glad I met you...I am so happy.” The blonde sleepily said before falling asleep, nuzzling his nose against the pale neck, taking in the earthy and almost salty scent that came from the redhead. 

“Naruto-kun?” The redhead asked after a few minutes of silence, only to realize that the blonde had fallen asleep. He turned to look at the taller male, moving to run his fingers through the blonde locks, hearing a pleased sound coming from his partner’s lips. 

* * *

When Naruto woke up he was in an unknown bed with silky sheets and an earthy scent in the room. He groaned out, feeling a splitting headache, eyes widening when he realized that he wasn’t wearing the same clothes as last night...he was dressed in a crimson shirt that was a bit small on him, when he looked underneath the cover he let out a sigh of relief when he saw he at least had his bright green boxers on which had little bowls of ramen designs on it.

Wait...how did he end up in this room?! And where were his clothes?! He looked at the small digital clock on the nightstand, it read 4:02am. The blonde quickly got up, the splitting headache hurting even more which made him groan out louder, he also noticed that his prosthetic arm was visible along with the scars on his upper arm. 

He got out of the bedroom, looking around the nice looking living room, it was decorated simply, the light low, he headed toward the glass door where he saw a balcony then headed toward it and blinked when he saw Gaara looking up at the moon. The redhead was dressed in a tight fitted black shirt and black sweatpants which had S design all over it.

“You are awake...did you sleep well?” Gaara asked without looking at him.

Naruto blushed brightly, standing by the door “Yes, thank you.” He replied “Ano...where are my clothes and how did I get here? Is this your home?” 

“You don’t remember what happened?” The redhead asked, this time turning to look at the blonde.

Naruto stared at Gaara, fingers itching to touch him but refrained for now. He tried to remember what happened...they ate some delicious food...he got drunk and...oh no. His eyes widened as he slowly started to remember, moving to cover his face. The blonde heard a familiar snorting sound.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear Gaara is perfect boyfriend material, why can't I find a Gaara in real life? 
> 
> I got sick a few days ago (nothing serious just severe migraines, I am used to it!) and I decided to watch Your lie in April...worst mistake ever. It was so good but so sad, now my eyes are all puffy and my head hurts even more! On the positive side, it got me so fired up that I was able to fix 6 chapters and write 3 brand new ones. 
> 
> As of right now I've got 30 chapters written but the story will be much longer than that, especially with the slow pace (I am sorry, blame Gaara, I tried to speed some stuff up and whenever I tried writing his part he wouldn't budge until I slowed things down!) 
> 
> Okay, done ranting. I'll be posting ch12 right away.
> 
> As always, please read, leave kudos, bookmark and feedback it lets me know that you guys are enjoying this and if you aren't send me back some constructive feedback.
> 
> -Y-


	12. ch12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaara & Naruto have some affectionate side, things get a bit heated up.The ghost of Sasuke strikes again.

**_Naruto stared at Gaara, fingers itching to touch him but refrained for now. He tried to remember what happened...they ate some delicious food...he got drunk and...oh no. His eyes widened as he slowly started to remember, moving to cover his face. The blonde heard a familiar snorting sound._ **

**_=============_ **

“How much do you remember?” Gaara asked, moving closer.

Naruto kept his face hidden and mumbled something then slowly brought his hands down “....I talked about Sasuke to you...then you got me some Vietnamese coffee...we walked toward the lake...and I fell asleep.” Naruto mumbled with bright red cheeks, unable to look at the redhead.

“Anything else?” The redhead asked, looking at the embarrassed blonde.

Naruto tried remembering, it was a blur. He shook his head “How did we get here...and where are my clothes? Did we...did I?” The blonde wasn’t sure how to ask if they had sex or if Naruto jumped Gaara. He squirmed, feeling that stare on him.

“We did not have sexual intercourse if that is what you are wondering, Naruto-kun.” Gaara calmly said.

Naruto found himself laughing, looking at Gaara “Sexual intercourse? Really, Gaara-kun?” He giggled at the choice of word, all anxiety leaving him.

“What is so amusing? We did not have sexual intercourse, I promise.” Gaara replied, tilting his head slightly.

Naruto shook his head and kept giggling then moved to hug the redhead “You sound like my high school sex ed teacher...most people would just call it sex, Gaara-kun.” Naruto said with an amused tone, letting his nose nuzzle the pale neck “You smell really nice...like the earth..mmm and a bit salty it makes me think of the ocean.” The blonde murmured.

Gaara squirmed slightly, feeling his cheeks redden “Are you still drunk, Naruto-kun?” The redhead murmured.

“I don’t think so...why?” Naruto softly asked, closing his eyes then remembered where they were “I did warn you that I am overly affectionate and physical...and your body fits perfectly against mine, it’s not my fault, it’s yours!” 

A snort left the redhead lips “You did warn me.” Gaara simply replied “You also get very affectionate when you are drunk, did you know that?” There was a hint of amusement.

“....What did I do, Gaara-kun?” The blonde asked, eyes wide. He shivered as the cool breeze hit them “Can we continue this conversation inside? I am not sure your neighbors would enjoy seeing me in my boxers.”

“Hm.” The redhead only agreed because he wanted to be the only one to see Naruto in his boxer. He was dragged to the couch where the blonde proceeded to pull him toward the tan legs. Gaara tried not to squirm and pull away, this was something he would need to get used to...physical affection.

“Your body is so cool, I swear you were made to be cuddled!” Naruto said “Now, what did I do while I was drunk?” He knew that he could get quite handsy.

“Aside from kissing me...and trying to get me undressed?” Gaara casually asked.

“I-I tried to get you undressed?” Naruto asked in shock, feeling his ears turn red.

“Hm.” Was all the redhead said.

“....I-I-Is that all?” Naruto quietly asked.

“You also proceeded to throw up all over both of us just as you were about to kiss me.” Gaara added calmly, eyes lit up with amusement.

“....Oh my gods, I am sooo sorry, Gaara-kun! I swear I am not normally like that!” The blonde said horrified, hiding his face using the redhead’s pale neck.

“So you don’t normally start singing ‘Mr Sandman’ either, hm?” The redhead was highly enjoying this.

“Oh no.” Naruto said mortified “I didn’t!” 

“I believe you said **_‘Mr Sandman bring me a Gaara’_ **among other things.” A soft laugh escaped the redhead’s lips, remembering the drunk Naruto.

“It’s not funny Gaara-kun! It’s terrible...it sounds terrible.” The blonde whined, holding on tighter to the smaller body, kissing Gaara’s cheek sweetly “Fine, you can dump me right now! I can be exiled to the middle of nowhere and live the life of one of those nuns or whatever! Forever the world will know the embarrassing tale of Naruto Uzumaki...the idiot who threw up on his date!” 

The redhead shivered and squirmed, feeling the warm lips against his pale skin. “I do not mind...I thought it was cute.” The redhead said.

“Gaara-kun you are too good to me!” The blonde whined, letting their cheeks rub against each other “Honestly, you really are...so how did I end up with new clothes and how come my mouth doesn’t taste like vomit?”

“...Your clothes were dirty so I had to remove them...and you smelled of vomit so I had you take a bath.” The redhead softly said.

Naruto felt his cheeks turn bright red “Y-Y-You saw me naked!”

“I kept the light low, all I saw was the outline...but I was unsure if your prosthetic arm could get wet or not so I kept it outside the bath while you got cleaned up then you got dressed in my shirt and your boxer...and I had you brush your teeth with a spare toothbrush I had.” The redhead explained, cheeks a bright red color.

The blonde stayed quiet for a bit, trying hard to remember but only got glimpses. “...It can get wet. Thank you for everything, Gaara-kun.” He softly said.

“There is no need to thank me.” The redhead replied, trying to stop his squirming, he was getting overwhelmed with the touches even though it was something so simple.

“Huh...Gaara-kun your face looks quite flushed, are you catching a fever?” The blonde asked, moving to turn the redhead’s face and press their forehead against each other “...It feels a bit warm, maybe you should lay down.” He murmured.

“I am okay...your lips tickles.” Gaara quietly replied, biting his bottom lip.

“S-Sorry.” Naruto mumbled, pulling away slightly.

“I don’t mind...it feels nice. Is this what Uncle Yashamaru was talking about? That medicine for the heart?” Gaara softly asked, holding on to his chest. “For a long time...this part here ache and nothing I did helped...but you make it feel better...you make me feel warm.” 

Naruto tried to stop blushing, remember the ache in his heart when he had been younger and alone...then when it came back after the accident when Sakura didn’t talk to him and he was alone. “Affection? We all need it...this is something important to what is called human nature. Even monkeys and apes won’t last long if they are rejected at birth and don’t receive affection.” Naruto explained, his fingers wrapping around the red locks. He stared at the beautiful glass looking eyes, the dark rings surrounding it and then pressed their lips against each other, his eyes closing. Naruto was happy when he felt cooler lips press back, it was a simple kiss but it made the blonde feel warm.

A part of him felt guilty for feeling this happy, as if he was betraying Sasuke by moving on...by liking someone else. He pulled away from the kiss, resting their forehead against each other “You are not some selfish monster that deserves to be alone.” Naruto was unsure if he was saying that for Gaara’s benefit or his own. 

“Naruto-kun?” The deep voice made a warmth spread throughout Naruto’s body.

“Sorry, I am just being sentimental...ignore it.” The blonde said with a soft smile, kissing the pale cheek. 

“I do not think you are being sentimental...and what is wrong if you are?” Gaara asked, turning so that he was facing the blonde and straddling him “You are fine just the way you are Naruto-kun...you are my light.” 

Naruto felt his whole face turn bright red, staring at the beautifully pale face, his fingers running through the spiky, crimson locks then cupped the smaller cheek and rested their forehead against each other “I should be the one saying those words...you are the one that has become my light.” Naruto murmured, rubbing their nose against each other. “If I am being too affectionate or physical...just let me know, okay? I don’t want you to ever do something you are not comfortable with just because you’d think it would make me happy.”

“...If it’s Naruto-kun touching me then it’s fine.” Gaara practically whispered, pressing their lips against each other.

The blonde savored the kiss, he tried to memorize the feeling of their lips against each other, the salty yet earthy scent that seemed to belong to Gaara and the way their body seemed to feel against each other. Naruto tried not to let his mind go to the gutter, imagining a pale body, wondering just how hairless Gaara was, how would it feel if they...if they...it was embarrassing to even think about it!

_**“It’s wrong for two guys to be together, Naruto...just forget what happened last time, it was a mistake!”** _The blonde could hear Sasuke’s voice clearly, for a moment he swore that he saw the raven and suddenly the massive guilt came back. 

Naruto pulled away from their kiss, he searched Gaara’s face and held him tightly, body shaking at the memories. He wished that he wasn’t like this, there was no reason for him to feel like this...he should be happy...he **was** happy.

“What’s wrong, Naruto-kun?” Gaara’s voice had a hint of worry to it.

The blonde shook his head and smiled brightly “Nothing is wrong...I am just happy...really happy.” He would keep repeating those words to himself until it became true.

“You seem sad.” The smaller male pointed out, pale fingers moving to run through the spiky blonde locks.

“I do?” Naruto softly asked and shook his head “I am not sad, I am perfectly fine! Actually I am more than fine thanks to you.” The blonde brightly said, rubbing their cheeks against each other. He kissed Gaara more desperately, pulling the smaller body closer to his own, a groan escaping his lips.

Gaara kissed back slowly, almost awkwardly. He could feel that the blonde needed this closeness right now yet he could not understand what brought the change in mood. The redhead felt the warmer lips move toward his neck and kiss down it. The lips left a tingling sensation behind, he could feel warm hands sliding underneath his shirt and touch his pale skin.

The redhead put a hand firmly on the taller male’s chest and pulled away “Naruto-kun...stop.” The voice came out slightly breathless, Gaara squirming above Naruto.

The blonde stopped, looking at the redhead “You...don’t want to?” He softly asked.

“....Not like this...not now when you are clearly not here with me. Your mind is elsewhere.” The redhead replied, moving to get up “You wanted to take things slowly...remember?”

Naruto stared quietly, watching the redhead pull away from him “I...should go.” He’s just made a complete idiot of himself again. He stood up, cheeks bright red and looking embarrassed.

“Stay...right now you are not in the best mind to drive. You can sleep in my bed.” Gaara calmly replied, looking at his partner. There was a deep sadness past those cerulean blue eyes. The redhead wondered if he would always have to compete with Sasuke.

The tan male shook his head “I should go...I don’t want to become a burden to you, Gaara-kun. I just need to think for a bit.” He softly said.

“You could never be a burden to me, Naruto-kun...now stay.” The redhead hesitated before moving to wrap their fingers against each other, by the texture he could feel it was the prosthetic one. The redhead led the blonde back to the room and helped him get on the bed, tugging him in. 

When Gaara moved to walk away he was pulled back by Naruto, feeling the blonde pull him to the bed and hug him. “....Cuddle with me?” The blonde softly asked, almost pleading.

Gaara searched Naruto’s face then nodded, getting underneath the cover as well, feeling the tanned body pressed against his. The blonde nuzzled the pale neck and sighed softly then slowly dozed off. The redhead somehow ended up dozing off as well, the scent of citrus surrounding him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One day the ghost of Sasuke will stop getting in the way of these two! Lol 'Mr Sandman bring me a Gaara' I wish! Wait until you guys find out what ringtone Naruto has for Sasuke, I still have the song stuck in my head.
> 
> Next chapter is a cute and domestic one, Gaara also realizes that there is a whole past he doesn't know about Naruto and wonders if he'll always have to compete with the ghost of Sasuke.
> 
> Does anyone know any good Gaara fanfic I could read here? I love Gaara x Lee, Gaara x Naruto fanfics. Thanks in advance!
> 
> As always, thanks for reading^-^ Please leave kudos, bookmark and leave some feedback. It lets me know I am doing a good job and that you are enjoying it. 
> 
> Until next time.
> 
> -Y-


	13. ch13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto gets to see more of Gaara's place. Gaara wonders if he'll always have to compete against the ghost of Sasuke.

Cerulean blue eyes slowly opened, staring at the pale face next to him, cheeks reddening when he saw the Jaded green eyes staring back at him. A small yawn escaped the blonde’s lips, covering his mouth. 

“How long have I been sleeping for?” He sleepily asked, pressing their body closer, he wasn’t ready to move just yet “Did you sleep?”

“You slept for 4 hours.” Gaara replied, giving a small nod. It felt odd waking up with someone next to him...it felt odd to even sleep for as long as he did and without the nightmares that tended to follow. The last thing the redhead had remembered was Naruto’s body against his own and then there had been a blissful darkness.

“4? That sounds about right.” The blonde sleepily mumbled, closing his eyes again and going quiet. Naruto took in the scent of something earthy and salty, associating it with his partner by now. He honestly wished that he could stay like this forever, a certain peace washing through his body.

Cerulean blue eyes opened for a second time, one of his legs was on top of the smaller body as was one of his arms, his face pressed against the pale neck “Did I fall asleep again?” He sleepily asked, retreating his limbs “Sorry, I forgot that I tend to take up a lot of space when I sleep.” 

“Yes, you slept for two more hours.” Gaara responded, a red mark on his face that looked suspiciously like a hand “It’s fine, I do not mind.” 

“Gaara-kun...what happened to your face?” The blonde asked surprise, moving to sit up slightly.

“....You don’t remember?” The redhead tilted his head, looking slightly amused.

“....What did I do now?” The blonde looked worried, trying to remember but the last thing he could recall was waking up to see Jaded green eyes staring back at him.

“I tried to get up but you turned and wrapped yourself around me...then you said something about ramen, your hand slapping my face.” Gaara explained with amused eyes.

Naruto proceeded to grab a pillow and cover his face, his ears turning red as he groaned out. “So that was the spicy ramen I was dreaming about.” He mumbled in the pillow, the words coming out muffled. The tan male felt the bed shift and looked up, watching Gaara get out of the bed. 

“I can certainly say there is never a boring moment with you, Naruto-kun.” The paler male replied, a gentle look on his face.

Naruto stared at his partner, a warm smile on his face “Well, I aim to please.” The guilt that hit him last night seems to be gone, there was now a certain peace washing over his body. He moved to get out of the bed as well, stretching out like a feline and yawning.

“Would you like some coffee? I believe I still have some in my cabinet.” Gaara murmured, heading toward his door.

The room was dark even though the clock read 14:30, cerulean blue eyes looked around, seeing the drape curtains, eyes perking up when he saw a small frame picture, walking toward it “....Is that you, Gaara-kun?” He asked with a grin, seeing the shy young boy who was hugging a teddy bear, next to him was a young man with a gentle smile and sandy blonde hair, a bandage wrapped around his head “Who is that next to you?”

The redhead looked at the picture in his nightstand, it was one of the few pictures he had of his uncle and him “That is uncle Yashamaru.” He simply replied, glancing away from it.

“He seems like a really nice and warm person.” Naruto softly said, turning to grin at his partner “I guess your Yashamaru was like my Iruka-sensei, huh?” 

“...Iruka-sensei?” The redhead asked, a slight questioning tone.

“Hai, Iruka-sensei was the first person to recognize me...he told me that I could become anyone I wanted and didn’t treat me like a monster...eventually he ended up adopting me and becoming my adoptive father.” Naruto happily replied, straightening up then headed toward the redhead, wrapping his arms around the smaller shoulders “It only takes one person...one small action to remind someone that they are wanted...that it’s okay for them to exist.” 

  
“...Did Naruto-kun also feel like you should not be allowed to exist?” Gaara softly asked, trying to relax in the embrace.

The blonde was quiet for a moment, remembering the blonde toddler who had cried but everyone ignored him “Hai...but that was a long time ago.” He softly said, kissing a pale cheek and pulling away with a bright smile on his face “I believe you said something about coffee!” 

Gaara stared at Naruto for a moment longer before offering a small smile and opening the door then headed toward his kitchen. Soft light entered the home. The redhead moved toward the modern looking kitchen, taking out some coffee powder, it read French dark roast. He searched for his kettle, turning on the stove and pouring cool water on it then waited for the water to boil.

“Your place is really nice, Gaara-kun!” Naruto brightly said, looking around, it was decorated simply with some arts on the wall. The walls were decorated a soft sandy color, now that he was focused on the house he could see that there was a door near the kitchen and a hallway just opposite from the bedroom door. “How come you don’t have pictures of your siblings?” The blonde curiously asked.

“I have no need for such things.” The redhead replied, watching Naruto look around his place. He was not used to having guests over.

“Then you don’t want a picture of the two of us?” The blonde asked, moving to look at his partner, brows furrowed.

“Do you want a picture of us?” The redhead asked back, tilting his head, face back to that aloof mask yet his eyes were gentle.

“I want lots of pictures of us! I want to fill our home with memories...oh no, I didn’t take a picture of us at the restaurant! Doesn’t that count as our first date?” Naruto groaned out, covering his face. He heard a snorting sound and looked at his partner “Oi, it’s not funny Gaara-kun! It is the first time we went out to eat something together!”

“Hm.”The redhead was looking quite amused “I thought our first date was the art gallery.”

“....That is true, hey I actually have pictures of the sculptures, I’ll ask my friend Sai to turn it into a frame, would you like a copy?” Naruto brightly asked, heading toward the hallway “Is it okay if I explore? I hope I am not intruding on your space.”

“You may explore.” Gaara replied, going back to preparing the coffee for both of them and worked on preparing something to eat.

Naruto opened doors and looked around, one of them seemed to be a home office, there was a laptop with some paperworks neatly in place, the office had as decoration a massive gourd then some more simple arts. It was beige and maroon in color. The blonde closed the door behind him as he exited, heading toward a second door toward the back, finding a bathroom and then saw at the end of the hallway a third door and staircase. He opened the door and gasped, seeing different types of cactus, he even saw the Christmas one he had given the redhead, they all seemed to be well taken care of.

The blonde headed back to the kitchen, a bright smile on his face “You really do love cactus, huh? I can’t believe you have a whole room full of them!” 

“There is more in the backyard if you wish to see.” The redhead responded, pouring coffee in two mugs.

Naruto moved closer to Gaara, watching the coffee get poured and hummed out “Maybe later. I really like your house, it feels like you...calm and peaceful.” He wrapped his tan arms around the smaller waist, feeling the redhead stiffen for a moment before relaxing “But there is also a certain sadness to it, perhaps I am being arrogant in saying this but I hope to change that sadness...to make you feel as happy as I feel thanks to you.” 

Gaara stayed quiet for a bit, setting the kettle down, thinking of the happier parts of his childhood, a warmth spreading throughout his body “...You already make me feel happy, Naruto-kun.” The redhead replied with a gentle smile on his face.

The blond felt his cheeks reddening when he saw the gentle smile, it made Gaara look younger. He hugged the smaller male, nuzzling his neck and going quiet. He wanted to desperately believe that it was okay to like the redhead, that it was okay for him to be happy after what he did. Sakura said that it was fine...that he was allowed to.

“...Naruto-kun?” The deep voice snapped the blonde out of his thought, kissing a pale cheek.

“That coffee smells delicious, thank you!” Naruto brightly said, moving to pour milk on his mug and five sugars, seeing eggs “I can make us omelette!” One of the very few things he had learned to cook.

“Ah...I was going to try and cook something.” The redhead admitted, being led toward one of the seats while the blonde shook his head, grinning.

“Oh no, Mister...you made the coffee that means I get to make breakfast. Iruka-sensei taught me how to do a mean omelette I’ll have ya know...even Sasuke praised it and that’s saying something.” He proudly said, setting his mug down as well and heading back to the counter to start making the omelette.

The tanned male found some vegetables which he chopped into small pieces, looking around until he found a pan. He added just a bit of oil “Iruka-sensei used to wake me up with an omelette saying that I couldn’t survive only on ramen...which I think is wrong by the way, I could totally survive on ramen alone...did for many years.

I used to have a cup of ramen a day and a glass of milk...one time I had forgotten to check the date and it was a disaster. Sasuke was always acting like a hot shot when we were younger so I came up with a plan to try and get Sakura-chan to like me...this was back when I used to have a massive crush on her, well I thought I did but now I see it was just sibling love. 

Anyways, I had been planning on giving him a piece of my mind, so I go and glare at him, yeah? Just when I am about to snap at him, this guy behind us accidentally pushes me forward and...well that part isn’t important, what’s important is that girls are really scary and that I ended up spending the next few days living next to a toilet cus of the bad milk.” The tanned male laughed at the memories, remembering how all of the girls had beaten him up after his first kiss was stolen and how he had tried to talk to Sakura only to end up running to the toilet.

Gaara remained quiet, looking down at his black coffee. There was a whole life before him that Naruto had lived, one where Sasuke had been the lead role “...Do you think you will ever care for me in the same way that you care for Sasuke-san?” 

Naruto was surprised at the question, biting his bottom lip “...I don’t know.” He was honest “Sasuke and I...it’s complicated. He’s my best friend...my rival...my brother and someone I truly love. For a long time, Sasuke was my everything. He was the first friend I ever made and the first person to treat me like everyone else before Iruka-sensei, he never treated me like an outcast. I am sorry Gaara-kun, I know it’s not the answer you wanted to hear but I rather not lie to you. Don’t get me wrong, even though we’ve only known each other for a few months it feels like I have known you for years, I really do care about you and see you as one of my most important people.” The blonde finished making the first omelette, turning to look at Gaara with a gentle look on his face. The redhead didn’t show a hint of emotions, for a moment the blonde wondered if he was about to lose his partner, if perhaps he should have lied.

“I understand.” Was all Gaara said, taking a sip of his coffee.

Naruto sighed softly, making the second omelette and setting them down on the table, happy when he found ketchup then drew a happy face on both of them, offering the redhead one of it “I do care about you, Gaara-kun, to me you are someone precious in my life like Sakura-chan, Sarada-chan, Shikamaru, Iruka-sensei and all the other important people in my life.” One of the larger hands moved to cup a pale cheek, watching the redhead flinch slightly at the touch. Naruto sighed once more, moving to sit down “...Thank you for the food.”

“I am a very selfish person, Naruto-kun...I hate sharing what is mine...please be patient with me.” The redhead softly said, looking at the omelette, his hand moving to give a squeeze to the tan hand.

Naruto smiled warmly and nodded “Please have some patience with me as well.” Naruto warmly said, squeezing back on the smaller hand then began to eat his omelette and drink his coffee.

They had light conversation, Naruto laughing and telling stories about some of the pranks he used to play as a child. A phone started to ring, the redhead’s gentle expression disappearing “Excuse me.” The redhead said, getting up and disappearing into his room.

Naruto heard a “Yes?” and then silence. The blonde waited quietly, moving to pour more coffee for himself, he could hear part of the conversation “Now? Hm.” The blonde smiled when he saw the redhead coming out of his room

“I need to go out for a few hours...work is calling me.” Gaara looked apologetic, the blonde shaking his head.

“You don’t need to look apologetic, I should be heading back to my place anyways. Where are my clothes?” Naruto wished that they could stay together longer but understood that they both had lives left to live, it was unrealistic to spend all day together every single day. 

  
  


“They are drying on the balcony, your car is in my garage.” Gaara replied.

“Thank you for everything, Gaara-kun, I’ve really had a lot of fun.” Naruto warmly said, moving closer to the pale male and kissing his cheek sweetly “I’d kiss you but my mouth tastes gross.” He joked and laughed then headed to the balcony to grab his clothes. The blonde was quick to get dressed, assuring the redhead that it was fine before leaving.

Was this what dating someone truly feels like? He felt at peace and happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Insomnia strikes again, I haven't slept in like two days almost on the plus side that means I got to write two more chapters for this story. I wrote three for Goodbye Kiss but ended up deleting it and re-writing.
> 
> Thanks to evolving_mechanism, Kaisarion, and the guests for leaving kudos, it means a lot to me!
> 
> Also, WOW, I am already at 200 hits and in such a short amount of time. Thanks to everyone who is reading this story and giving it a chance, I am truly grateful. 
> 
> Next chapter, Gaara and Naruto go to Hidden Leaf and Gaara meets Sakura for the first time!


	14. ch14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Gaara fly to Konoha, Sakura meets Gaara for the first time~

Two months passed in the blink of an eye for the blonde. His relationship with the redhead only grew stronger. His partner often needed to travel due to work and would be gone for days, always giving him an apologetic look but the blonde did not mind, he still felt at peace. There were some nights when it wasn’t easy, when he would see those dark, lifeless eyes staring at him, accusing him of moving on.

Sakura had demanded to meet Gaara which led to Naruto asking his partner if he’d like to accompany him to Hidden Leaf, Konohagakure the small island where Sakura lived and where they had been born. Naruto had been surprised when Gaara agreed to it. The pinkette had been happy hearing the news, eager to meet the person that had made the depressed blonde become so happy once more.

She had seen pictures of Naruto and Gaara together, one of them was the blonde’s screen saver which was the blonde grinning and making a peace sign, his cheeks pressed against his partner while Gaara stared ahead, cheeks bright red. The other one was of Naruto kissing Gaara’s cheek sweetly while the redhead blushed. For his phone’s lock screen Naruto had a picture he had secretly taken of Gaara giving him one of those gentle looks with a small smile on the redhead’s face, he hadn’t shared that one with anyone.

The tanned male’s house had been filled with pictures of them, even though they’ve only known each other for 5 months it felt like much longer. He’s learned not to ask about the redhead’s siblings or family life, it was complicated and something that Gaara didn’t seem to like talking about. After that drunken night he’s not tried to take things further in their relationship, perfectly content with the cuddles and sweet kisses that they would share sometimes.

Packing had been a task in itself, Naruto had tried to practically pack his house while Gaara had a small luggage, dark sunglasses on. The redhead had gotten them spacious seats but Naruto had put his foot down when he saw the price for first class, saying that economy was perfectly fine. The 5 hours plane right to Hidden Leaf was spent with Naruto doing some work and happily talking to Gaara.

“Wait until you taste Sakura’s amazing cooking...just remember that you are my partner, you can’t fall for her, got it?” The blonde joke, kissing a pale cheek sweetly and laughing.

“I have no interest in anyone other than Naruto-kun.” Gaara replied matter of factly.

Naruto grinned, hugging the redhead “Good, I’ll hold you to those words, Gaara-kun!” He happily said. 

They talked about other things like Naruto’s favorite ramen shop growing up which they needed to visit, they just **_needed_ **to! 

“I have been to Konohagakure a few times.” Gaara said, thinking about his teenage years.

“Seriously? How come? Most people don’t know a thing about my country!” Naruto admitted with a laugh.

“...Business…” And that was all the redhead said on the matter, Naruto dropped the subject quickly.

Even now he had no idea what type of business or job the redhead had, just that it seemed to be very important and took his partner away often.

Somewhere along the ride the blonde had fallen asleep, curled up against his lover and snoring softly. When they arrived they had to grab all of Naruto’s extra luggage and were met by a beautiful young woman with short pink hair that was neck length, bright green eyes and a mark on her forehead. She was dressed in a red kimono shirt with long, white pants and high heels.

“Sakura-chan!” Naruto happily greeted, the pinkette’s eyes widening before running toward the taller male.

They hugged tightly, Naruto spinning her around and laughing until she ordered him to set her down. She cupped his cheeks with a warm smile on her face “Let me see...you really are looking better...your eyes are bright again.” She warmly said “What about your arm? How is it? Does anything hurt, Naru-kun?” 

Naruto laughed and shook his head “Nothing hurts, I promise.” He brightly said.

Sakura gave him another look then turned to see Gaara who had remained quiet, she moved to hug him but remembered what Naruto had told her about the redhead not liking physical touches. She gave a polite bow instead “Hello, you must be Gaara-san my name is Haruno Sakura, Naruto has told me a great deal about you...I know that he’s a knucklehead...and clumsy...and a complete idiot but thank you for taking care of him and making him happy, I’ll be leaving him in your care throughout the future.” She politely said “Ah...but if you dare hurt a single hair on my idiot’s face... **_I’ll kill you, cha!”_ **Her inner Sakura coming out at the end.

Naruto laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his head “She’s not dangerous, I swear...unless you piss her off then good luck. I still have childhood scars.”

Gaara let out a snort, giving a polite bow back “I promise to watch over him...if I do something to harm Naruto-kun...I will accept all punishment given to me.” 

Sakura clapped her hands, smiling sweetly “Oh Naru-kun, this one is a keeper, hurry up and marry him before he realizes what an idiot you are and finds someone else.” She joked, moving to grab two of Naruto’s heavy bags like they weighed nothing. The redhead looked slightly surprised for a moment but quickly recovered. “Let’s go, boys!” She happily said.

Once in her van, she let Naruto sit in the back with Gaara. The blonde and pinkette exchange a look “He knows about it, Sakura-chan...you don’t have to worry.” Naruto softly said.

“Ah...okay. You still can’t sit in the passenger seat without panicking, can you?” She gently asked. It was something that happened after the accident. Naruto was perfectly fine driving a car but if he was in the passenger seat he would start getting flashbacks and panicking.

“...I am sorry, Sakura-chan.” Naruto softly said, looking down in shame. He felt a pale hand squeeze his larger one, turning to smile softly at Gaara “Thank you, Gaara-kun.”

“I told you not to apologize, there is nothing for you to apologize to me about. Take your time...maybe one day you will be able to.” Sakura replied firmly, driving rather quickly through the warm island. “Right, so first I’ll drop you off at the house. I need to run back to work, they called me while I was on my way here, there’s been an accident and I am needed since Tsunade-sensei has disappeared once more...probably gambling away her money and trying to seduce a guy or two...you know how it is.” She said with a roll of her eyes.

There was a picture of Naruto pouting and glaring, Sasuke was scowling and glaring ahead as well while Sakura stayed in the middle trying to look happy, an arm around each young boy. There was a man with silver hair who seemed to be smiling as well. The three of them seemed to be in their early teens, the picture was hanging from the middle of the car. “I am not sure if this idiot has told you or not...but we’ve known each other since we were 3, I used to think that Naruto was really annoying since he was always chasing after me, playing stupid pranks on our village elder and got the absolute worst grades...but then we ended up in the same course and well...I guess it was meant to be. He’s like my obnoxious brother...do you remember the time that Kakashi-sensei tested us on teamwork and we almost failed because of your stupidity?” 

Naruto laughed, resting his head on the smaller shoulder “You said that you were on a diet and offered me your food after Sasuke tried to feed me because Kakashi-sensei got furious at our terrible teamwork.” Naruto recollected. 

“Yeah...I still remember what he taught us that day.” Sakura softly said,

**_“Those that cannot complete a task due to trying to take care of their teammate are scums in our line of work...but those that leave their teammates behind in order to complete a task are worse than scum!”_ **They both seriously quoted then grinned at each other.

“...Worse than scum for choosing a task over teammates?” Gaara asked, looking at Naruto.

“Hai, a human life is worth much more than any tasks that need to be completed...but that’s all in the past for me. I left the detective life behind, I am just an ordinary civilian now.” Naruto shrugged, bending to rub their nose against each other, cheeks bright red. A look of affection on the cerulean blue eyes.

“Ugh, Naru-kun get a room, you look like you want to jump Gaara-san.” Sakura jokes, faking to be grossed out, in return Naruto stuck out his tongue playfully at her and they laughed.

“Where is Sarada-chan?” Naruto asked curiously, going back to curling up against the redhead.

“Right now she’s in class then after that she has martial arts practice today. She’ll be arriving home at 18:30, I’ve left some food ready but I am afraid I won’t be home until much later, the hospital has been packed lately. I have to do 5 surgeries today plus the administrative stuff I don’t know if I’ll be home tonight...sorry.” Sakura gave Naruto an apologetic look, making a quick turn and riding up a small hill.

“It’s okay, I know you are really busy. You are one of the best doctors in the world.” He gave her a gentle smile.

“So, Gaara-kun, what is it that you do?” The pinkette curiously asked.

“Nothing of importance.” Was all the redhead said, ending the subject there.

The atmosphere turned a bit awkward after that. Naruto was glad when they arrived at Sakura’s apartment. They went up to the complex, Sakura showing them the spare room with the ensuite bathroom, they would have to share the bed “Try not to be loud if you get laid, Naru-kun or _**I’ll rip off your balls, cha!**_ ” Sakura showed her fist and glared at her best friend before they laughed.

The blonde felt his cheeks redden, squirming “We are not...we haven’t….it’s not like that Sakura-chan!” The flustered blonde replied, giving Gaara a pleading look, asking for help secretly.

“We will not have sexual intercourse.” The redhead bluntly said which made Sakura choke and then started laughing hard while Naruto groaned out and covered his face.

“You sound like our sex ed teacher!” Sakura choked out between laughter.

“Yeah...that’s what I said.” Naruto grumbled.

The pinkette shook her head in amusement, moving to kiss her best friend’s cheek sweetly “Right, so I have to go now, they just rang again begging for help. My home is your home...I left some food ready in case you are hungry, there are fresh towels. Idiot, you know where everything is so treat Gaara-san well!” With that the pinkette ran off, closing the front door behind her.

Naruto shook his head in amusement and yawned, heading toward the kitchen “Sakura-chan can be intense sometimes but she’s a good person. She’s considered to be one of the top doctors in the world but chose to stay living here in Konohagakure instead of moving somewhere else.” The blonde knew why the pinkette was staying, this was where Sasuke was...where their memories were.

The blonde opened up the cabinet, taking out the kettle “Would you like some coffee, Gaara-kun?” He politely asked, adding the cool water and turning on the stove then waited.

“Hai, thank you.” The redhead replied, following Naruto to the kitchen. “Sakura-san seems kind.”

Naruto beamed, nodding “Yeah, she’s super nice...for one of our tasks at the academy we had to do a survival test. Sasuke-kun and I ended up getting poisoned, Sakura-chan stayed up for two nights, when a group from a criminal organization tried to attack us she defended us….even cutting off her precious hair.”His mind went back to those days...things had been so complicated yet so simple. He shook his head, taking out the powdered coffee “She was our team’s medic which was a good thing since I was always getting injured.” 

“Hm.” The redhead was giving the blonde his full attention, it was always interesting to hear about Naruto’s past yet he wished that he could have shared those memories.

“We can go tomorrow to my favorite ramen shop...and I have to show you the hot springs that Pervy-sage and I used to train at!” Naruto was eager to show Gaara his world. He let the water boil, moving to hug the redhead and nuzzle his neck affectionately “Thank you for coming with me...I know you are really busy with work. Is it really okay for you to take two week off?”

“It is. I finished work early.” Gaara replied, letting the tan arm wrap around his waist. It was still odd for the redhead to be showered with so much affection but he did not mind it, not as long as it was from Naruto.

“I should be done with my sessions in a few days, I think Sakura-chan just wants to be cautious.” Naruto assured his partner, kissing his cheek sweetly, lips moving down to the pale neck, feeling the smaller male shivering.

“Due to the nerves that were attached to your prosthetics?” Gaara asked, cheeks reddening.

The blonde nodded, hearing the whistle of the kettle and pulling away. He moved to make their coffee, for the redhead it was black with a sugar and a half while the taller male got a very creamy and sugary coffee. He set them both down on the table and sat down, letting out another yawn. “I think Sarada-chan and you will get along really well, she’s very mature for her age and also super smart like Sakura and Sasuke.”

“She sounds like an interesting person.” Gaara replied, not willing to admit that he was still a bit nervous about the meeting.

“She doesn’t talk too much, completely different from me. I’ve always been a talker...I remember when I was 12 I decided it would be hilarious to paint the elders hill and make them all look like clowns! Iruka-sensei caught me and made me clean the whole thing up and don’t even get me started on my sexy girl disguise!” Naruto burst out laughing, remembering the way that guys used to go crazy over it but that had been when his body had still been petite and he could sneak in some push up bras. 

“Uncle Yashamaru used to teach me about herbs and medicine.” Gaara murmured, waiting for his coffee to cool down.

“Sakura knows a lot about herbs! Sadly I am a complete idiot when it comes to it...I know ginger is good for inflammation and berries are good for antioxidants...oh right, you told me that Aloe gel is good for injuries, right?” The blonde grinned, seeming proud of his limited knowledge.

“Hai.” Gaara replied, watching his partner try to take a sip of the creamy coffee only for his tongue to get burned.

They chatted some more about herbs while drinking their coffee then went to the bedroom. While Gaara went to their bathroom to shower and change, Naruto took off his clothes and put on some sweatpants and a bright orange shirt that had a frog face drawn on it. 

Naruto got on his side of the bed, trying to stay awake, the last thing that he remembered was pale skin and jaded eyes before falling asleep with a smile on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol Gaara and "Sexual intercourse" I know, I have a crappy sense of humor for finding that hilarious.
> 
> Next chapter, Gaara meets Sarada and they spend some time together. Sakura teases Naruto about when he's gonna get laid.
> 
> As always, please read, leave comments, kudos and bookmarks! They mean a lot to me and let me know that there are people enjoying this and gives me motivation.
> 
> -Y-
> 
> P.S Thank you to evolving_mechanism for the feedback on this chapter, thanks to them I managed to fix some errors.


	15. ch15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaara, Sarada & Naruto spend some time together which leads to the blonde wondering what it would be like if Gaara and him had their own family.
> 
> Naruto loses his cool a bit.

When Naruto opened his eyes, the clock read 19:00. He yawned and sat up, rubbing his eyes sleepily. After a minute or two, the blonde went to the bathroom where he took a quick shower, changing back into his sweatpants and bright shirt then brushed his teeth and headed out the room.

The first thing that he noticed was the redhead, the blonde’s face softening at the sight in front of him. Gaara was sitting next to a small raven, their back to him but they seemed to be in deep conversation...well the raven seemed to be in deep conversation. Familiar dark eyes behind red glasses suddenly stared at him, eyes widening in shock before the young girl grinned and got up. She politely excused herself and ran toward the blonde, small arms wrapping around Naruto’s waist.

“Naruto-san! You are awake.” She brightly said “I was talking to Gaara-san about the history of sand sculptures, did you know that the first recorded sand sculpture was formed in 1897? For proper sculpting you need to use a special sand that has a mixture of clay and grains so that it can last longer.” 

Naruto glanced at Gaara who had a small, gentle smile on his face, the blonde grinning. “I didn’t know that, did you read it in a book or did Gaara-kun teach you?” He asked, bending down to kiss the top of her head.

“I knew about the first sculpture but I hadn’t been so sure about the clay part in sand. Gaara-san knows a lot about sand! He also knows a lot about medicine like mama.” Sarada said excitedly, her cheeks turning red once she realized that she was showing excitement. The raven quickly pulled away and cleared her throat “Mama left some food ready, would you like to eat some? Gaara-san and I thought it would be rude if we ate without you.” She added more calmly.

“Thank you for waiting, I’ve been dreaming about Sakura-chan’s food! Mmm...fried rice with scrambled eggs...and tomatoes.” Naruto could even smell the herbs that Sakura used to cook. Back in the academy his sensitive nose had made him quite famous, rivaling that of the Inuzuka clan.

“Eugh...tomatoes.” Sarada wrinkled her nose, going toward the kitchen but stopped in a small altar next to the kitchen, she opened up the two wooden door, there was a picture of Sasuke who was smirking, next to him was Sakura grinning and holding on to one side of his arm with Naruto on the opposite side grinning, an arm around Sasuke’s shoulder. The three of them appeared to be in their late teens, that had been one of the last pictures they had taken together. Sarada bowed politely and smiled warmly at the picture “Hello papa...I am going to eat with Naruto-san and Gaara-san now. Please watch over mama while she works tonight...have sweet dreams.” She fixed her glasses, heading to the kitchen.

Naruto stared at the picture of the three of them, for a moment a wave of guilt hitting him all over. It was his fault that Sasuke wasn’t here right now, doing homework with Sarada...teaching her how to ride a bike or how to fight. He felt a cool, smaller hand holding his much bigger one, bringing him out of his guilty thoughts. The blonde turned to look at the smaller male, feeling a warmth spread throughout his body, his arms wrapping around Gaara’s waist and his nose pressing against the pale neck “Thank you for being here, Gaara-kun.” He murmured before pulling away and smiling brightly, going toward Sarada.

“How is your martial art class going? Your papa used to be the best student in the academy when it came to martial arts.”The blonde said, moving to look at the fridge then took out the gallon of milk and poured himself a glass.

“Lee-sensei came today, he was teaching us a special move...but only his son Metal was able to do it. I was going to head out to the training ground with my friends...but you will only be here for a little while, won’t you Naruto-san?” Dark eyes stared at Naruto before glancing at Gaara's, cheeks turning even redder “Are you two really like Mama and Papa...your relationship? Mama said that Gaara-san makes you really happy like Papa used to make her feel...and that maybe you two will have a family of your own. I think that would be nice...I am a big girl now, you don’t have to worry about me anymore, Naruto-san...I just want you to be happy.” 

Naruto felt his whole face turn bright red, suddenly coughing as he started to choke on his saliva, it didn’t help when he heard the familiar snort “I...errmm...well...even if Gaara-kun and I were to have a family of our own...in the distant future, like a very far away distant future...you would still be an important part of my family. 

We will still have our winter and summer vacations together. Nothing will change between you and me, remember that Sarada-chan...nothing will  **_ever_ ** change the bond that ties us...one stronger than blood.” The blonde moved closer to the raven and crouched, letting his index and middle finger gently tap her forehead like Sasuke used to do to him. “I promised your papa that I would watch over you in his place...and do you remember what I said about my promises?”

“....You never go back on your words, that is your detective way. You never back down and you never go back on your words...you never leave behind someone in your team that is the way you live your life.” Sarada replied softly, feeling her eyes water but she didn’t want to look like a child, not in front of her role model and his special person. “Ah, f-f-food is ready!” She was quick to turn and open the microwave, moving to grab the hot plate only to get burned, the plate falling “Ow!”

Naruto was quick to check her hand with a worried look on his face, Gaara moving closer “It's just a small burn, it will be gone in a minute or two. We should still put it under cool water.” The blonde said, leading her toward the tab and picking her up then turned on the cool water and put her hand under it so that it would cool down.

“S-S-Sorry.” She murmured, feeling embarrassed.

“We are just glad you are okay.” Naruto brightly said, turning to look at the redhead “Right, Gaara-kun?” He warmly asked.

The redhead nodded, glancing at her hand “No matter what happens between Naruto-kun and I...things will never change between you two. I promise.” Gaara softly said, hesitating before awkwardly patting her head.

Sarada stared at both of them before laughing and crying at the same time. She felt relieved knowing that Naruto-san would always be Naruto-san and that he found someone so nice to be with him “Thank you very much.” 

After that they ate, the raven practiced some martial arts with the blonde while Gaara quietly watched. It was just a few punches and kicks, nothing too complicated. Naruto moved to take Sarada to bed once she had showered and changed into her PJs.

“Tell me that story again Naruto-san...about your first mission together!” She begged.

“Well...old man third had kept giving us stinky missions about catching cats and chasing after dogs till I said  _ ‘No more! We are grown up and deserve grown up missions!’ _ mind you...we were only slightly older than you..but anyways, I went off about how mature we were and how we should have a mission that reflects that, so the old geezer decided to give us a guard duty one, we were going to the island of mist! 

What we didn’t know at that time was that this was a mission much more dangerous than simply guarding. We were almost ambushed and in that moment I completely froze, maaaan I was so lame! You're papa pushed me out of the way and saved me, then he beat up the bad guys!” Naruto dramatically said, smiling when he saw that she was already sleeping. He gently removed her glasses and kissed the top of her head, before moving to get up.

The blonde noticed his partner by the door, listening quietly. He got out as quietly as possible, turning off the light and leaving on only the lamp then let out a soft sigh.

“You are really good with children, Naruto-kun.” The redhead said, heading toward the couch.

“I should be saying that to you, Sarada-chan usually doesn’t warm up to people so quickly yet she seems to have taken a great liking to you.” Naruto replied with a chuckle, moving to sit next to the redhead and curl up against him “Thank you for earlier.” 

“...There is nothing to thank me for.” The redhead murmured, the scent of citrus and ramen hitting his nose once more.

“Mmm...I completely froze up when I saw the picture of Sasuke earlier. I was thinking about how he should have been the one helping her with her homework...and listening to stories about her day.” Naruto gently said, nuzzling the pale neck “I know I should stop thinking so much about it...that I am just being annoying...but I can’t help wondering how things would have turned out if the accident hadn’t occurred.” 

“You cannot change the past, Naruto-kun...all you can do is choose your next steps in order to create your future.” Gaara told him, letting his pale fingers run through the blonde locks.

Naruto was quiet for a moment as he thought over those words “...I’d like it if my future includes you in it.” He finally replied “Seeing you with Sarada-chan made me think of us...with our own family one day...maybe. I thought about how nice it would be if we adopted a lot of children. Waking up by your side every morning and hearing the children running around and laughing. I thought of Sasuke and Sakura coming over with Sarada and all of us being one big, happy family.” Naruto was embarrassed by his own words, he glanced up, staring at the jaded eyes and found himself blushing brightly.

“I do not think I would be a good parent.” Gaara softly said, thinking about his childhood...about all of the things he’s done and what Naruto would do if he ever found out.  **_‘Oh, he’ll run as far away as he can from you and never look back...he’ll leave you if he finds out about all the blood on his precious’ Gaara hand’_ ** A familiar sinister voice taunted.

“I know you’ll be great! Just look at how Sarada-chan acted.” The blonde brightly said, moving to press their lips against each other, his fingers wrapping around the crimson locks.

The redhead kissed back softly, savoring the taste of his partner. When he felt their kiss heating up he pulled away, cheeks bright red “Sarada-chan does not act like a child.” Was his defense.

Naruto chuckled, unable to disagree “That’s because she has Uchiha and Haruno blood, they are both really mature.” Naruto replied, very tempted to go for another kiss but decided not to push his luck. Sakura’s teasing about getting laid came to his mind. He was perfectly happy taking things slowly, it’s not like he had a lot of experience in that department. He imagined soft, pale skin with crimson locks and those intense jaded eyes looking at him. It did not take long for his mind to go down the rabbit hole of things they could do together.

“...Naruto-kun?” The familiar deep voice snapped the blonde out of his thoughts.

“I am not a pervert, I swear!” He was quick to say, staring at Gaara with wide eyes.

A snort escaped the redhead’s lips, giving Naruto one of those gentle looks “I did not say you were.” The redhead responded, staring at the cerulean eyes.

“Errmm...well...good.” A nervous chuckle left the blonde’s lips. A warm smile formed on his face, cupping the redhead’s cheeks “Tell me again...how did I get lucky enough to be with someone as amazing as you?” 

Gaara felt the familiar warmth spread throughout his body. He remained quiet, feeling warm lips against his own. He kissed back, wondering if this was how it felt like to have an important person in his life, it was a similar yet different feeling from when he was with his uncle. Naruto made him feel good in a different kind of way.

Naruto deepened their kiss, feeling the soft locks wrapped around his fingers, a small, pleased sound escaping his lips before feeling Gaara pull away. The blonde pouted, wishing that the kiss could have lasted a bit longer. He’s never been so glad to hear Sakura’s ringtone - **_Candy, Candy, Candy, Sweetie, Sweetie, Girls love!-_ ** “Ah, I should get that, it’s Sakura-chan.” He said, quickly getting up and leaving the redhead on the couch. Naruto kept reminding himself that they were taking things slowly, wasn’t that what he had asked for? Still, he wished that they could take the next step.

“Hiya Saku-chan!” He happily greeted, leaving the door to their bedroom open.

“Hey Naru-kun...how are things in the house? Did Sarada take a bath and go to sleep?” She asked worriedly.

“Yup and yup! We practiced martial arts for a bit then she got ready for bed. We also had your delicious food, thank you for cooking!” He brightly replied.

“Thanks again for taking care of her for me...oh before I forget, I’ve left some condoms on the side you like to sleep in...unless you aren’t the top?” Sakura teased and giggled.

Naruto felt his cheeks turn bright red, remembering the kiss that the two of them had shared and how Gaara had pulled away “I-I-I-I told you already...we haven’t...we won’t... **_you know._ ** “ This was so embarrassing!

“Huh...how come? Does he have some problem functioning in that area...or is it you that can’t function? I know you went through a period where yo-”Sakura was stopped by the blonde.

“Sttooopp....please! It’s not like that...I mean...I dunno...just...could we drop it?” Naruto didn’t want to let his mind wander down the different reasons why Gaara might not be interested.

“Tsunade-sensei brought me some sakura wines...why don’t you have a glass with him and warm each other up?” Sakura teased and giggled.

“...Just drop it, alright?” Naruto groaned out “...Besides, you know how I get when I am drunk...I am never getting drunk in front of him again.” 

“Well...I could take Sarada out tomorrow night for a bit and you two could... **_ya know._ ** ..might do you some good.” The pinkette half-joked and half propositioned seriously “I mean, how long has it been since you’ve gotten laid? I think it’s been like a decade or something!”

“ **_Sakura, just drop the damn subject already!_ ** ” Naruto snapped, surprised at his outburst, eyes widening “I-I-I-I am sorry Sakura-chan...I didn’t mean to snap..I just...I…”

“...It’s umm...it’s alright, I shouldn’t have pushed...sorry. I need to go, work calls.” With that the pinkette hung up.

The blonde covered his face, feeling guilty all over again. He had just snapped at his best friend, perhaps Sakura was right in that he needed to talk to someone. He let out a shaky breath before pushing his feelings down and standing up, a bright smile on his face.

  
“ **_That’s right...keep smiling for everyone, keep acting like their perfect little golden boy...if you show them the monster that you really are, they will all leave, kiddo._ ** ” The familiar voice of his inner demon sneered at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to evolving_mechanism for the feedback last chapter, it helped me make it better. This is the thank you present.
> 
> Sakura's ringtone is CANDY CANDY by Kyary Pamyu Pamyu, check it out its hilarious and cute. 
> 
> Next chapter they go to the hospital for Naruto's check up, we also get to see some of Naruto's self destructive behaviors.
> 
> As always please read, leave comments, bookmark and kudos. They let me know that there are people interested in this story and gives me motivation.
> 
> Okay I haven't slept in more than 24 hours, I am gonna go and pass out now.
> 
> -Y-


	16. ch16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto goes for his medical check up and meets Gaara's sister, we also get to learn about how unstable Naruto is.

Last night had been awkward, after talking with Sakura he had excused himself from Gaara’s presence and gone for a run, needing to clear up his head. He had found himself by his old training ground, remembering how he used to train all day in order to be a great detective.

There had been so many sweat and tears, so many sleepless nights and yet here he was. “You can either keep crying and acting like a stupid loser...or you can get yourself together and move on...what will you do, moron?” He asked himself, punching one of the logs, then kept punching and kicking it. 

The blonde let out all of his frustration on it, he was Naruto Uzumaki, he wasn’t a quitter and he wasn’t a downer! Why was he pouting around like some silly child who wasn’t getting it’s way? Hadn’t he promised Sasuke that he’d take care of Sakura and Sarada?He had sworn that he would keep them happy and watch over them, that he wouldn’t let them be sad yet here he was making Sakura worry. 

**_“Two guys aren’t meant to be together, Naruto.”_ ** The blonde knew that, he had learned that with Sasuke yet here he was again, except this time he was the one acting like a jerk. Why was he doubting if the redhead liked him? Gaara wasn’t the type to lie, at least he didn’t think so.

He needed to control that temper of his, it had been a big flaw when he was younger. Once he let out some steam, he looked down at his now bloody knuckles, heading toward the pharmacy to get some bandages and alcohol, trying to think what story he would come up with. In every corner of this island he could see hints of his childhood, of Sasuke and how their lives had intertwined. Here, more than ever the blonde felt like he was being haunted by his best friend, it was why he had decided to leave a year after the accident.

He put on one of his bright smiles when he saw the pharmacist, greeting the person and paying for the bandage and small bottle of alcohol. Once out, he sat down on a bench and cleaned up his bloody knuckle then awkwardly bandaged it, the job wasn’t done too well but it would have to do for now. His prosthetic hand was in no better shape, bruised up and with some cuts, Sakura would probably scold him for it.

When he arrived at Sakura’s flat, he tried to enter as quietly as possible, wondering if Gaara had gone to bed.

“Naruto-kun?” The familiar deep voice asked.

The blonde jumped slightly, turning to look to the living room where the redhead was, next to the balcony door. “O-Oh, Gaara-kun. Sorry, I didn’t see you there.” He sheepishly said, rubbing the back of his neck. The tanned male felt a wave of guilt hit him when he saw the worried look in the jade eyes.

“What happened to your arms?” The voice sounded calm enough but Naruto knew better. 

For a moment the blonde thought about lying, saying something like his hand got caught in a door or that he fell but decided to go for the semi-truth. “I am fine! I saw my old training ground...and it brought back some nostalgic feelings, next thing I knew I was training that’s why I came back so late. I am sorry for worrying you.” 

Gaara walked toward his partner, grabbing both injured hands, checking the damage. Some of the skin from the prosthetic hand had come off, the bandaged that had been wrapped in the other hand was red with blood. The redhead stared at the blood  **_‘Remember how much fun we used to have together? All the blood we spilled as a team? Don’t you want to keep having fun, brat?’_ ** The familiar sinister voice teased the redhead, for a moment Gaara saw the large racoon monster grinning at him, claw hands coming to grab his face.

“...Gaara-kun?” Naruto asked worriedly “What’s wrong?” 

The redhead ignored the large racoon that was grinning at him “I’ll clean up your wound, sit down.” 

The blonde gave another worried look but nodded, the redhead led Naruto toward the bathroom and sat him down on the toilet. He grabbed the bottle of alcohol, taking off the now bloody bandage then checked the damage. 

Gaara tried to control his bloodlust, hearing the large racoon giggle and taunt him. He worked quietly, checking the wounds then grabbed the bandage and wrapped it carefully, the way that his uncle had taught him. When it was properly tied he went toward the prosthetic hand, his thumb gently brushing one of the cuts. Gaara bandaged the prosthetic hand as well then looked up at the blonde who had remained quiet through the process. He was met with a warm yet sad look directed at him, feeling his smaller hands get squeezed.

“Thank you, Gaara-kun.” Naruto warmly said, bending down to press their forehead against each other “I am really glad you are in my life.” He gave the smaller hands another squeeze before moving to stand up, testing his prosthetic hand, everything seemed to be working well. For a moment the blonde was tempted to ask the redhead if he was secretly a medic...or at least had some experience. He wanted to know more about Gaara, the redhead was a massive mystery to him.

“I am really glad you are in my life as well.” Gaara murmured, the two sharing a smile. 

After that Naruto dragged Gaara to bed, pressing their body against each other, resting his head on the smaller chest and dozing off to the sound of his partner’s heartbeat.

* * *

The next day, Sakura acted as if nothing happened between them. She smiled brightly and greeted them for breakfast “Good morning, sleepyhead!” She moved to hug Naruto and kiss his cheek then bowed politely to Gaara and ushered them to eat.

Sarada smiled brightly at both of them “Good morning, Naruto-san, Gaara-san.” She politely greeted, eating her omelette which had a smiling face drawn on it.

“Morning, Sarada-chan! Did you sleep well?”Naruto asked, grabbing the milky coffee that Sakura passed to him “Sakura-chan...have I told you how much I love you?” 

The pinkette laughed, passing a mug of black coffee to the redhead “Since we were 5.” She replied amused “Finish eating up and then we’ll go to...what happened to your arms?!” 

The blonde gulped, looking at Gaara with a pleading look but the redhead remained quiet, listening to Sarada talking about a book and some theory.

“...Ano...wait, before you get angry, listen, alright?” He begged, seeing Sakura glare at him “Soooo funny story...one moment I am walking and minding my business...the next I am back at our old training ground and just so happen to train a bit...just a bit! It’s a scratch, right Gaara-kun?”

“...Hm…” The redhead already knew better than to get between those two. He wondered if that was how siblings were meant to act, his relationship with his brother and sister was vastly different.

“Gaara-kun, you are sup-” Naruto squeaked when Sakura slammed her hand down on the table, cracking it “ **_CHA,_ ** **Naruto you baka! You are lucky that we are going to the hospital today anyways!** ” She snapped, grabbing his hand forcefully “...At Least your bandages are done properly, tch.”

“Gaara-kun helped me.” Naruto replied, sighing in relief when the pinkette pulled away and sat down to eat.

“Hurry up and eat you idiot! You are lucky I don’t break your arms myself!” She growled out before switching back and smiling sweetly at Sarada and Gaara “Sarada-chan, make sure to take your time...and remember to take your lunch with you.” She sweetly said “Gaara-san, please enjoy your breakfast, let me know if you’d like more coffee or anything else.”

Sarada quickly finished eating and put her plate on the dishwasher then bowed politely “Thank you very much, I am off! See you tonight.” 

“See you tonight, be safe.” Naruto and Sakura said at the same time, the pinkette leading her daughter out the door and kissing her forehead.

After they ate breakfast and drank their coffee, they headed to the hospital. Naruto kept getting stopped by people on the street, they hugged him and happily greeted him. It seemed that the blonde knew everyone and was friends with them, vastly different from when he had been younger and he had been shunned. 

Once at the hospital Naruto and Gaara were led to a private room that had different machines. Sakura checked the blonde’s heartbeat, drew some blood and sent it to the lab then checked his weight and height “I can’t believe you are already 6ft...I still remember when you were shorter than me.” She teased.

When she saw the bruises on Naruto’s arm, she glared at him, she cleaned the wound once more and changed the bandage, then looked at his prosthetic hand and sighed.

“You have to be more careful with this...luckily it’s something that is easy to fix. Oh right...make sure to go and talk to Shika, alright?” Sakura said, standing up “...And  **he** is still in the same room...if you’d like to say hi.” With that the pinkette excused herself, needing to get ready for a surgery.

Naruto hesitated, biting the inside of his cheek then headed toward his specialized doctor to fix his prosthetic. Adding the layer of skin to his prosthetic hadn’t taken that much time, Naruto chatting happily to the doctor. 

When that was done, Naruto looked at Gaara then sighed “Errmm...this next task might take a bit of time, there is a cafeteria if you’d like to wait.” So far the redhead has remained by his side quietly but the talk he needed to have with his therapist...well it was a bit complicated.

“I’ll stay close by.” Gaara calmly replied, tilting his head slightly when he read the name on the door which soon opened.

“-Promise I’ll tell him when the time comes, but you know how scary my bro-” A beautiful blonde woman with hair in 4 pigtails froze up and stared at the redhead in shock.

“Temari?” A lazy voice asked, coming into view and cringing when he saw Gaara.

“Huh….what’s wrong?” Naruto asked, confused by what was going on. He saw the way that Gaara stared at the beautiful woman and at the brunette behind her.

“G-G-G-Gaara...what are you doing here?” Temari asked, looking at her brother and then at the brunette behind her.

“...What a drag…” The brunette sighed out.

“Huh...you know her, Gaara-kun?” Naruto asked, staring at Temari and then at Gaara, they looked kinda similar.

“...She’s my older sister.” The redhead responded, looking the brunette up and down.

“Y-YOUR SISTER?!” Naruto shouted in surprise then covered his mouth, staring at his partner and then at the beautiful woman. Naruto was quick to bow deeply and smiled brightly “Hello I am Uzumaki Naruto and I am Gaara-kun….Gaara-kun…” Wait, what was he supposed to say? 

“Precious person.” Gaara said bluntly “Who is that, Temari?” 

The blonde woman stared in shock at her little brother and Naruto, since when did Gaara care about anyone except himself?! “...Precious person?”She asked, shocked, then glanced at the brunette who looked bored.

“Neh Shikamaru...how come you are with Gaara’s sister?” Naruto asked, cheeks bright red. He was Gaara’s precious person...his precious person!

“...Temari?” Shikamaru asked, running a hand through his hair “You care to explain or should I?”

Temari hesitated, looking a bit pale “...Shikamaru is my...he’s my…”

Gaara looked between Temari and Shikamaru “Hm.” Was all he said, walking away.

“G-Gaara?” Temari called out, giving Shikamaru a regretful look before running off after her younger brother.

“...I don’t get it…” The tanned male said, hearing his friend sigh once more.

“You comin’ or what, Naruto?” Shikamaru lazily asked.

Naruto nodded, locking the door behind him and moving to sit down on the couch. He watched the brunette lit a cigarette and opened one of the windows then took a lazy drag.

“Sakura said that you’ve been having mood swings again...I am guessing you’d like to chat.” Was all the lazy brunette said.

Naruto hesitated, staring down at his hands, he’s always hated talking about his feelings.

“Or we can both just be quiet, don’t matter to me.” Shikamaru said with a shrug.

The blonde stayed quiet for a minute or two, taking in a deep breath before exhaling slowly “I feel like I am betraying Sasuke by being with Gaara-kun. I mean...it’s my fault he’s in a coma and that he’s not here right now.”

“You did not cause the accident, Naruto.” Shikamaru calmly said, taking another deep drag, watching the people running around, living their life.

“But I did! If we hadn’t been arguing he might have still been here!” Naruto exclaimed.

“Maybe...or maybe not. It’s not a fact, is it?” Shikamaru asked, turning to glance at his friend. “Tell me about Gaara.”

The blonde blushed brightly when he thought about the redhead, about those warm jaded eyes and the gentle look that his partner would reserve just for him. “He’s a really kind person...he makes me feel at peace but…” Naruto hesitated, for a moment seeing a familiar sinister form. 

“But?” The brunette edged on.

“...He’ll leave too, won’t he? Two guys aren’t meant to be together...it’s not right.” It had taken a long time for Naruto to open up to Shikamaru like this, after the accident the blonde had been a wreck.

“Why isn’t it right?” Shikamaru finished his cigarette, moving to sit across from the blonde.

“...Well guys are meant to be with girls and create family...right?” The blonde asked, remembering Sasuke’s words, his chest aching.

“Says who?” Shikamaru asked, listening quietly.

“....Says...you know who. It’s not right...what if Gaara-kun decides that it’s not right? What if I hurt him as well and he ends up in a coma or dead? What if I hurt someone else, Shika?” The blonde felt his hands tremble, he could hear the horns and see those dark eyes staring at him.

“Are the hallucinations back, Naruto?” Shikamaru asked, seeing the glazed look on the blonde’s eyes.

“Everyone that gets close to me ends up getting hurt...what if I hurt Gaara-kun as well?” Naruto asked, those dark eyes turning a jade color and the dark hair turning crimson “I don’t want to lose him too...I  **can’t** lose him too, Shikamaru!” 

“Naruto, have I gotten hurt by being with you?” Shikamaru asked, standing up and moving closer to the blonde “Have you been taking your meds?”

The blonde went quiet, all he could hear was the horns and all he could smell was blood mixed with gasoline and something burning. He was shaking from head to toe.

“ **Naruto!** ”The blonde snapped out of his memories and stared at Shikamaru in shock “You were having a flashback again...I need you to take your medications again, how long has it been since you’ve done that?” 

Naruto looked down at his hands, taking in deep breath before exhaling “...I don’t like the side effect...besides what if Gaara wants to... **_you know..._ ** the medication used to take away my desire for that and always made me feel dizzy.” 

“We’ll keep trying different types of medication until we find one that works for you...I think it might do you some good to start therapy again, we can do it through video chat if you’d like.” Shikamaru watched the blonde and sighed “Sakura is worried about you...and honestly so am I. You looked happy when I saw the two of you just now...and I really do hope that you can move on from what happened. I am speaking right now as your friend and not your therapist. The accident wasn’t your fault Naruto and the more you torture yourself the more you’ll torture those that care about you.”

Naruto ran a hand through his blonde hair, thinking about the redhead, thinking about Sasuke and so many other things. “I don’t want to keep being a burden.” The blonde softly admitted, biting his bottom lip.

“You aren’t...you are one of the strongest people I’ve ever met. Accepting help isn’t being a burden and right now you need help.” Shikamaru softly said.

Naruto looked at his friend/ therapist then sighed “I understand.” He didn’t want to decline...not after coming so far.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya guys! So first off, I'd like to say a massive thank you for the over 300 hits in such a short time, honestly I wasn't expecting such positive results.
> 
> Second, to those that have commented, thank you so much, if I haven't replied please do let me know. They've all given me motivation to write more and post faster.
> 
> Thanks to the guests who have left kudos and King_of_sparrow. Thank you also to himitsuko for bookmarking this story. 
> 
> If I've forgotten anyone, please do let me know ^_^
> 
> Naruto being completely dense to the Shikamaru x Temari situation cracked me up, lol. 
> 
> You guys will be getting 3 chapters today because my OCD refuses to not have a perfect 3 variable, 18 is a nice number. It's also a massive thanks for all the motivation you guys have given me, I've even managed to write up some chapters for Goodbye Kiss but they won't be posted for quite some time yet, sorry if you are also following that story.
> 
> Next chapter, Gaara gets to meet Naruto's most important person.


	17. ch17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaara meets Naruto's precious person.

After talking to Shikamaru, the blonde followed his friend down to the cafeteria. Naruto was looking a bit pale and exhausted which was normal for him after a particularly intense therapy session. 

The blonde smiled when he saw familiar red hair, he stopped to get his ramen and walked toward his partner and Temari.

The beautiful blonde woman turned to look at Naruto when they got closer, she was blushing and looked like she had been crying. Temari got up, glancing at the redhead with a soft smile then at Naruto “...I need to get going...I hope to see you soon, Naruto.” She gave a nod then grabbed Shikamaru’s arm, dragging him off.

Naruto watched her retreating figure before moving to sit down “Your sister is really beautiful...you kinda look like her. Is she alright? She looked like she was crying.”

“She’s fine.” Gaara responded, looking his partner up and down, noticing how exhausted the blonde looked “...Are you?”

Naruto blinked in shock then smiled warmly, moving to squeeze a pale hand “Yes, thank you for coming with me today.” He hesitated, wondering if he ought to ask or not “...I am going somewhere really important after this..would you like to come? There is someone I want you to meet.” 

Gaara was quiet for a moment but nodded, trusting the blonde to tell him if it was important enough. 

“...Can I ask about Temari-san? She seems like a really nice person, if a bit scary.” Thus far the family topic had been something Naruto hadn’t dared to approach.

“...She’s the eldest...and the one that looks most like our mother or so I have heard.” Gaara replied “I...wasn’t a good brother to her...not the way Sakura-san and you are but I’d like to try. You helped me see what is important.”

The blonde felt his cheek and ears reddening, looking at the redhead “I am sure you were a great brother...that you  **are** one. You are really kind, Gaara-kun.” Naruto brightly said.

“There is a lot you don’t know about me Naruto-kun...one day I’ll explain everything...but you might leave.” The redhead looked down, unable to look at his partner.

The blond was surprised by the words, wondering what could be so bad that it made the redhead worry “No matter what you’ve done Gaara-kun...it’s all in the past. I don’t care if you were a killer or if you did anything else that might make the world see you as a monster, to me you are my precious person, believe it!” 

Gaara stared in shock, he hesitated before moving forward, kissing a tanned cheek “Thank you, Naruto-kun.”

The blonde grinned, cupping pale cheeks and pressing their lips against each other affectionately, the worry and stress from earlier fading away. “I should be the one thanking you...and I’d love to learn everything that I can about you. What makes you happy...what makes you sad...angry...everything!”

After that the blonde quickly ate his ramen, then got up and led the redhead toward the top floor. He was hesitant as they neared a room, taking in a deep breath and exhaling.

He opened the door toward the large room, not looking at Gaara’s expression, instead he walked deeper inside. The room was decorated simple except for a fan looking logo right behind the bed and a few pictures.

There was a thin figure hooked to multiple machines, the thin face was framed by dark hair.

Naruto bowed politely to the thin figure “Hey bastard...I am back.” He greeted “It’s been a long time, huh? Sorry bout that...you know how much of an idiot I am.” The blonde walked closer, moving to gently brush a strand of dark hair away and rest their forehead against each other for a moment “I know you can hear me...today I came to introduce you to someone special to me...yeah yeah I know...who could be stupid enough to put up with me, huh?” Naruto chuckled, feeling a lump on his throat but trying to act strong.

“Uchiha Sasuke...meet my precious person Gaara...he’s a lot like you. Both of you are very quiet and smart...except he’s much nicer! Unlike you he doesn’t call me a baka, you teme!” Naruto forced himself to sound cheerful, turning to look at Gaara. “Gaara-kun...this is my best friend Uchiha Sasuke, he’s grumpy, quiet and really smart. He is also Sarada-chan’s father.”

The redhead stared at the thin figure and gave a polite bow of his head. He stared at the sleeping man, this was the person that Naruto cared about so much...the one that the blonde was always talking about.

“Hey teme...how much longer are you planning to sleep for? It’s been almost a decade already...everyone except for Sakura-chan and I have given up on you coming back but I know you’ll wake up...Sakura is trying her best and so am I...but Sarada would be really happy if she got to meet the real you. I want you to tell Gaara embarrassing stories about me...to hear you call me an idiot one more time and...and...I want you to tell me that I am acting like a total loser and taunt me about it.” Naruto stared at the sleeping figure, biting his bottom lip, wanting the raven’s permission so that he could be with the redhead. 

“Kakashi-sensei would be really happy if you woke up...he’s not the same ever since you slipped into a coma...none of us are so wake up...get your ass out of bed and marry Sakura. 

Didn’t you say that you’d like to rebuild the Uchiha clan? Well you have a daughter now...you can marry Sakura and have more kids with her. I won’t ask you to be with me again...I won’t complain or argue. Right now I am really happy with Gaara-kun...didn’t you say that we are brothers? You should be giving me a hard time about finally dating someone, right? Sasuke...Sasuke wake up, please.” But of course the raven didn’t, this wasn’t some reality tv show where they suddenly got a happy reunion or where a miracle would suddenly occur.

Naruto watched the raven with a sad expression on his face, feeling a small hand holding on to his bandaged one. He was grateful that Gaara remained quietly by his side and that the redhead didn’t comment on the tears running down the tan cheeks.

Once the blonde composed himself again, they left the room, heading down to let Sakura know that they were going back to the flat.

Naruto looked up at the sky, feeling the sun shining down on them and took a deep breath then exhaled and grinned “It’s a really wonderful day, isn’t it Gaara-kun?” He brightly asked, acting like everything was perfectly normal.

“You don’t have to hide the ache in your heart when you are with me, Naruto-kun.” The redhead softly said, looking at the beautiful man.

Naruto turned his head and looked at the redhead, the smile turning warmer “Thank you...but I’ll be fine, you are here with me.” 

How could Naruto be so strong? Gaara wanted to ask the blonde but decided not to. He followed his partner toward the ramen shop that the blond was always eagerly talking about. When Naruto introduced the redhead as his precious person, Gaara felt a warmth spread through his body. He really liked hearing stories about the blonde’s childhood. In the ramen shop there were pictures of the blonde with different people and at different ages.

“Naruto-kun is this island hero...when he was still a teenager he defended this place from a dangerous criminal organization that had been going around creating chaos. He risked his life to protect everyone here that’s why we all love him.” The young hostess warmly said “He was...no he  **is** one of the greatest detectives that we’ve known! Everyone was surprised when he left the island instead of becoming the island’s leader.”

The blonde blushed and squirmed “Eh...I just wanted to explore the outside a bit more, ya know? Maybe someday I’ll come back.” If Sasuke ever woke up and forgave him. It just felt wrong to become the leader after what he did.

Once they were done eating ramen, Naruto thanked the chef and waved goodbye, heading toward Sakura’s flat. He showed the redhead where he had grown up, his old flat which still looked the same and had remained abandoned with his friends coming to clean it up whenever they could. He showed the redhead his old training place and the figures of the island’s leaders before him. They had all been great people, some had been the top detectives and some had been other professions as well.

This island was filled with so many memories, some happy and some sad. 

“N-N-Naruto?” A soft voice called out.

The blond stopped and turned, grinning “Hinata-chan!” 

Hinata bowed politely, looking at the redhead and then at Naruto, she was dressed in a long summer dress with a cardigan “I-I am glad you are back...umm h-hello.” She greeted the redhead.

“Ah, this is my precious person, Gaara.” Naruto gave a gentle squeeze to the smaller hand “Gaara-kun this is my friend Hyuuga Hinata.”

Pale eyes stared at each other, due to her pale eyes people often thought that she was blind, which wasn’t too far from the truth.

“Hello.” Gaara greeted, bowing his head politely.

“I-I-I am glad you found someone to make you happy. I-I-If you’d like you can visit Kiba and I.” Her cheeks reddened, looking down at the ground.

“You two are finally together? It’s about time!!! Congratulations, Hinata-chan.” The blonde seemed to glow “Yeah I’d love to visit. I’ll be here for about a week...is it alright if we go for a bit, Gaara-kun?”

The redhead nodded, this was another side of Naruto that he didn’t know. The blonde seemed really happy. 

“I-I am glad….I’ll see you soon. See you later Naruto-kun...G-Gaara-san.” With that Hinata left.

Naruto felt quite happy after that small chat, he still remembers how it had felt to date Hinata. The Hyuuga was always soft spoken but could be quite firm about things. They had been together for about three years until they mutually agreed that it just wasn’t working out, Naruto couldn’t give her the type of affection she wanted and deserved. 

Once at Sakura’s flat, Naruto looked through her fridge while humming “Hey Gaara-kun, what is your home like? Your taste in food isn’t American at all...and it isn’t fully Asian.”

“...My home?”The redhead asked, thinking about what he used to eat growing up, Yashamaru and Temari used to be the cook in the family.

“Hai...here we eat a lot of ramen...fishes, rice and vegetables. What about where you are from?” Naruto was really curious about the redhead, he was glad that he got to see Gaara’s sister and that she seemed to like him as well.

“Hmm...Temari always cooked whatever animal we were able to grow...she often made cactus juices for us.” Gaara never really thought about what he ate, it was just food for him.

“Lucky!!! Iruka-sensei used to buy me ramen whenever I did something good, it was my favorite time.” The blonde decided to go for a glass of milk, pouring a glass for himself “Would you like something to drink?” 

“I am fine, thank you.” The redhead responded, moving to sit down on the couch.

Naruto drank his milk and washed the glass, then went to sit next to his partner, curling up against the smaller body. “...What are your siblings like? What do they like to do? When I was younger one of my biggest wishes was to have lots of siblings that I could talk to and play with.”

Gaara thought about Temari and Kankuro, their relationship has never been good, it’s gotten slightly better after he started reading Naruto’s blog and even he would admit that he’s tried a bit more ever since Naruto and him started dating. “...Temari is strict...Kankuro is...complex.” Perhaps that was the best way to talk about his brother, the relationship between the two of them was still quite tense. “Temari likes collecting fans and Kankuro is a puppet master, he has a small studio filled with puppets.” 

Naruto tried imagining them, humming out “Your family is really creative. I would love to meet Kankuro-san and to properly meet Temari-san! What made you interested in doing sand sculptures?” 

“...The sand makes me think of my mother. When I was born I was wrapped in sand and my mother’s body.” Gaara softly replied, taking in the warmth of Naruto’s body. If someone in the past had said that a monster like him would find a precious person he would have killed them for such foolish words. 

Naruto looked thoughtful for a moment, imagining a newborn Gaara wrapped in sand “I am really happy you were born Gaara-kun...and that we found each other.” He gave the smaller hand a squeeze “And I am grateful that your mother chose to let you live. I don’t think it makes you a monster the fact that she sacrificed herself for you...it means that you are just that precious. No parent would want their child to die.” The blonde thought about his own parents, about how they sacrificed themselves in order to save him.

Precious...it was not a word that Gaara was used to hearing when describing him. How would things have turned out if they had met when they were younger? “Thank you, Naruto-kun.” 

The blonde grinned and nodded, he was glad to be his parents child. They had given up their life to make sure that Naruto stayed safe, it was the type of love that had shaped him. He would like to think that Gaara was the same, that the redhead’s mother loved him so much that she decided to trust Gaara’s father to raise him and give him love. “Alright, it’s your turn to ask me a question.” 

Communication was key in a relationship, that was something that Gaara was learning in his relationship with Naruto. He thought about the question, there were a lot of things he wanted to ask but was unsure how to. 

“How can you be so kind after everything that has happened to you?” Gaara softly asked, feeling warm hands tracing his face. 

The blonde gently traced his lover’s nose and eyes, smiling warmly “I don’t really think I am kind...but I’ve had a lot of kind people support me. Iruka-sensei was the first person to acknowledge me and support my dreams...old man third was always patient with me and treated me like his own grandchild...Sasuke-kun….Sasuke-kun always treated me as an equal and never judged me based on my situation.” 

His hands moved to trace the invisible eyebrows and the kanji “When did you get this?” 

“....I carved it shortly after Uncle Yashamaru’s death to remind me of who and what I was.” The redhead softly responded, feeling his cheeks reddening when he felt warm lips pressed against the kanji. 

“You are beautiful and deserving of love...you are someone who was wanted and who is kind.” Naruto murmured against the kanji. 

“...What if I am not as kind as you think, Naruto-kun _?”  _ The redhead didn’t consider himself to be any of the great things that the blonde mentioned. 

“The whole world can see a monster when looking at you...but I’ll always see my precious person, believe it!” Naruto assured brightly. He cupped the redhead’s cheek and pressed their lips against each other. 

After that the topics became lighter, mostly about food. Naruto wasn’t sure when he dozed off, holding on to the redhead. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting this chapter after rewatching Gaara's backstory hits the feel in a whole different way, I almost forgot how sad Gaara's backstory is.
> 
> As always, please read, comment, leave kudos and bookmarks. They let me know I am doing a good job and gives me motivation to keep going!
> 
> Next chapter is so wholesome, I think it might be one of my all time favorite chapters. Gaara, Sakura, Sarada and Naruto spend some time together. Gaara gets to learn a bit more about Naruto teenage years.


	18. ch18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picnic day! Sakura, Sarada, Gaara and Naruto get to spend some time together. Gaara and Sarada get to learn more about teenage Naruto.

The rest of the week was spent peacefully. They had a day out with Sarada and Sakura, the four going out on a picnic. 

“So, when are you two going to get married?” Sakura had teased which had made Naruto choke on the grape he had been eating.

“W-W-We don’t have that long dating!!! Don’t you think it’s too early to be thinking about that?” The blonde had whined, covering his face. 

“I knew I wanted to marry Sasuke-kun since I was 5...so no, I don’t think it’s too early. You two look at each other like there’s no one else in the world...and well Naru...you are almost 30, I want a cute nephew or niece so get your butt working on forming that family!” The pinkette said with a roll of her eyes, playing with Sarada’s hair “Wouldn’t you want a little cousin to play with and take care of, Sarada-chan?”

“It’s too early!!! A-A-And Sarada-chan is still young, maybe when she’s older….in ten years or something.” The blonde stuttered out, turning to give Gaara a pleading look, as if the redhead could help him. 

“I’ll wait until Naruto-kun is ready.” Gaara said quietly, giving the tan hand a squeeze. He’s never imagined himself with a family of his own nor has he thought of marrying Naruto. They didn’t have that long dating or knowing each other even though it felt as if they’ve known each other all their life. 

“I am a big girl now, Naruto-san. You don’t have to wait if I am the reason, I can even help you take care of the baby.” Sarada pushed her glasses up, trying to look mature “Mama...how do two guys have a baby?” She asked, tilting her head. 

Naruto wondered if jumping off the hill they were closed to would be a less painful conversation.

“Well sweetheart..there are a few ways...they can adopt babies that have no parents...or errm they can get really nice friends to have the babies for them. “ Sakura replied, mindful of the words she was using.

“Will the baby look like Naruto-san or Gaara-san?” Sarada asked curiously, looking at the blonde who looked completely flustered and at the redhead who was looking slightly amused. 

“Who do you want it to look like?” Sakura asked, chuckling. 

“Hmmmm, Naruto-san is really handsome but Gaara-san is handsome too even though his eyes are really pale, his hair is really pretty too.” She quietly replied, looking down at her lap shyly. 

“Gaara-kun is super handsome!!! He’s like a really beautiful porcelain doll and his eyes are really bright and pretty too! In the future if we have kids they should look like him!” Naruto passionately replied, imagining a toddler Gaara. There had been a time when he wanted a big family, back when he was still a kid but now he felt perfectly content with what he had.

“With how advanced that area is, that shouldn’t be a problem. Lady Tsunade has been asking about when you’ll start your own family, Jiraiya-sama wouldn’t have wanted to see you all alone.” Sakura said, then realized what she had said and covered her mouth, giving an apologetic look “...I am sorry.” She knew it was a sensitive topic, anything that had to do with Naruto’s godfather was sensitive. 

“Ha, Pervy Sage would have been trying to sneak inside a hot spring right now while talking to me about the good ol’ single life.” Naruto forced himself to sound cheerful, there was no point in being sad about what happened “It’s fine, it’s been what..12 years already? I am fine, really!” 

Sakura gave a worried look but nodded. 

“Jiraiya-sama? Isn’t he one of the legendary detectives of this island? We were learning about him in class last week.” Sarada said “We have three legendary Sages, Jiraiya-sama also known as the Toad Sage, Tsunade-sama also known as the slug-hime and one of the most beautiful female detectives! The last one is Orochimaru-sama. He's quite scary and is known for his odd experiments, he also goes by the Snake-sage.” Sarada was very much a know-it-all like her mother.

“You are right...your uncle was personally mentored by Jiraiya-sama, they used to travel around together for many years.” Things had been more difficult when they were teenagers yet they had been happy. 

“Ah...that was a long time ago, besides Pervy’s sage so called training was assisting him with his silly book.” The blonde replied with a roll of his eyes and a bittersweet smile. He could still remember having to drag out the white hair male out of public hot springs and rivers, away from all the pretty girls and force the older man to teach him things.

“You were able to use the special toad poison and tracking that he had developed and you are one of a handful of people that can use his toad style martial art.” Sakura stretched and moved to pat the blonde’s head with a warm smile on her face. 

“You can use the toad style martial art, Naruto-san?! May I see it, pretty please...just a little bit, please?!” Sarada begged until she realized that she was probably sounding childish and blushed, clearing her throat “I mean...if you want to.”

“...I don’t know if that’s a good idea, it takes out quite a lot and Naruto...what about your arm?” Sakura said worriedly.

The blonde thought about it, he’s not used that type of martial art in a very long time. Sure he’s practiced quietly by himself but he hasn’t done anything public. “Ah well...I suppose I can try to show you a few moves.” He rubbed the back of his head and straightened up then closed his eyes.

First, he needed to concentrate on the energy that surrounded nature, he wasn’t going to go fully into it. Once his body felt light and he felt connected purely to nature, he opened his eyes and stood up, looking around “By connecting with nature’s energy and mixing your own energy into it, your body is able to be pushed to a new level.” Naruto explained, walking toward a large rock. The blonde gave the large rock a gentle rub then began to pick it up as if it was nothing before setting it down. “One of the perks is being able to gain more strength through training and understanding how nature itself works, take this rock for example...the only reason I was able to pick it up just now is because I was able to feel where it was connected. “ He set the rock back down, inhaling and exhaling slowly before his body started to move.

Each punch was thrown smoothly as was each kick, it looked almost as if he was dancing. There was a swishing sound with each kick and punch, the air moving around it from the force. Once done, he grinned and bowed, he’s not shown nearly enough of what he actually knew but that should be enough to satisfy Sarada’s curiosity.

“Oh wow, that’s amazing, Naruto-san!” The young raven gushed, looking at him with eyes filled with admiration. 

Naruto gave a sheepish smile, glancing at Gaara. He couldn’t read his partner’s face. The blonde grinned when he saw a small smile forming on the redhead’s face. 

“Did I look cool?” He asked teasingly, flashing a thumb’s up. Sarada nodded excitedly along with Sakura. Gaara gave a small nod which made the blonde laugh “Guess I did remember some stuff from my adolescent years.” 

“Well...it was difficult times but thanks to you and everyone else who worked together we were able to stop it.” Sakura softly said, her mind going back to when they had been teenagers in the detective academy...the case that had taken so much from them. There had been a time when their peaceful island had been filled with crime and death, things had been vastly complicated but that was all in the past now. 

“You are included in that, Sakura-chan...if it hadn’t been because of your quick thinking and medical expertise there would have been more casualties.” Naruto softly said, thinking about the pain and hatred he had felt during that case. He shook his head and stretched, putting on one of his bright smiles “Right...so who is starving?” He cheerfully asked.

“Ah wait, I want to take a picture to celebrate our first outing with Gaara-san!” Sakura excitedly said, getting up and taking out her phone “Oh..how do I do this again? Hey idiot, you know how to set this up?” Sakura asked Naruto with a pout.

Sarada giggled, standing up and moving to set up a timer and fix the frame “This is how you do it Mama...you click on this button, set the timer and fix the frame. We have 30 seconds to get in position before the phone takes the picture...are you ready?”

When everyone nodded, Sarada set the timer and ran to her place. Naruto grinned, an arm wrapped around Gaara’s shoulder, his other hand was on top of Sarada’s head. Sakura was smiling somewhat sadly, an arm behind Sarada’s shoulder, her eyes were slightly averted to an empty space, as if she could see Sasuke there. Gaara’s cheeks were slightly red, he was acutely aware of his side pressed up against Naruto’s, he stared at the phone and just as the picture was about to be taken he felt warm lips against his cheeks, a warm smile forming.

Naruto laughed and pulled away, sticking out his tongue “Got’cha, Gaara-kun.” He proudly said.

Sarada went to check the picture and giggled “Gaara-san seems really happy in the picture.” She said, bringing the phone closer so that everyone could see how it came out.

“I got another rare Gaara-kun smile, believe it!” Naruto cheered, hugging his partner and laughing.

“Sheesh Naru-kun, keep it kids friendly. Your eyes say it all.” Sakura teased, laughing when she saw the blonde turn a bright red color. “I’ll get you a copy of this so that you can frame it.” 

“...I am not a pervert, really! I was having pure thoughts...promise!” Naruto whined, feeling his ears reddening “You believe me, right Gaara-kun?” 

The redhead looked amused, glancing away and letting out one of his small chuckles when he saw Naruto’s dramatic reaction.

“Oh no...not you too Gaara-kun...I thought we were closer than that!” Naruto dramatically gasped out, moving to get on his knees and clutch his heart.

“Oh hush up, cha!” Sakura said, moving to hit Naruto upside the head.

While Sakura and Naruto bickered, Sarada stared up at the redhead quietly. She blushed when the redhead looked down at her, making her quickly look down and fix her glasses.

“Yes?” Gaara quietly asked, waiting for the question that he was sure was coming.

Sarada squirmed a bit, tugging on a strand of hair “I...errmm...this will sound quite rude but I promise I am not trying to be rude...I am just curious is all...not that you have to answer but how come you can see even though your eyes look like someone who is blind?” She softly asked.

“...I have an eye condition that makes it so that my eyes look different from others...my uncle said it was due to being born severely premature. As long as I wear specially made contact or glasses I can see just like everyone else.” That was the simple answer to her question. 

Sarada was quiet for a few seconds, taking off her glasses and cleaning them before putting them back on “I got an eye condition as well but Mama doesn’t talk a lot about it. I guess you and I are a bit similar, Gaara-san.” She softly said “I think your eyes are really pretty.” She looked up at him and gave him a warm smile. 

The redhead returned the warm smile, he hesitated for a moment before moving to give Sarada a pat on the head “Thank you.” 

The rest of the day was spent with all 4 of them chatting and seeing the village, it was almost as if they were a family and Gaara couldn’t be happier about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is honestly one of my favorite chapters that I've written, especially the interactions between Sarada and Gaara. A child between Gaara and Naruto would look like Kushina I think, lol. 
> 
> I feel better now that I have my 3s, depending how far I get in my chapter writings I might post some more chapters before the end of the week...we'll see. Right now I am calculating the first half of this story might make it to 50 chapters but we'll see.
> 
> Next chapter is Naruto and Gaara's first fight.
> 
> Also, what type of pairings would you guys like to see for my next story? I've had a few ideas.
> 
> Gaara x Lee, Kakashi x Iruka, another Naruto x Gaara, Neji x Lee, Naruto x Shikamaru or go cliche and do Naruto x Sasuke? 
> 
> Comment and let me know! Until next time ^_^


	19. ch19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto's friends go over to Sakura's place for dinner, Ino opens her big mouth which leads to Gaara and Naruto having their first fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank vanillabeanberry, angetoiles and all the guests who have left Kudos, it means a lot to me especially now when I am having my depressive episodes.
> 
> Thanks to Makala_Shultz for bookmarking this story and thank you guys for helping this story get over 400 hits and so much success [for me it is at least.] 
> 
> And thanks to BinBread again for leaving a comment ^_^ 
> 
> I love comments, they feed my soul also helps me see what I am doing right and what I can work on.

There was only a few days left before they needed to go back home. Sakura had managed to get almost everyone back together for dinner.

Ino had greeted Naruto with a tight hug and kiss on the cheek, Sai had insulted him as always which was as close as anyone could get to a compliment coming from the albino. Choji had admitted that he came only for the food, his daughter ChoCho staring up at the blonde “Wow..you are really handsome.” She had said before being pulled away by Sarada.

Naruto introduced Gaara as his precious person, feeling his cheeks reddening. Sarada and ChoCho had disappeared into the raven’s room to watch some TV drama that they were apparently really into, which left the adults free to talk.

“I am glad you finally found someone, Naru-kun!” Ino brightly said, clapping her hands together “And he’s so handsome...have we met before, you seem really familiar for some reason.”

The redhead shook his head, he couldn’t remember ever meeting her. 

She squinted and kept staring at him but the topic was soon changed as Sakura came with the food and everyone started eating.

Gaara was asked multiple questions ranging from “Why the heck did you choose such an idiot?” Which had come from Sai, all the way to “How did you two meet?!” Which came from Ino and “...So what do you do for a living?” Coming from Karui who was Choji’s wife.

As always, Gaara seemed to avoid the question about what he did for a living. Naruto gave a very short answer as to how they met “At a cafe and the rest is history!” Which wasn’t a full lie, they **_had_ **met for the first time at a cafe.

“Oh hey...did you hear the news?” Ino asked excitedly, going full blown gossip mode.

“Huh?” Naruto tilted his head, moving to help Sakura set the dishes on the dishwasher and clean up.

“Sooo...it turns out my boy Shika is going to be a father soon!” She said as if it was a big, great secret which it was.

“Wait...what?!” Naruto asked in shock, glancing at Gaara who didn’t seem surprised.

“Yeah, so get this! He’s been dating this girl from the nearby island, the sandy one...what was it called again, Sai?” She turned to look at her husband.

“....Sunagakure..” Sai replied, already having heard the story.

“Right, Suna! She comes from royalty or something. Really beautiful, I can’t believe she’s dating a bum like Shika but oh well.” Ino shook her head, not seeming to realize the surprised look Naruto was given her. “Anyways, she’s like some royalty from Suna, her father was the Kazekage. From what I’ve gathered they met a few years back, when we were all still teens, remember that time when the islands nearby had the exam from all the different detective academies? So like they ended up getting paired up during one of the exams. Ugh, I still remember the horror, there was this weird kid that kept killing his opponent, he was from Sunagakure as well...anyways, I was minding my own business when I heard a conversation between the two of them! His girlfriend...I think her name was Tenari? Temaru?”

“...Temari…” Naruto supplied softly.

“Yeah, that’s the name! Temari was talking about how they would paint the nursery and about how her brothers had accepted...wait how do you know her name?” Ino asked with a confused look on her face.

There seems to be a very awkward silence. Sakura was looking at Naruto and Gaara worriedly.

“Did I say something wrong?” Ino asked with a frown, looking between them.

“It's getting pretty late and we have to wake up really early tomorrow, mind if we all catch up another time?” Sakura asked, already moving to kick everyone out.

“What? But the party's just getting good and Naru-kun hasn’t answered my question.” Ino said, trying to understand what was going on.

“Can’t you read the situation, you stupid Ino-pig! You just had to open your big mouth.” Sakura quietly snapped, the two glaring at each other for a moment.

“Well clearly not, Big-Forehead! What the heck is going on?” She replied just as quietly. Naruto was still quiet and looked surprisingly calm about something “Oh shit...I just remembered who that sand guy was that went around killing everyone during the exam.” Ino stared at Gaara in shock, turning pale but was kicked out of Sakura’s flat.

Sarada came out with ChoCho, she had a backpack ready “I’ll be back tomorrow, Mama. Have a good night...goodnight Naruto-san, Gaara-san.” She politely said, before going toward the altar they had for Sasuke, bidding him goodnight and leaving.

“...I am going to leave you two alone so that you can patch this up...if you need me, you know my number.” Sakura calmly said, trying not to show how worried she was “...Naruto...do I need to get Shikamaru?”

The blonde shook his head and smiled at her “It’s fine, Sakura-chan... **I** am fine. You don’t need to leave.” He replied.

“I do...you two need to talk about whatever this is. I’ll be back in a few hours.” With that she left as well.

“...I can explain, Naruto-kun.” Gaara softly said, wondering if he was about to lose the blonde.

“You don’t need to if you don’t want to.” Naruto replied, going back to cleaning. “Ah, so you are going to be an uncle, congratulations!” Naruto forced himself to sound cheerful.

The redhead was royalty? Naruto would be the first one to admit about not knowing his history and geography, he had been a terrible student when it came to the academic stuff. Suna...that was why Gaara’s surname had sounded so familiar.

“I didn’t want you to look at me differently if you found out who I really was.” The redhead softly said.

“Is that who you really think I am?” Naruto asked with a frown “Do you think my feelings for you are so weak that I would judge you due to your lineage?” 

Gaara stayed quiet, looking down at the floor, unable to answer that.

The blonde turned to look at his partner, a frown on his face “Say something, don’t just stay quiet!” 

Gaara was unsure how to explain himself, he’s never been good at forming words.

“...I meant it when I said that I didn’t care about your past. I don’t care if you really were a killer when you were younger, there must have been a reason for it, right?” Naruto gave Gaara a desperate look. “Say something, Gaara! Don’t just shut down on me!” The blonde moved closer to his lover, wrapping his arms around the smaller shoulders, a desperate look on his face.

“....There is nothing to be said.” Gaara calmly replied, refusing to look at his partner.

Naruto bit the inside of his cheek, staring at the redhead, searching for something. “Nothing to be said? You are fucking royalty and you have nothing to say to that? Or the fact that you killed people?” Naruto asked “There must have been a reason, right? You are a kind person...you wouldn’t just keep this all from me if there wasn’t a reason, right?” Naruto begged for an answer.

“You don’t know me, Naruto-kun.” Gaara calmly said “You keep saying that I am not a monster but I am, so stop trying to put your ideals on me.”

The blonde recoiled as if he’s been hit, staring in shock at the redhead, his eyes watering “...Fuck you, Gaara…” He quietly said “You are such an asshole...you...I can’t believe you.” His hands turned into fist “Why do you have so much self-loathing...and why are you trying to push me away? I thought we were getting closer...that I was gaining your trust if only a little bit.” Naruto could feel his cheeks growing wet, he wiped away the tears angrily, looking at his lover. “You won’t give me an explanation?”

“....No…” Gaara calmly replied, trying to ignore the guilt that he was feeling. Naruto would hate him if he found out the full truth, maybe it was best to end things right now “I think it would be wise for us to end our connection right here.”

Naruto felt his eyes widened, wondering if he heard it wrong “....What? Say that again you bastard...I dare you to say that again!” He wrapped his fingers around the front of Gaara’s shirt and lifted him up.

“We are not a good match...tonight just proved it.”Gaara calmly said, refusing to look at Naruto.

The blonde punched the redhead, eyes darkening “At least look at me! How dare you say we aren’t a good match? Then what did all this time together mean to you? Was it really nothing?!”

Gaara stayed quiet, moving to touch his lips and stare at his blood. His eyes became slightly unstable. He walked past the blonde and to their room, grabbing his things.

“Gaara? What are you doing?” The blonde asked, following him “I am sorry I punched you...I won’t ask about anything so don’t go...please?” 

The redhead felt an ache in his heart as he grabbed his passport and some of his clothes then moved to walk past the blonde.

Naruto grabbed the smaller shoulder, pulling him back and hugging his lover “Please Gaara...don’t leave me.” The tanned male begged.

The paler male pulled away “Don’t touch me.” He coldly said, reminding himself that this was for Naruto. Things would end sooner or later, someone like him didn’t deserve to be loved, the few months that he got needed to be enough for him.

“Gaara please...I am sorry...I won’t ask, alright? We can forget the whole night...so please don’t leave me...don’t go!” Naruto begged, moving again to try and stop the redhead but the pale male slapped the tanned hand away and looked at Naruto.

“Just forget we ever met.” Was all the redhead said before leaving.

Naruto chased after him, tears streaming down his cheeks“....Gaara…” The scene changed all of a sudden, he could hear loud honking sounds and see dark eyes staring at him. There was screaming, he could feel himself getting pushed as Sasuke tried to save him. There was also a coldness spreading through his body, the scene changed to one of Sasuke’s back to him **_“You wouldn’t understand dobe...just forget we ever met.”_ ** Sasuke’s voice was cold as he uttered the words.

Next to Sasuke, the blonde saw familiar red hair “...Gaara?” He asked softly “What are you doing next to Sasuke-kun?”

**“ _...Just forget we ever met, Naruto._** **”** The familiar deep voice coldly said.

No matter how much Naruto ran, he couldn’t catch up to them, all he could see was their retreating back.

* * *

The blonde let out a small yawn, rubbing his eyes sleepily. His head hurt and he felt confused, what happened? When Naruto tried to remember, he felt a sharp pain, the last thing that he could remember was talking to Sakura about inviting their friends to dinner. Had he fallen asleep on Gaara again?

He tried to stay awake but found himself dozing off again, the next time that he woke up the blonde felt a familiar cool body, nuzzling a pale neck fondly. “Did I fall asleep on you again, Gaara-kun?” He sleepily slurred.

When he didn’t get a response, he opened his eyes again and looked at the redhead “Is something wrong?” He softly asked.

“Are you feeling better?” The redhead softly asked, moving to cup the blonde’s cheek.

Naruto felt confused, why was Gaara looking at him with such sad and worried eyes? “...Better?”

“You fell asleep.” The redhead simply stated.

Naruto gave a sheepish grin then stopped and squinted “What happened to your mouth? You have a bruise!” 

“I was slightly careless earlier.” It really seemed like the blonde didn’t remember anything. 

* * *

_After their fight, Gaara had been ready to leave and cut all ties with Naruto. He heard a screaming sound coming from the tanned male, then a thudding sound followed by the tanned body convulsing. The pale male had run to the blonde’s side, unsure of what to do. He had called Sakura who had explained what to do and had checked the blonde once she rushed home._

_“Naruto gets non-epileptic seizures due to heightened emotions such as stress. He used to get them sometimes when he was younger but it started getting worse after the accident and other events in his life. We thought that it was finally under control, normally they are not this severe...what happened between you two?” The pinkette looked at the redhead, a frown on her face._

_“I told him it would be best if we ended our relationship.” Gaara replied, unable to look at her._

_Sakura’s eyes widened, she almost punched him but stopped herself when she saw the bruise on his lips, it seems Naruto beat her to it. “How can you do something so stupid, Cha! Do you know how important this relationship is for Naruto?” She snapped at him “...After so many years Naruto finally started smiling and laughing again...he seems genuinely happy with you.”_

_“...If Naruto-kun stays by my side he will only get hurt. Tonight just proved that.” Gaara responded, looking at the closed bedroom door where Naruto was sleeping._

_“If you leave Naruto it will be much worse...I don’t think he’ll be able to handle such a shock, the fact that he had such a severe episode proves it. He probably won’t remember anything that happened tonight. Personally, after what you did tonight I would have happily kicked you out and told you to not bother getting close to Naru...but he needs you, he really cares about you.” Sakura ran a hand through her hair “I lost Sasuke...I can’t lose Naruto as well. If he dies because of you, I don’t care how many people you’ve killed and how tough you think you are...I’ll take great pleasure in slowly torturing you and making you suffer with all of my medical knowledge, Cha!”_

_Had he really taken the wrong course of action by trying to distance himself from the blonde? Gaara had thought that he was helping the blonde by leaving but instead it led to him hurting his partner “I understand.”_

_“If he doesn’t remember what happened...don’t remind him, right now our main priority is stabilizing him and getting Shikamaru to check him. He’ll be feeling confused and exhausted, knowing Naruto it won’t take him too long to realize that he’s had an episode just tell him it was exhaustion. Once Shikamaru has a look at him we can decide what to do next.” Sakura had thought that she had been doing a good job of managing his condition and keeping an eye on Naruto...she shouldn’t have left them alone and told them to talk it out._

_“I don’t care if you really are the son of the Kazekage, you could be the freaking king of the world and I wouldn’t care. I won’t ask you about your past and why you killed people nor if you are still killing people, to me all that matters is keeping Naruto stable and happy, he’s already suffered far too much.” She knew that she hadn’t been helpful in the past, Sakura was the first one to admit that she was weak unlike Sasuke and Naruto who could face danger without being phased by it._

_“You want me to lie to Naruto-kun?” Gaara asked, the image of Naruto screaming and convulsing edge in his mind._

_“It’s not like you weren’t lying to him before. Honestly, I feel like it would be better for you to tell him about who you really are and give him some sort of explanation. Naruto isn’t someone who would judge others based on their past. Luckily he was here this time and I wasn’t too far...but what if he had been home alone? What if you hadn’t acted quickly? Naruto could have gotten seriously injured or even died and that death would have been on your shoulders.”With that Sakura had gone to her room to talk to Shikamaru about what happened._

* * *

Naruto kept looking at the bruise with a worried look “Does it hurt too much? Maybe you should have Sakura take a look at it.”

“I am okay.” Gaara reassured, wrapping his arms around the tanned shoulder and hugging Naruto. He had really thought that he would lose the blonde for a moment.

The blonde was surprised when he was suddenly hugged by the redhead, he knew perfectly well that Gaara hated these types of physical closeness...was he in that much pain?! The blonde hugged back, rubbing the smaller back gently “Did you manage to get some rest? I hope I wasn’t too burdensome.”

“I am okay, you aren’t burdensome at all.” The redhead kept hugging the blonde for a few more seconds then moved to pull away but was pulled closer.

“You smell nice...like the ocean.” The blonde sleepily said “Mind if we stay like this for just one more minute?”

“...Okay…” Gaara took in the familiar citrusy scent, he shifted slightly, trying to get in a more comfortable position.

Naruto moved his head, curling up next to the redhead’s chest to listen to his heartbeat. He was still feeling exhausted, the feeling was quite familiar. His mouth tasted like copper and the inside of his cheeks were rather sore. He shifted, letting their legs wrap around each other, eyes closing.

“...Naruto-kun?” The hoarse voice gently asked.

“Mmmhm?” The blonde let out a sleepy respond, practically tasting his dream.

“Get some rest.” They could talk later, right now it looked like the blonde needed the rest.

It seems that no matter what he did, he would be at risk of losing Naruto...perhaps opening up to the blonde about his life was the only choice he had after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we finally get our first fight between them and Gaara gets to see just how important he is to Naruto. 
> 
> Next chapter we get to see the day after, Naruto also gets to have a sit down with Temari and find out more about Gaara's past. 
> 
> As always, plead read, leave comments, kudos and bookmark. It lets me know that there are people interested and that I should continue this story. I am thinking about writing a prequel once this is done but we'll see. 
> 
> I might post a few more chapter this week depending how far ahead I get in my writing, need to go over a few chapters and fix them.
> 
> I've been rewatching Naruto and holy cow I forgot how scary and unstable they made Gaara when he first appeared [I still loved him cus I felt he was misunderstood...Orochimaru on the other hand *shudders*] I've also been watching The Soprano and a bunch of older shows..man the 90s were good. Okay, imma shut up now. Sorry for the rant XD
> 
> -Y-


	20. ch20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto gets some therapy and he gets to talk to Gaara's sister and learn more about the redhead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys, sorry for the delay. My previous Macbook Mackenzel decided to die a few days ago, the new one arrived today. 
> 
> Thanks to WallMaria_Official, Atermoiement, junkwhoore, not_your_average_garden_hoe, Andil, Aizawa_is_a_hoboOoooo, genzsophie and all the the guests for leaving kudos, I was surprised at how many I got.
> 
> Thanks to evolving_mechanism for their comment ^_^ And thank you all for helping me reach over 500 hits already.
> 
> So while my laptop wasn't working I only had my phone, I am already working on the next story which will be Naru x Gaara but for this story I had to compose multiple songs and if there's anything I learned from the experience is that I am so glad I am not a real songwriter and composer, that job is for masochists.

The next day Naruto was still feeling sluggish. When he woke up, Gaara’s spot was empty but still warm. The blonde got up, letting out a yawn and showering, wondering why he was so tired. 

It took every bit of strength he had not to fall asleep while showering. He heard the door to the bathroom open.

“Naruto-kun?” The familiar hoarse voice called out softly. 

“In here!” The blonde answered, trying to sound cheerful instead of exhausted. 

“Are you okay?” The redhead asked, sounding closer. 

“Huh...yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” The blonde asked, confused. He opened the curtain wide enough to peak at the redhead. “Morning!” 

“You didn’t move too much last night.” Naruto hadn’t been as active, he hadn’t even snored which had worried the redhead. “Good morning.” Jaded eyes were quick to glance away, he didn’t think he was ready to see a naked Naruto just yet. 

“Maybe I am finally maturing!” The blonde chuckled, taking in the view of his partner. The redhead had on a crimson button down shirt with matching pants and a dark grey vest. 

A snorting sound was heard which made the blonde brightened up. Naruto suddenly found himself swaying “...Huh..” 

Next thing the blonde knew he was being held by the redhead, a worried look on his face. “What happened?” Naruto asked confused, feeling a light breeze and realized that he was naked, cheeks reddening. 

“You suddenly started swaying and fell.” Gaara softly replied, jaded green eyes searching the tanned face. 

Naruto frowned, moving to hold his head then moved to get up “I am fine, guess I am not fully awake.” He murmured.

From Naruto’s right shoulder there was an orange tail peaking out. Where his stomach was he had a swirling design tattoo. There were light scars over the tanned, muscular body. 

Gaara was trying not to stare or at the trail of blonde hair that led to a rather private area. 

“...Gaara-kun?” Naruto asked, moving a hand in front of the pale eyes. 

“Can you get up?” The redhead asked, moving to help the blonde.

Cerulean's eyes stared at his partner for a moment before smiling and nodding “Course I can, you enjoying the view from up there?” Naruto joked with a wiggle of his eyebrows. When the redhead started blushing, Naruto chuckled and moved to get up.

He ended up needing some help, Gaara seeing the rest of the tattoo. It looked like a snarling orange fox with multiple tails that stretched through the tanned back. 

“...The Kitsune on your back looks like your avatar...is there a special meaning behind it?” Gaara softly asked, giving Naruto a towel so that he could cover up. 

They walked to the bedroom where Gaara got Naruto his clothes. 

“That’s Kurama...I guess you can call him my inner demon. The tails represent me overcoming certain trials and gaining a tail out of it, like a fox spirit.” Naruto explained “And the seal in my stomach represents me sealing my demon...it’s also a tribute to my mother’s family which were known to be priests and priestesses that would seal away evil spirits during the feudal era.” 

“Was it painful?” Gaara wanted to trace the tattoos, he would have never guessed that the blonde would have any. The redhead turned away to give the blonde privacy while he changed. 

Naruto put on his boxers and clothes on, once done he moved to hug Gaara from behind, kissing his cheek affectionately **_‘Forget we ever met.’_ ** Naruto blinked when he heard Gaara’s voice saying those words, it had sounded distant and cold. He felt a sharp pain in his head. 

“Naruto-kun?” The blonde blinked, pressing their cheek against each other. 

“The back tattoo was a bit painful, mostly the bone area but the stomach one didn’t hurt. “ Naruto replied, giving the smaller shoulders a squeeze before pulling away. 

“Okay, I am done lazing around! Have you had your coffee?” Naruto brightly asked. 

“Sakura-chan gave me a bit.” The redhead replied “Can you make me a cup?”

The blonde nodded happily, moving to open the door.

“Hey.” Came a lazy greeting, Naruto’s eyes widening when he saw Shikamaru. 

“Hey blondie.” Temari greeted, waving with a grin. 

“What are you guys doing here?” Naruto asked, looking at both of them “Not that I don’t want to see you two!” He added, waving his hands. ‘ **_Did you hear...my boy Shika is going to be a father.’_ ** Why did he hear Ino’s voice say that? “Shika….you are going to be a dad?” Naruto asked confused, feeling another sharp pain on his head. 

“Ah...yeah.” Why did Shika sound slightly worried? “Why don’t you sit down, Naruto...do you two mind giving us a sec?” 

“Ah, I should show Gaara the sonogram!!”Temari was quick to say. Before Naruto could protest, the Suna siblings disappeared inside the bedroom. 

Naruto sat down on the couch, across from Shikamaru “I...had another episode, didn’t I?” The blonde softly asked, looking down at his lap in shame.

“It’s nothing to be ashamed about. We all deal with our suppressed emotions differently.” Shikamaru calmly said. 

“...What happened?” Naruto asked, trying to remember but only felt a sharp pain on his head. 

“What do you recall?” The brunette asked, quietly observing his friend. 

“....I remember Sakura making plans to get everyone together for dinner.” Why did his head hurt so much? 

“What else?” Shikamaru needed to push just a bit more.

“....I heard Ino’s voice saying you were going to be a dad….and Gaara’s voice telling me we should have never met.” The blonde’s breathing was starting to become laboured, he could practically taste what was about to happen. Naruto snapped out of it when he started hearing the clicking of a lighter, starting to relax. 

“You are in a space where nothing bad can touch you...you are safe. We are going to enter the chambers of your memories, okay?” The voice sounded soothing and calm.

“Okay.” Naruto breathed out, eyes half-lid. 

“We are going to dive shortly before the episode happened...what can you see?” Shikamaru kept his voice smooth and gentle, clicking his lighter. 

“....Ino, Sai, Choji and his wife are sitting...we are laughing and chatting.” The blonde replied in a daze.

“Good...you are doing really good Naruto...what else do you see or hear?” Shikamaru watched his friend carefully, keeping his voice quiet.

“...Gaara-kun, he’s right next to me...he’s quiet but he seems content.” Naruto answered.

“We are gonna jump forward to right before the episode...remember no matter what happens you are safe, nothing bad can happen to you.” The therapist waited for a second “Tell me what happened leading to the episode.”

“....Ino said you were going to be a father...she’s talking about Temari...something about her being royalty or something….daughter of Kazekage.” Naruto began “....She said something about Gaara killing people when we were younger….now Gaara and I are alone and….and…” The blonde felt a sharp pain, moving to grab his head. 

Shikamaru began to click the lighter and trace a pattern with the flames “You are safe….keep going Naruto...you are doing great.”

Panting softly, Naruto gathered his strength. “We are fighting...I don’t understand….Gaara...Gaara…” Naruto tried to reach out to the redhead. 

The next thing Naruto knew, he was staring at Shikamaru and feeling exhausted. “Welcome back.” The lazy male had an unlit cigarette between his lips. “I said I was gonna quit this...ain’t so good for the baby and Temari keeps telling me to give it up….who would have guessed I’d be a dad, huh? I wonder if I’ll be as good as my old man. I always said I wouldn’t end up with a nagging woman like my mother but here I am.” 

Naruto listened quietly, giving a weak chuckle “I think you’ll be a great dad, you helped raise Asuma-sensei and Kurenai’s sensei kid.” 

“I wouldn’t really say I helped raise Mirai-chan.” Shikamaru ran a hand through his hair, looking lazily at the ceiling. 

“I still remember the time Kurenai-sensei got sick while pregnant. We had been in the middle of a mission, you finished it in record time and brought her to a hospital, then stayed by her side until you were sure that they would be okay. You’ll be an amazing father.” 

The two of them shared a look and grinned. 

“But we are screwed if your kid ends up as lazy as you, we don’t need another Shikamaru.” Naruto added with a laugh.

“Hey, it will be worse if they get Temari’s temper. That woman is mad.” The two chuckled, each imagining Shikamaru’s kid. 

“Where is Gaara and Temari?” The blonde asked, tilting his head. 

“Temari wanted to talk to him about the baby. Probably talking about how the kid will be raised.” The brunette got up and stretched before heading toward the bedroom and knocking on the door.

Temari opened it, a hand on her hip “You finally done? I had to hold him back from coming out.” 

“Yeah, we are done. He’s stable for now, don’t talk about what happened. If he asks about it just mention Ino saying I was becoming a dad then everyone went home. I won’t say anything as Naruto’s therapist...but as his friend I’ll say only this...he’s already gone through a lot, his mind won’t be able to handle much more.” The brunette sighed and began to head back to Naruto.

Temari smiled brightly “Soooo Naruto-kun, what do you want to know about my cute little brother?” She cooed “I’ll tell you anything you want to know.” 

“....Anything?” Naruto softly asked. 

“Yup, anything.” She brightly said “In return, tell me every embarrassing story you got about this bum!”

“Deal!” Naruto brightly said “How was he as a kid?” He shyly asked.

“As a kid? You don’t want to know any embarrassing stories?” She grinned and laughed, moving to sit next to him “Oi Shika, get your beautiful fiancé some water.” 

“Bossy woman.” Shikamaru grumbled, moving to do as he was told “This isn’t your house”

“Shut up or else you’ll sleep outside tonight.” Temari replied. “Gaara was a really cute and quiet kid, he used to be really soft spoken and quiet much like he is now. Our father used to spoil him rotten at first but we weren’t allowed to play with him.” Temari’s smile saddened a bit, feeling guilty, a hand moving to rub her stomach.

“How come you weren’t allowed to play with him?” Naruto asked, tilting his head, wondering if he was intruding on the redhead’s privacy but Gaara didn’t try to stop the conversation.

Temari looked at Gaara and then at Shikamaru, when she got a nod from both of them, she let out a soft sigh. “When Gaara was born, it was said that he got the spirit of the sand, Shukaku, who used to be a priest. In our island, Shukaku is considered to be sacred but also something to fear, our father thought that he could turn Gaara into a soldier, especially after our mother died giving birth to him. 

Our uncle Yashamaru...who was our mother’s younger brother, ended up raising Gaara but we weren’t allowed to interact too much with Gaara. As far as our father was concerned, Gaara was the answer to his prayer and the key to making our poor island become powerful once more. I did a terrible job as his big sister...instead of protecting him from our father’s grief and giving him a normal childhood I ended up contributing to it.” She let out a shaky breath, trying to control her emotions. 

“Kankuro and I ended up leaving Gaara alone to deal with things that no child should have dealt with...I thought I was doing a good job by leaving him alone but the truth was I was relieved that I hadn’t been chosen and I think...I think a part of me resented Gaara for our mother’s death even though she had been so happy about his birth. I still remember how she would take Kankuro and I to get clothes made for Gaara...and how she used to talk about what type of person he would be. Out of the three of us, I might look the most like our mother but Gaara is the closest to her when it comes to kindness.” She already had that conversation with Gaara already, having begged for forgiveness.

Naruto’s eyes had watered and he was sniffing, taking a napkin given by Shikamaru “That’s so terrible! I am so glad you guys could patch things up!!!!” Naruto practically sobbed out.

“It’s thanks to you that we were able to fix things. Honestly, you are the best thing that has happened to our family! Gaara doesn’t like using our family name or saying where he’s from because he doesn’t want to be seen as our father...our father doesn’t have the best of reputation.” She moved to hold Naruto’s hands “I’ll ask you this as his big sister...please take care of him. I know he’s hard to get along with and that he has a talent for pushing everyone away...but he does care about you.”

“....Temari…” There was a slight warning tone to Gaara’s voice.

“I know...blame these stupid hormones. Kankuro would be having a blast if he got to see how freaking emotional I am getting.” Sne sniffed, turning to glare at Shikamaru “This is all your fault!” 

“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of Gaara-kun, believe it!” Naruto promised “Wait..what’s wrong with the surname Suna? I think it’s quite cool.” 

Shikamaru sighed out and shook his head, Naruto could be so dense “It takes two to make a kid.” He told Temari, lifting his hands up in defense when he saw the glare directed at him. “Their surname is Suna...like Sunagakure island. Their father was the fourth Kazekage and also the CEO of Suna Corps, the largest export of sand in the world, they also exported gold. Sunagakure or Suna as it’s often called, is known for having detectives that are powerful trackers and also good at hiding, I bet you slept through that class too.” Shikamaru shook his head. He had calculated what would be the least risky way of telling Naruto somewhat the truth while mixing it with the real memories and this seemed like the best outcome.

“....Wait, you two are the elders kids?!” Naruto asked in surprise, eyes widening. He looked at Temari and then at Gaara who was looking away and didn’t look too comfortable.

“I am sorry I didn’t tell you, Naruto-kun.” The redhead softly said, remembering the fight and how he had tried to run away.

“Not like we got special treatment cus of it.” Temari grumbled “Our father could be very viscous and we were used as part of his plan. He forced Gaara to kill people, threatening Gaara with our life and telling us that inside of Gaara there was an evil spirit named Shukaku who would destroy us all, it's not that Gaara liked killing others, he mostly did it out of self-defense or because he was forced to.” She shuddered as she remembered Shukaku, those unstable eyes and the way her little brother looked covered in blood. 

It had been about 6 years or so that she had noticed her brother slowly changing and almost half a year ago when she noticed a much bigger change. Gaara had tried interacting with them more and had seemed...warmer. “Shikamaru said that you used to be an outcast when you were younger...that you understand the pain Gaara went through...you didn’t even have siblings that could have protected you yet you ended up turning out amazing. I am sure your parents would have been proud of the man you became.” Temari smiled warmly then shook her head “Alright, I need to go and take care of some stuff for the kid, you’ll be spare from more of my hormonal talk...but really Naruto-san, thank you for watching over my little brother.” The blonde woman gave a deep bow before moving to kiss Gaara’s forehead, seeing the redhead recoil and flinch “You two will be alright...it’s your turn to be happy, Gaara.” She softly said to him before grabbing Shikamaru’s arm and dragging him away.

Naruto was quiet for a few seconds, sniffing and then he moved to tackle Gaara when he heard a soft “Naruto-kun?”

“Don’t worry Gaara-kun, I’ll give you all the love your papa didn’t give you!” He sniffed “I really am glad that you were born...and that we are together, thank you for choosing to be with me...and trusting me with something so private.” Naruto gave a warm smile, pressing their forehead against each other.

Gaara felt his cheeks reddening, he felt guilty over the fight they had and that he was the only one who remembered. “Thank you for being with me.” The redhead softly said.

Naruto laughed, wrapping his arms around the smaller shoulders “Oh...Oh man, we sound so weird! Thanking each other so politely for being together, I am half waiting for Temari to come back and call you my bride.” the blonde gasped out between laughs.

A snorting sound was heard “Only you would see me as a bride...shouldn’t you be afraid of me for being a killer?”

“Why? You didn’t do it out of malice, you did it due to your personal situation and feel remorseful over it, I think that guarantees forgiveness, don’t you? Hatred will only create a vicious cycle of vengeance...but forgiveness can help us all understand each other and be compassionate.” Naruto said, running his fingers through the auburn locks, kissing the kanji “It's time for you to forgive yourself for everything that happened...it’s not your fault.” 

Cerulean blue eyes stared at the jaded ones, smiling warmly before pressing their lips against each other “You are not alone anymore...I’ll always be by your side.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love writing Temari, one day I might just manage to write a Shika x Temari story.
> 
> Next chapter, Naruto and Gaara celebrate their 10 month anniversary!


	21. ch21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto & Gaara celebrate their 10 month anniversary, something unexpected comes up.

_ “Dear Kyuubi, _

_ I am in a wonderful relationship with someone I consider to be my best friend...but I can’t help but feel like it’s going to end. A few years back I was in a really bad accident and lost most of my memories. It was my best friend/ partner who was there for me when I needed someone and who helped me regain most of my memories back. I really enjoy being with this person...but why do I keep having such a sinking feeling? _

_ Is it all in my mind? _

_ Please help! _

**_Amnesticheart_ **

* * *

_ Dear, Amnesticheart _

_ First, I want to thank you for reaching out to me! I am glad to hear that you got most of your memories back and that there was someone there to help you through such a tough time. _

_ Now on to your question, is the sinking feeling you have all in your mind? I think that as humans, it is only normal for some of us to experience fear or doubt when things are going well if we are not used to that being the case. It is part of our instinct to search for the worst of a situation, not only so that we can guard our heart but also because it was a way for our ancestors to survive. _

_ For now, I’ll ask you to focus on the positive and when those fearful thoughts come to your mind, thank it for trying to protect you and then let it go...or sit with it for a moment but don’t let it consume you. _

_ Let me know how things go, believe it! _

**_XoXo Kyuubi XoXo_ ** _ ” _

After the trip to Sakura, their relationship seemed to have gotten stronger, whenever Gaara wasn’t busy working they would end up going on dates. The blonde’s favorite one had been to a ramen shop he had discovered, Naruto was spending more time in Gaara’s flat instead of his house. 

The months seemed to fly by in a blink of an eye, their ten month anniversary was nearing. Temari had been excited about it, after their conversation, they had clicked and talked practically every day. She had opted for finding out the gender of the baby at the time of birth, saying that it made things more exciting. 

Naruto also had weekly therapy sessions with Shikamaru, it would leave the blonde feeling exhausted for a few days afterwards but he didn’t want to relapse, not when everything was finally going so well.

For their ten month anniversary, Naruto had planned a rather romantic dinner at Gaara’s flat. The redhead would be busy with work but had promised to be back in time for their anniversary.

Naruto had first cleaned up the whole house, he had gotten some of that cactus wine that Gaara loved so much and had tried to follow the recipe that Temari left him to cook some of his partner’s favorite dishes. He had it all planned out! First, they would have a romantic dinner together, they’d have a bit of wine and then they would watch a movie or two together and if everything went smooth, they would end up in bed celebrating!

The blonde had showered, put on tight fitted blue jeans that he knew showed off his bum rather nicely along with his favorite, long sleeve orange shirt that showed off his muscular body and had tried to fix that unruly hair to no luck.

Things had started off well, when Gaara had come, Naruto had greeted him with a hug and a kiss on the lips “Happy ten month anniversary!” He excitedly said.

“Happy ten month anniversary, Naruto-kun.” Gaara had replied with a warm smile, kissing back softly and passing a small bag to him.

“For me? You shouldn’t have!” Naruto was quick to go and get his present, the cactus wine and gave it happily to his lover “Temari-chan helped me get it from Suna...I hope it’s to your liking!” Then he burst out laughing “Sorry, I just remembered when you asked me out to that art gallery...and I gave you that Christmas Cactus, remember? Back when I didn’t know that it meant lust.” The blonde kept chuckling, hearing a snort.

“I remember.” The redhead replied with a fond look on his face. “I am sure it will be to my liking...anything you give me is something I will cherish.”

Naruto felt his cheeks reddening, leading Gaara toward the table, setting his present down on his side then brought the food over. “I tried to follow Temari’s recipe as closely as possible...but I am not sure if it worked out too well.” He admitted, rubbing the back of his head and moving to sit down. He opened the present that Gaara had given him, eyes widening as he stared at the bright orange sweater with the black line, there was a black swirling design in the back, inside the sweater, in the corner there was the kanji for love. Naruto was quick to put it on, grinning “How does it look?” He asked excitedly, standing up and turning around.

“It suits you.” Gaara replied with a warm smile, glad that Naruto liked his present.

“Thank you so much, Gaara-kun...I really do love it! I’ll cherish it forever!” He promised.

“I am glad you like it...thank you for going out of your way to cook my favorite foods, I am sure it is delicious.” Gaara was glad for his poker face when he saw the practically burned meat.

Those cerulean eyes stared hopefully, filling up the redhead’s plate first and then his own “Go on...have a taste and let me know. At first they kept coming out undercooked and then too red, hopefully third time's the charm...right?” 

Gaara hesitated for a moment before moving to take a bite of the tongue. His eyes widened slightly, it tasted as if he was drowning in salt. The redhead coughed, grateful when he was given some of the wine and quickly drinking it.

“.....Is it that bad?” Naruto asked with a pout “I knew it...I really can’t cook your favorite dishes.”

“No...it is not that bad.” Gaara assured, moving to take a bite of the gizzard...at least he thought that was what it was meant to be. The taste of too much salt and carbon hit the redhead, coughing again, eyes watering a bit.

“......Here, have some more wine. It’s really bad, isn’t it?” Naruto looked dejected.

“It’s….interesting.” Was all that Gaara could reply, drinking more of the wine and going back to trying to eat everything on his plate.

“You don’t have to force yourself.” Naruto assured, moving to taste it as well then quickly threw it out, grabbing the vase of wine and drinking from it like it was water, coughing out. “Gaara-kun, you should have just said that it was terrible! That thing isn’t edible!!!!”

“Naruto-kun made it for me so it's delicious.” Gaara replied but the blonde took the food away with a bright blush.

“As grateful as I am for those kind words...I don’t need you dying from food poisoning because of me.” The blonde threw the food away, mentally asking for forgiveness, knowing very well what it was like to go hungry. “I’ll make you one of my precious red bean flavoured soup.” He went to his cupboard..or more like the one he had ended up taking as his own, then took out a chicken flavored ramen cup and a red bean soup one and boiled some water.

“Thank you for trying to cook my favorite dishes, I truly appreciate it.” Gaara gave a polite bow of his head, even after almost a year of dating they could both be extremely polite and formal with each other.

Naruto added the boiling water to both cups and let it set, moving toward the redhead and kissing his cheek sweetly “You are welcome, next time it will taste better!” There was no way that the blonde was about to give up, he wasn’t a quitter!

“I am looking forward to tasting it.” Even if it had been a bit too salty, Gaara was happy that Naruto had tried to make his favorite dishes, he just hoped that the next time it didn’t send him to the emergency room.

Naruto had insisted on them having their food with the wine while watching one of the blonde’s favorite movies of some ninja hero who went around defeating different bad guys with a power the hero had to summon wild creatures.

Aside from the terrible food, everything was going according to plan, the blonde had lowered the lights, raised the volume up just a tad bit and had curled up against the redhead while they watched the movie. He was thinking about how to make his next move, first he let out a yawn and stretched an arm forward, resting it right behind the redhead’s shoulder. He kept it there for a little bit, setting his now empty cup of ramen down on the table and filling up the small glass of wine for both of them, this time drinking it much more slowly.

As the movie progressed so did his moves, Naruto held his breath as he moved to rest the top of his head on the small shoulder, hyper aware of their breathing. Gaara sounded so calm and seemed completely oblivious over what he was trying to do. ‘ **_Wow kid...you really have become a pervert like that Pervy Sage._ ** _ ’  _ The familiar voice of his inner demon teased him _ ‘I am not a pervert! I just...want to be a bit more affectionate, that’s all!’ _ Naruto mentally replied, as if he was talking to a real person and not himself.

The blonde shifted slightly, with the light from the TV he had the perfect view of the pale face and those jaded pupiless eyes that were staring at it, which were quick to shift to him. “Hm?”

Naruto quickly shook his head, smiling brightly and turning to look at the movie again. By now the hero was dealing with a particularly nasty villain and it looked as if he might lose the battle. The blonde felt warmer than usual, he tried to control his heartbeat, gathering his courage, reminding himself that he wasn’t some sort of virgin, he was Naruto Uzumaki, believe it!

After gathering his courage, warm lips pressed against a pale neck, giving it soft kisses up to his earlobe, feeling a shiver escape his lover’s body “Neh Gaara-kun...I wonder just how sensitive your body is.” He whispered in the redhead’s ear, grateful for the darkness. His whole face was a bright red color and he honestly couldn’t believe he just said those words!

The blonde grinned when he saw Gaara’s eyes widening for a moment, those jaded eyes turning to look at him before the redhead was tackled. Naruto straddled the smaller body, rubbing their nose against each other affectionately “You are so beautiful, Gaara-kun...I want to be able to see every bit of you and worship your body.” He murmured, a tanned hand slipping underneath a crimson shirt. He felt cool skin, his partner squirming underneath him.

“N-Naruto-kun.” Gaara breathed out, biting his bottom lip. It was almost laughable how sensitive his skin was to Naruto touches. The redhead wasn’t sure if he was ready to take the next step. What if he did it wrong...or what if Naruto didn’t like it?

The tanned hand moved up the pale skin, toward one of the nipples, kissing down the pale neck, the sound of the movie in the background. “You can touch me if you want.” The blonde nuzzled the pale neck to cover his red face, begging his heartbeat to slow down. 

Naruto shivered when he felt cool hands sliding inside his shirt and toward his side, letting Gaara take off his jacket and long sleeve shirt. Personally, Naruto wasn’t the biggest fan of his body but he had seen the way that the redhead stared at him sometimes. The blonde unbuttoned the crimson shirt, biting his bottom lip, drinking in the view. “You are so perfect, Gaara-kun...we’ll only go as far as you want, okay?” He didn’t want to push the redhead into something that he might not want.

The redhead nodded “...Okay..” Came the murmured reply “I trust you, Naruto-kun.” And he did, the blonde was like a sun that showed the way for Gaara.

Pale hands kept tracing the tanned body, rubbing the tattooed back, a gasp escaping the redhead’s lips when his neck was bitten. Gaara was unsure why it felt good but it did, it made his body feel warm and tingling “Naruto-kun.” The redhead breathed out.

“Ga-Ah shit!” The blonde was surprised when the door suddenly opened and they were hit with light. He was sure that it was a robber, practically falling off the couch and trying to stand up so that he could fight the intruder.

“Hey lil’bro, get your cactus in a line cus I am about to turn your world!” A voice brightly said “You really need to learn to lighten up your flat, how the heck are you gonna get anything from blondie when you live like this?” 

Naruto stared in shock at a man with purple markings on his face and dressed in black. The blonde was quick to grab his sweater and put it on.

“So guess what...you remember those old farts? Well now they want you to get mar-” Kankuro blinked at the scene in front of him. There was a blonde guy with a backward sweater and red face...Kankuro managed to see familiar spiky hair and a hint of pale skin.

“Sorry, I didn’t know you were finally getting laid...Temari owes me 20 bucks!” Kankuro laughed when he heard a growling sound, not seeming ashamed of what he was seeing. “I’ll come back later to give you the news.”

“N-No it’s alright...I should go and errmm...buy us milk, yeah!” Naruto wondered if it was possible to die from embarrassment.

“Naruto-kun...you don’t have to go.” The redhead began to button his shirt, moving to grab the tanned hand and give it a squeeze “It’s too late for you to be going out.” Gaara thought about drowning his older brother in his sand room, that might teach the older man to not come in without knocking or at least letting him know.

“You are not too bad looking, blondie...I can kinda see why my brother might like you.” Kankuro winked at Naruto and chuckled, heading toward the kitchen.

“Why are you here?” Gaara’s voice was cold, jaded eyes glaring at his brother.

Kankuro shuddered, opening the fridge and looking around “...I thought Temari said she sent you some of the good wine.” The puppet master grumbled.

“ **Kankuro.** ” That seemed to make the older man stiffen up and show his hands up defensively.

“Got it...got it, sheesh. I’ll make it quick so that you can go back to getting laid with blondie. Like I was saying, now that Temari is preggos with one of those Konoha-smelly brats and we are having a half Konoha smelly brat, the old farts are getting their panties in a bunch and have demanded that you get marry to some woman of their choosing and give them a heir that’s from Suna. I told them that you’d never agree to it, especially now that you got blondie here, not that I mentioned that blondie is a guy or any other detail, anyways! 

Now they want to meet your partner and want you to hurry up and give them a heir pronto. That’s all I came to tell ya. I’ll go stay at a hotel tonight, enjoy yourself and make sure to leave me some proof so that I can collect my 20 bucks from Temari.” With that, the puppet master gave a two finger salute and left just as easily as he had come.

“...A heir?” Naruto asked with a frown, wondering how likely they were to accept adoption.

“Do not worry about it...I need to go and take care of this. I am sorry, Naruto-kun...we were meant to celebrate our anniversary.” The redhead gave an apologetic look but the blonde smiled warmly and shook his head.

“There’s nothing for you to apologize for...go and take care of it, I’ll be fine.” Naruto assured, moving to hug the redhead “But please remember to try and get some sleep. I’ll stay here and wait for your return.” 

Naruto kept assuring Gaara that he was fine, he stopped the redhead and fixed his shirt with a chuckle “Don’t worry, we can continue where we left off.” He teased with a wink, laughing when he saw the blush on those pale cheeks. He let their forehead press against each other for a moment “Please be safe...make sure to come back to me.” 

Gaara nodded slowly, letting their nose rub against each other, wishing that he could stay curl up against the blonde. With a soft sigh and one last apologetic look, the redhead left, taking out his phone to call Kankuro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kankuro is such a cockblocker lol, One day Naruto will be able to have Gaara...one day XD Also, I am starting to think that cacti was spot on, Naruto is definitely the one lusting.
> 
> Next chapter, Naruto misses Gaara and Sarada goes to stay with the blonde for holidays.


	22. ch22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto gets to spend time with Sarada during her holiday, he also struggles with missing Gaara.

**_“Dear Kyuubi,_ **

**_I’ve found out that I am going to be a parent all of a sudden, my best friend passed away leaving me as the guardian of their child...but I know nothing about being a parent especially when it's the opposite gender! I’ve turned my office into their new room but that’s all I’ve managed to do._ **

**_What does it take to be a good parent? The child is still rather young and I am worried about ruining everything especially since it's the last thing I have of my precious best friend who was like a sibling to me and more to me._ **

**Kind Regards,**

**-ParenLess-**

* * *

  
  


**_Dear ParenLess,_ **

**_First, I wanted to apologize for your loss, it's never easy losing someone no matter the reason behind it. I think your friend was showing how much they trust you by leaving you in charge of their child._ **

**_Now...what makes a good parent? I can’t say I am an expert on the subject but I do know what it's like to take care of a precious friend child. First thing is first, the pain that you are feeling for the loss of your friend is one that the child will also be feeling, make sure to be patient and listen. They might cry out for their parents and try searching for your friend, I am unsure how much the child knows and exactly how old the child is...but if they are still rather young and don’t understand what heaven is, let them know that their parent is somewhere lovely where they can watch over the child._ **

**_I think that’s one of the most important things needed to raise a child...patience. The second one is communication, that child is another human being, it’s someone that has feelings just like you and their own experience which is shaping them up, if they get angry or are upset...or if you are angry or upset, don’t just snap instead listen and communicate. Ask them what is making them feel that way, let them know that they won’t be alone and that you two can be a family._ **

**_In order to be a good parent I don’t think you need money or vast knowledge, I think so long as you are kind and try your best, knowing that it won’t be easy but it will be worth it at the end...well I think that’s what makes it all worth it and can make you such a great parent._ **

**_On the materialistic thing, I think it’s something you can ask the child or maybe you two can do together, you can focus on decorating the room and buying clothes as well as food together, it will help the two of you understand each other more, believe it!_ **

**_Good luck and do let me know how things turn out or if you need any more help!_ **

**_XoXo Kyuubi XoXo”_ **

It's already been two weeks since Gaara had to suddenly leave and Naruto felt like he was going crazy. Texting has proven to be a challenge in itself thanks to the terrible connection in Suna which Gaara had warned him about, he’s barely been able to talk to his lover which made him feel anxious even though he knew it was silly.

The blonde had a strict schedule in place to try and control himself, in the morning he would make his coffee, shower and send a text to Gaara wishing him a good morning, then he would change into his running clothes, drink his first cup of coffee and run around the neighborhood for half an hour to an hour. When he came back he would shower again, change into more casual clothes and answer some questions in the blog and then he would clean the house, by evening he would send Gaara another text asking how his day has been and then he’d make himself some ramen, going back to checking on his blog. By evening time he would head to the gym to work out and come back by night time, wondering when he would see the redhead again.

His chest ache without the quiet man by his side, making him laugh and feel cared for. Sometimes the nagging little voice in his head would tell him that Gaara wasn’t coming back, that the redhead got fed up with him and was going to accept the marriage proposal but Naruto kept telling himself that it wasn’t true...it couldn’t be true.

He was extremely grateful when Sakura asked him if Sarada could go and stay for a month or two, Sakura was increasingly busy and Sarada’s holidays had started. It was a tradition for the younger girl to stay with Naruto so long as the blonde made sure that the younger Uchiha called her mother every single day and went to sleep at the specified time that Sakura asked.

“I am sorry Naruto, I thought we had set it up earlier than this...it’s alright if you can’t.” Sakura said with a worried tone in her voice.

“Not at all! I am more than happy to spend some time with Sarada-chan, you know how much I love her. When is her plane meant to arrive?” He asked, thinking about where they would stay, deciding that his house was the safer option, he wasn’t sure how happy Gaara would be coming back to seeing Sarada in his home, or anyone else for the matter.

“She’ll be going by the end of the week, I really thought I had informed you and sent you the flight details but it seems that I forgot. I am sooo sorry!” Sakura sounded exhausted, as if she was the one that hasn’t been sleeping at all.

“Really it’s fine Saku-chan. I’ll have my place ready in time. We can go running together...and to the amusement park...we can go ice skating and to that nice ramen place that Gaara and I discovered!” Now Naruto was getting excited, he could really use the company.

“Don’t feed her only ramen, Naru! Remember not to take her anywhere too crowded, you know her vision is poor and that she gets sick far too often...you know **_his_ ** bloodline, sometimes I get scared that she’ll get the same sickness as **_him_ ** or that she goes down the path he chose if I am not careful. I-I know it's terrible of me but I am not strong like the two of you, I’ve never been strong like that.” She was terrified that with one wrong move Sarada would choose a path of being a criminal or that she would start going blind as well.

“You are one of the strongest people I’ve ever known and you have your right to worry. I promise I’ll keep a watch on her, I don’t think she’ll end up doing what he did, she’s had love and a family, something that he and I didn’t get to have when we were younger. Things are different now Sakura...we are different.” He assured her.

“Yeah...yeah you are right, things are different now. Thank you, Naru.” She sighed out, wondering if she should mention the change in Sasuke’s condition or not.

“How is he, anyways?” Naruto softly asked, looking at his computer screen, seeing words but not reading them, instead he imagined a familiar raven.

“...” Sakura hesitated, wondering if it would be smart to tell Naruto or not, then decided against it, the blonde was finally starting to be happy “Same as always, you know...I am sorry.” She would free Naruto from the jail he created for himself, it was probably best if the blonde forgot about Sasuke.

“You are not the one that needs to be sorry...I’ll talk to you next time.” With that, they hung up the phone. Naruto send Gaara a text message letting him know that Sarada would be staying with him for a while and that he was going to be in his house.

He sighed when he got no reply nor did it show that the redhead had read it. Naruto made sure the house was perfectly clean and that he had his spare key before leaving, feeling exhausted. There was a feeling of dread creeping up on him, what if Gaara never came back to him? Things had been going well, they had even managed to celebrate their ten month anniversary and Gaara had promised to come back...but what if it had all been a lie?

The blonde shook his head, reminding himself that the redhead wasn’t one to lie and that relationships were built on trust, he couldn’t let himself slip, not now.

* * *

Naruto waited eagerly for Sarada to arrive, he had a small bouquet of flowers for her, Cherry Blossoms to be more specific, as well as a small gift he had wrapped up. When he saw familiar raven hair and red glasses walking with one of the airline’s staff assigned to take a child from one place to another, he walked closer, showing his ID and a letter from Sakura that showed he was her guardian during the trip. He gave the lady a tip and a charming smile “Thank you for looking after her throughout her travel, have a nice day!” He said.

Once it was just the two of them, he gave the little girl her presents, chuckling when he felt small arms around his waist “Thank you, Naruto-san!” Sarada happily said, looking up at him.

Her eyes were so much like Sasuke’s yet they also had hints of Sakura in it. The blonde smiled warmly, moving to pat her head “You are very welcome, Sarada-chan.” He softly said “I figured you’d probably want to rest today. Shall we go to our special place first or would you rather go to sleep?” He asked her, moving to crouch down and offer his back to her.

She blushed brightly at the offered back “I-I am a big girl now, Naruto-san. You don’t have to carry me anymore!” She pushed her glasses up, trying to stop blushing.

Naruto chuckled and waited “I know you are a big girl but you’ll always be my cute little niece. Hop on.” When he felt small arms around his neck and then small legs wrapping around him, he stood up, holding on to her legs. 

“If it's alright I’d like to stop by our special place, we always stop there when I come and visit.” She replied, being careful of the small bouquet she got and of her other present. “How come Gaara-san isn’t with you?” She innocently asked, looking around for the familiar redhead.

“Ah...he’s away on a business trip for a little while.” The tanned male responded softly, heading toward the exit. Even though it was only morning, the sun was up and rather bright. Luckily, he hadn’t parked too far away from the terminal.

“...Oh...I see.” She sounded disappointed for a moment, chin resting on his shoulder.

They were quiet after that for a moment, Naruto searching for his car, once they arrived at the bright orange mini-cooper, he crouched back down, opening the door for her once he straightened up and she got off. He made sure her seatbelt was properly on, then went to the driver seat and put on her favorite radio station. While he drove, they talked about her trip and how things were at school. Naruto laughing as he heard about Iruka-sensei who was now the headmaster of the academy “Iruka-sensei never changes...man I can still remember how he used to chase after me when I was a kid and drag me back by an ear while telling me that I would need to clean up my latest prank. Your father...he was a much better student than me, he never got in trouble and everyone loved him. Your mother was always the smartest one in the academy. She saved your father and my life multiple times during our missions and was always levelheaded like your father.” For Naruto it was important that Sarada knew all of Sasuke's good points, sure he had made a few mistakes and had been quite rebellious for a while but everyone went through a rebellious phase! 

“Lee-sensei said Papa was one of the best fighters he’s ever seen. I want to be as good as Papa!” She made sure to practice every single day and as hard as she could.

“I am sure you will be, you are already super smart like both of your parents and kind like them.” Naruto gently responded, for a moment wondering how different things would be if Sasuke had been the one raising Sarada and practicing with her. 

Sarada smiled softly and looked down, pushing her glasses up. She like being able to spend time with Naruto, he was the coolest adult she’s ever met and he was super nice as well, he also treated her as his equal instead of treating her like a child, something she appreciated, she was nine already!

Naruto slowed down when he made it to the familiar restaurants, if it could be called that. It was located on their way from the airport at a petrol stop. The shop sold teas and coffee, they always stopped there to get a drink. Sarada got black tea while Naruto got milky coffee, sitting down close to the door, it made Naruto think of the cafe he went with Gaara when they first met, that felt like such a long time ago.

“Is the tea good?” Naruto brightly asked, moving to sip his coffee only to get his tongue burned, nose wrinkling at the pain. One day he would be able to drink his coffee without burning his tongue.

“It’s delicious! I really love this place.” Sarada responded, looking at him worriedly when he burned his tongue “Are you okay, Naruto-san?”

“I am fine, I am fine..sadly I am too used to this.” He responded and chuckled. “Oh right! You were telling me about a mystery book you have been reading, where are you now?” 

“Oh...right! It turns out that the two best friends and rivals are actually brothers! One of them has turned into a vampire prince while the other one is the prince of the demon, based on the hints they gave us the readers we thought that it was the demon prince that was dropping all those bodies but now I am starting to wonder. The killer has been going only after children but leaves their body in different states of decomposition and they each suffer different injuries but the vampire prince has noticed that there’s always very thin needle points at the back of their necks or somewhere easy to hide it. “ She sounded excited as she explained it “But I feel like there is something else we are still missing. For example, why a needle? And why is it specifically children that are being targeted? I’ve come up with a few different theories but I am just not sure about it.” She admitted with a sigh.

“Wow, that sounds really interesting! I’ll have to catch up on the book, sadly I am still in the beginning when he’s still working in the circus after leaving home and everyone believing he’s dead.” Naruto moved to take a sip of his coffee once more, glad when this time his tongue wasn’t burned. “But you are right, it is interesting...why a needle point? Is it to subdue them or is it for another reason?” Even though Sarada was only 9 years old, she was extremely smart, while she wasn’t allowed to read super gory stuff, Sakura did let her read mystery books since the younger Uchiha had expressed interest in wanting to be a detective when she’s older. 

  
_If only Naruto had known at that time how relevant that book would become to him in the near future._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the relationship between Sarada and Naruto. We are almost entering the second part of the story. I am checking all the chapters again and seeing which needs fixing, as of right now we are almost at 40 chapters and no where near done but we'll see.
> 
> Next chapter, Naruto struggles with Gaara being away and what the future might hold for the two of them.
> 
> Plead read, bookmark, leave kudos and comments. They motivate me and show me that there are people enjoying this story. I'll probably post the next chapters on Monday.


	23. ch23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto hears some bad news that makes him doubt his relationship with Gaara, he also spends time with Sarada.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Mini_Naruto and the guests who left kudos ^_^
> 
> Thanks also to July and evolving_mechanism for their comments, I really appreciate it. And thanks to everyone who is still reading this story, I am honestly surprised at all the positive feedback it's been getting.

_“Dear Kyuubi,_

_You are probably tired of hearing about relationships, so I’ll start off by apologizing. I met someone a few months back and things are starting to get serious...but there is an issue. The two of us come from different cultures and races, recently their family has been talking about wanting to meet me...but they don’t know about the difference in culture and race. Our people have a history of not liking each other and going to war, I am scared that once they see me, they’ll try to tear us apart._

_…..Should I just end it now or should I go and fight? I am scared but maybe it would be best to lose my S.O now instead of making them suffer later on._

_Thank you in advance,_

_TCW :(_

* * *

_Dear TCW:(,_

_First I want to assure you that I never get tired of hearing about relationships, I am a sucker for romance :) Second, I wanted to thank you for having the courage to talk about this and reaching out, I am grateful that you placed your trust on me._

_It seems that you really like this person...in life there will always be people who find it hard to understand difference and accept it. Like my godfather used to say, this world has so much hatred but also so much compassion, it is up to us the individual to stop the cycle of hatred by taking the first step. Don’t go in thinking the worst, instead go in with the best mentality possible. Let’s sketch out some scenarios, yeah?_

  1. _You go and meet your S.O family and they can’t stand you, they curse you out and it’s pure chaos. That’s okay, all I’ll ask is that instead of rightfully getting angry and snapping at them, for you to take a moment and put yourself in their shoes, they are acting like that over their love for your S.O of course that doesn’t mean you just have to take their negativity, instead let them know that they are forgiven and give them time to come around to the thought of your relationship. Tell them that you are grateful that they care enough about your S.O to act out like that...but that you truly love that person and plan to stay by your partner’s side._
  2. _You go and everything is nice and dandy, they love you and you love them, everyone gets along!_
  3. _You go and they like you but you don’t like them for some reason, just remember that they are the bridge to your partner and you. Have patience and come in with a heart of kindness, it’s compassion that moves the world, believe it!_
  4. _You decide to end things because you are scared...will that make you happy? Will it make your S.O happy? I think you shouldn’t make such a delicate decision by yourself, communication in a relationship is the most important thing._



_Please do let me know how it goes, you can respond here or through email, I’ll be waiting to hear from you and wishing you the best of luck with everything!_

**_XoXo Kyuubi XoXo”_ **

  
  
  


After they had their drink, Naruto took Sarada back to his house, Sakura had sent her luggage ahead so that the younger girl didn’t need to carry it, all the raven brought with her had been a backpack with some of her books and her documents. 

Sarada left her backpack in the spare room that Naruto had, she took out the picture she had of her father and put it in her nightstand, giving a bow to it “We are here, Papa! Thank you for protecting me during the trip.” She stared at the smiling young man who had the same onyx hair and eyes as her, he looked confident of himself and as if he was teasing someone. Once she had put her bags down and found her change of clothes, she went to take a shower.

Naruto decided to make some omelette, biting on his bottom lip and wondering when Gaara would return. He added some stirred vegetables to the omelette, flipping it with ease, telling himself that it hasn’t even been a month, they’ve gone longer without seeing each other! He put on a fresh pot of coffee and some decaf black tea for Sarada. By the time he heard the small footsteps nearing, he had the omelettes ready and their drinks set. 

“ _Thank you for the food!_ ” They both said, smiling at each other before focusing on eating, Sarada moving to turn on the TV so that they could listen to their news, another little habit they had developed.

“In today’s news, Oil prices are going up...people are outraged! Relief being sent to thousands after the tragedy of the beach front and Senator Bowie set to resign after the scandal of last week, later on we’ll have Andy Browns with this week's forecast!

Hello everyone, I am your host Charlotte Dove, thank you for choosing to watch us!

Breaking news, the heir to the Suna Corps is set to marry heiress Mitsuki Ao, sources say that they have gotten engaged recently and the wedding day will be set soon. 

Mitsuki, 24, is known for her successful modelling and acting career as well as her amazing sense for business. Her father, Kenji Ao, is the CEO of Ao Corps which are known for their big trade deals.

This will surely be the wedding of the centur-”Naruto moved to change the channel, putting on some morning cartoons instead.

“Oh wow...I can’t believe Miss Ao is getting married, she’s one of my favorite actresses! She worked on the drama adaptation of ‘FrankStein & I, a modern monster love tale! In it she was in love with the main guy who was actually a monster that was created from a magical wood. She was a detective who was trying to discover why FrankStein had been created.” Sarada gushed until she caught herself, clearing her throat and drinking some of her tea “S-sorry...I got a bit too excited.”

Naruto was quiet for a minute or two, Kankuro had said that the elders had someone they wanted Gaara to marry...and now the news was talking about a wedding even though the redhead had promised him that they’d stay together. Was he thinking too much into it? No...it had to be a rumor, a mindless rumor but she was really pretty and clearly talented, she would also be able to give Gaara something that Naruto was incapable of which was an heir.

“Naruto-kun?” Sarada asked worriedly, looking at the blonde who looked rather upset.

Cerulean blue eyes quickly moved to stare at onyx ones, for a moment seeing his best friend **_‘Two guys were never meant to be together.’_ **What if Sasuke had been right after all? Shakily, he grabbed his mug and drank his coffee, forcing a smile on his face “She seems like an amazing person.” Naruto said, trying not to think of his redhead with someone else...and someone so pretty at that. 

He felt foolish for the way that he was acting, it was childish, didn’t he trust Gaara? Beside, if it was true he couldn’t be needy and beg the redhead to stay with him, he would need to act mature and wave the smaller male away with a bright smile and wishing him happiness.

Wasn’t he meant to be alone, anyways? There was nothing bad with being single, it meant that he could focus more of his energy on being there for Sakura and Sarada, he could move somewhere else, maybe somewhere near the beach where Sarada would be able to have fun when she came to visit him. Somewhere far away from the redhead and their memories.

Why did his chest ache so much? It felt as if he couldn’t breath and as if he was drowning. Naruto tried to focus on Sarada’s words, she was talking about another work that Miss Ao had been in and how talented the heiress was.

How was he supposed to compete against that? When Sarada asked if she could be excused to read for a little bit in her room, Naruto smiled and nodded “We’ll be going to the bookshop in the evening, I’ll be in my room if you need me before that.” With a wave he watched her go to her bedroom then let out a soft sigh.

Naruto tried to distract himself with the blog, answering some questions, trying not to think of Gaara leaving him for good.

During his session with Shikamaru an hour or so later, he hesitated for a moment, not wanting to come off as needy “...Have you heard anything about Gaara? There was a silly story in the news about him getting married to a heiress but they must be wrong, right?” 

Shikamaru let out a soft sigh, running a hand through his hair “Gaara is fine...you know the connection is bad there.” It was better not to talk about the complicated stuff with the blonde, he was finally starting to make progress. 

“Yeah...I am just being insecure, sorry.” Naruto looked down and rubbed the back of his neck. 

“There is nothing to apologize for, you are in your right to worry, Naruto. “ The brunette assured him.

“Is Temari and the baby doing alright?I saw a really cute toy for the baby.” The blonde smiled brightly, deciding to drop the subject. Shikamaru was always telling him in therapy to change his way of thinking and he was always repeating the advice to his readers.

“....That woman is crazy, she almost threw my Shogi board at me last night...apparently I got her the wrong type of chestnut, man what a drag.” Shikamaru rubs his face “The baby is alright, doesn’t really do much of anything...according to a book Temari was reading on parenting, babies are supposed to be kickers while inside the belly or something.”

“Maybe the baby has your lazy personality.” Naruto teased and laughed “What type of chestnut were you supposed to get her and what type did you actually get?”

“Hmm...maybe.” Temari had said the same thing to him “She wanted sweet chestnut...according to her it wasn’t sweet enough.”

Naruto covered his mouth but was unable to stop his laughter, his worries from earlier were gone. The more perverted side of his brain went toward a rather childish joke.

“Grow up.” The brunette lightly scolded but chuckled as well.

“Never….I don’t want to be told to grow up!” The blonde stuck out his tongue childishly and kept laughing. “Oh hey...quick question before I forget. Do you think Temari might have a picture of their mother? I wanted to ask Sai to do one of those paintings he did like that one time you guys gifted me a painting of my parents with me.” 

Shikamaru thought about it and hummed “I’ll ask her today and let you know.”

“Sai can do those fancy pictures of mixing two different pictures into one as well, right?” The guy might have a terrible personality but he was talented and a good friend.

“Yeah, it's called photoshop.” Shikamaru turned to look just outside of the camera and sighed “Maaan, what a drag, I gotta go Naru, Temari woke up from her nap. I’ll chat with you later.”

“See ya, give Temari-chan a hug and a kiss for me!” With that they ended the videochat. 

Naruto stretched and looked at the time, he left his bedroom, knocking on Sarada’s door. When he didn’t hear anything, he opened it as quietly as possible, a warm smile on his face when he saw that she was sleeping, the book he had given her was pressed against her chest, glasses half off. 

He got closer, taking her glasses off carefully then set it down by the picture of Sasuke. He remembered that day, Sasuke had been smirking at him, teasing the blonde about something. Naruto had stuck out his tongue and taken the picture.

  
  


**_TBC_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is finally a sex one...sorry it's not Naruto x Gaara yet but that's coming soon. Next chapter is a Sasuke x Naruto flashback chapter, it will also explain a bit on why Naruto has certain thoughts about relationships and sex. I'll apologize in advance for the very shitty sex scene.


	24. ch24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto x Sasuke flashback chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys, so this is a flashback chapter and will include a sex scene. Some stuff may be considered dark or uncomfortable.
> 
> Kinks included are: Choking, Biting and a light spank. This will also be drunken sex so if any of this makes you uncomfortable you can skip the scene. I'll put a line from where the sex scene start until where it ends. 
> 
> This is also underage sex, they are about 16-17 when this happened.
> 
> I'll also love to see if anyone finds a small clue I left.
> 
> Sasuke's ringtone is the hetalia song "Tomato song." Sang by South Italy.

**Naruto stretched and looked at the time, he left his bedroom, knocking on Sarada’s door. When he didn’t hear anything, he opened it as quietly as possible, a warm smile on his face when he saw that she was sleeping, the book he had given her was pressed against her chest, glasses half off.**

**He got closer, taking her glasses off carefully then set it down by the picture of Sasuke. He remembered that day, Sasuke had been smirking at him, teasing the blonde about something. Naruto had stuck out his tongue and taken the picture.**

* * *

_Naruto couldn’t believe his best friend, they were in NYC and were meant to be spending time together but the raven had wandered off to do his own thing. He sulked, walking past 23rd street while grumbling about the Teme and how unfair he was being. It was rather windy, the first time they had come he had complained about it with Sasuke teasing him over it._

_His phone rang, the familiar ringtone that he had set for his best friend_ **_‘Buono! Tomato buono Tomato Buono buono uu! To-_ ** **_”_ **Naruto let it ring for one more second and then picked up “What do you want, Teme?” He grumbled out, trying not to bump into people, in this city it felt like everyone always had somewhere to go and they couldn’t slow down.

“Hn...should I call another time?” Sasuke asked, sounding as calm as ever and as if he hadn’t just ruined their perfect plan.

“I thought you said you were too busy to talk today and that you had loads of stuff to do, Teme!” Naruto sniffed, walking past 30th street and 7th ave.

“Where are you now?” Sasuke completely ignored his friend’s dig, it was so easy to frustrate Naruto.

“I am at...Ano….32nd and 7th Ave.” He responded “Why?”

“Come to 10th street and 3rd ave.” With that Sasuke hung up.

Naruto growled and dialed back, having to turn around, wondering why he thought it would be a smart idea to come to NYC with Sasuke, that bastard was always doing whatever he wanted!

“What?” Was how Sasuke greeted him, sounding bored.

“Don’t ‘What?’ me! You just hung up on me, why shoul-''That bastard hung up on him again. He was going to beat up the raven that should teach the Teme a thing or two.

Once Naruto made it to 10th street and 3rd ave, he looked around, growling when he saw his best friend, stomping toward the raven and getting ready to say a thing or two but stopped when he saw what was behind Sasuke. It was a homey looking Japanese restaurant.

“Took you long enough, Idiot.” Sasuke said with a smirk, he was dressed in dark from head to toe with a black leather jacket, a plain black shirt, black skinny jeans and boots, his hair in its usual duck style.

“What are we doing here?” Naruto asked, forgetting about his anger, cerulean blue eyes looking up and down the slim figure.

“What do you think we are doing? It’s a place to eat so we are going to eat.” Sasuke rolled his eyes and walked inside where a hostess greeted them then led them toward a table. 

Naruto's eyes widened when he saw ramen and grinned, looking at his best friend “You are treating me?” He asked excitedly.

“I brought you here, didn’t I?” Sasuke asked, looking at the menu.

The blonde cheered, looking at the different ramen selections “I want the Miso ramen with extra pork and large!” He was practically jumping in his seat, tilting his head when he heard a light chuckle. “What’s so funny, teme?” He asked, glaring at his best friend.

“You get too excited for ramen like a total idiot.” The raven teased, rolling his eyes when Naruto stuck his tongue out.

“Or maybe you just don’t get excited enough about it, ever thought about that?” Naruto jokes “But really, how come we are here? I mean, not that I mind or anything, I’ll always say yes to ramen.”

“Just because.” Sasuke replied, turning to look at the waitress when she got near “I’ll have an order of onigiri bento with okaka and extra tomatoes...and a green tea.”

“I’ll have the Miso ramen, extra large and with extra pork!Actually, can you get me two portions of that? To drink I’ll start off with red bean bubble tea also large.” Naruto happily ordered, the waitress wrote it down and nodded “Right away, Sirs.” 

Before she left, Sasuke stopped her “Bring us a warm vase of Sake, large.” She looked between them, when Naruto offered his charming smile she faltered and nodded, they looked old enough and also extremely handsome “Yes, Sir~” She replied, walking away.

“What’s the occasion for us drinking, Teme?” Naruto asked, wondering why Sasuke was being so nice all of a sudden...or could it be that the raven was feeling bad about leaving him alone?

“Hn.” Was the response the blonde got.

Naruto chuckled, staring at his best friend “You missed me that much, huh?” He joked, the annoyance from earlier was completely gone. He was just glad that he got to spend some time with his best friend.

“You wish.” Sasuke huffed out, staring at the blonde, a slight smile on his face.

Naruto squirmed, feeling his cheeks turn bright red “W-W-What is it, teme? Do I have something in my face?” 

Sasuke chuckled and shook his head, seeming to be in a good mood. When the alcohol was brought, he stood up and poured a bit on the small cup for Naruto, the blonde moving to do the same thing with a grin then they toasted.

“To us and being together again!” Naruto brightly said, downing the drink quickly “Gaahhh, so good!” He shook his head, his throat and stomach feeling like it was burning.

“To us.” Sasuke toasted, downing his shot as well, nose twitching but he didn’t show how strong the sake was, he was much better at having a poker face then the blonde.

Naruto still didn’t understand why the raven was being so nice but decided to go with it and started talking to his best friend about a shop he had found, it was a traditional looking Japanese bookshop and in front there was a nice, big park where they could go and sit. He was just grateful that Sasuke had come back to them after being part of a criminal organization for so long. It had been difficult and honestly, Naruto had wondered at times if he would be able to save his best friend, but they were together again and Sasuke has been doing well. 

When the food was brought they ate and talked, Naruto ordering a vase of sake as well. Cerulean blue eyes stared at bright crimson hair which was spiky, following the small figure quietly.

“What is it, Baka?” Sasuke asked, tilting his head slightly and following the blonde’s eyes where he saw spiky crimson hair before turning to look back at his friend.

“I wonder if it's real.” Naruto asked in awe, glancing away from the figure in the corner, he had a scary aura about him.

“Probably not.” Sasuke replied, cheeks already flushed, a slight smile on his face.

“Yeah...probably not.” Naruto echoed with a grin, knowing perfectly well that he was at least tipsy. His hands moved to cup pale cheeks, squeezing them “Sasuke...you are so pretty like a girl...but like more masculine.” He cooed.

Sasuke huffed, moving to slap a hand away “And that’s how we know you are clearly drunk.” The raven shook his head, lifting a finger to call the waitress “Two black coffee, no sugar.” He ordered.

Naruto pouted, staring at his best friend before quickly standing up “I am not drunk and I’ll prove it...I am gonna go to the toilet!”He might have said the last part a bit too loud, stumbling toward the bathroom.

It took a few tries for him to open the door, going inside and struggling to pull down his zipper. Naruto felt a familiar presence behind him, cheeks reddening as slim, pale hands moved to unzip his pants.

“Tch, I told you that you were drunk, I bet you can’t even aim right. You soo owe me for this, Baka.” Sasuke’s familiar cool voice murmured next to his ear.

The blonde jumped slightly, his hand moving to pull the pale one away “I-I-I can do it myself!” He squeaked out.

“You clearly can’t since you even struggled to open the door, now hurry up idiot, I am aiming all you have to do is shoot.” Sasuke didn’t seem too phased over holding his best friend’s dick, aiming carefully.

Once the blonde did his business, Sasuke shook it a bit and grumbled about having to babysit the blonde and how lightweight Naruto was. 

The slightly taller male turned around, staring at those onyx eyes then closed the distance between them, a tan hand wrapping around dark locks, pressing their body closer to each other while they kissed.

After a moment of hesitating, the raven kissed back hungrily, wrapping an arm around his friend’s hip. It was probably the alcohol making them do what they were doing, or at least that would be the excuse used. 

Naruto moaned out lowly, grinding against the raven, a hand going to slip inside the dark shirt and touch the pale skin. They both suddenly pulled away when the door opened, turning to look with wide eyes at the person that almost caught them.

Crimson hair was the first thing they both saw followed by dark sunglasses and pale skin. It was the young man from earlier who had caught Naruto’s eyes.

The blonde gave a sheepish smile “Ya didn’t see anything, did ya?” He asked but they got no response as the redhead disappeared into a stall.

Sasuke fixed his clothes and so did Naruto, the blonde chuckling and using his friend as support when they got out of the bathroom. The raven paid for their food and called a taxi to take them back to their hotel.

The blonde couldn’t stop giggling, nuzzling his best friend’s neck.

“What’s so funny, moron?” Sasuke huffed out, starting to feel the alcohol now, maybe they shouldn’t have had so many shots.

“Oh man...I am just thinking about how we probably looked to that guy, like two little kids that had tried to take a cookie when they weren’t supposed to.” Naruto said, letting out a snort.

“Speak for yourself...beside he didn’t look so innocent himself. I bet you are too drunk to notice the weird tattoo on his forehead.” Sasuke had to keep stopping Naruto from getting too handsy in the taxi, he paid and led the blonde past the doors and to the elevators. 

“I am totally speaking for myself...and you!” The blonde giggled “Sassuuuu-kkuuuunn~”

“...What?” The raven asked, feeling a hand grope his butt “Oi, baka watch where you are touching!”

“But you are so pretty, Saaasss-UKE~” He burst out laughing at his own joke, shaking his head.

Sasuke growled, tugging on the blonde locks “You are such an idiot!” The elevator door opens, the raven dragging his friend toward their shared ensuite.

“And you are such an Uke, Saasss-UKE!” Naruto kept giggling, letting out a squeaking sound when he was suddenly slammed against the wall as soon as he was inside their room. 

The raven locked the doors and slammed his best friend against the wall, crushing their lips against each other. Both of their hands started moving to undress each other. Naruto would be the first one to admit how affectionate he became when he was drunk. While Sasuke was still quiet, he definitely got more affectionate and laid back, it was like they could both drop down their walls.

Naruto moved to wrap his fingers around the dark locks, biting down on Sasuke’s bottom lip, hips arching forward.

“You are so childish, Naruto.”Sasuke huffed, slamming his friend’s hips back.

“And you are so grumpy.” Naruto happily replied, trying to arch his hips but couldn’t “Sasssuuu...stop being a bully! I want to feel you.” He whined, tugging on the dark strands harder, refusing to give in just yet.

They glared at each other for a moment, neither wanting to give up just yet. Naruto brought his hands down, squeezing the pale rear, trying again to arche his hips and get some friction between them. “Stop being such a tease, Teme.” The blonde whined.

Sasuke felt a shiver run down his spine, hyper aware of the warm hands squeezing his ass, staring at the needy look that Naruto had. The blonde was always so expressive and open, Sasuke didn’t understand how Naruto did it. He crushed their lips against each other roughly, pressing their arousal against each other, groaning out at the friction. One of his hands moved to trace the muscular chest, his thumb rubbing one of the nipples and getting rewarded with a rather needy sound. They made out for a few minutes before Sasuke led them toward the large bed, pushing the blonde down. 

Seeing Naruto spread out for him, face flushed and those blue eyes looking bright...it made Sasuke’s body feel warmer. “Stay.” He ordered, going toward his luggage which was open, he felt around the small pockets then took out the lube, turning to look at the blonde.

Naruto groaned out, moving to touch himself while he waited “Sasuke...hurry up.” He whined out, stroking his length, lips parted slightly.

* * *

“I didn’t say that you can touch yourself, Baka. Hands off.” Sasuke ordered, smirking when he saw the blonde obey him without question. “Good boy.” He got closer, squirting some of the clear gel on his hand, stroking the taller male’s length with it then did the same for his own. He moved to straddle his best friend, letting their cock rub against each other more smoothly, nuzzling the tan skin.

Naruto moaned out needily, holding on to Sasuke, loving the feeling of their body against each other, perhaps the trip had been worth it after all. His large hands slid down the pale back, scratching down it and snickering for a moment, until he felt his neck get bitten which made him moan out “Y-You are playing dirty, Teme!”

“You are the one scratching me, Baka!” Sasuke shot back, licking the spot where he had bitten down then kissed down the tan body. He could feel the larger hands exploring his body, his ass getting squeezed “You are really an ass man, huh.” He joked.

“And you’d probably love to have my mouth wrap around your cock.” Naruto shot back smugly, cheeks bright red. The blonde pulled his best friend closer, spreading his legs wider “Stop being such a tease, Sasuke!”

“Hm.” The raven rose an eyebrow, looking highly amused, watching the blonde squirm underneath him. His lips wrapped around one of the sensitive nipples, biting down and tugging on it, loving the reaction he got when Naruto’s moan grew louder and the blonde arched. It was so easy to please his best friend. 

Naruto decided to fight back, bringing a hand down to spank the pale ass, looking smug for only a moment as he watched the shock expression on the raven’s face.

“Did you...Did you just **_spank_ ** me?!” Sasuke asked surprised, face reddening, it hadn’t been a particularly hard one but there had been a bit of a sting to it and he would secretly admit only to himself that he had liked it.

“And you bit my nipple, I’d call it even.” Naruto retorted, rubbing the pink butt cheek, another moan escaping his lips when his other nipple was bitten and sucked on.

They kept bickering while exploring each other's body, starting to roll around the bed, each trying to outdo the other. A surprised sound was let out when they both fell off the bed, Naruto laughing and rubbing his head, their legs intertwined.

“Its not funny idiot...are you hurt?” Sasuke asked, trying to untangle himself from the taller body but fell on top of Naruto with a grunt.

“It’s plenty funny, Sasu-sweetie~” Naruto teased “Wouldn’t have happened if you had just given in, ya know?”

“Ugh, don’t call me that and it’s your fault for being so stubborn.” Sasuke huffed out, trying to look annoyed but failed miserably. After a moment of the two struggling, Sasuke trying to untangle himself from the taller body and Naruto trying to keep him in place, they managed to find a compromise and pull away. “Try not to fall again.” 

“I can’t help falling for you all the time, Sassss-UKKKEEE~” Was the childish reply that Sasuke got back. The blonde jumped on the bed, looking rather happy and patting the side next to him “Well you gonna stare at me all night or you joining me?”

Sasuke huffed, moving to lay next to the blonde, his cheeks getting cupped, the blonde giving him a gentle look.

“You are so beautiful Sasuke….so fucking beautiful.” Naruto breathed out, resting their forehead against each other “I am really glad you’ve come back to me...I wish we could be together like this forever and ever.”

“Why would you want to be with me, Naruto? All I do is hurt you each and every time...all I do is hurt everyone that cares about me.” Sasuke responded with a frown, voice going quiet.

Naruto shook his head, rubbing their nose against each other and letting their lips brush against each other “No you don’t...you’ve always acted as my strength. It’s thanks to you that I feel like I can be anything I want to.” The blonde quietly replied.

“Listen Naru...I am not strong like you...the fact that I went with Orochimaru should teach you at least that much...I am broken goods. I can’t give you what you want!” Sasuke still had nightmares about the experiments and the things he saw in the lab.

“All I want is you, Sasu...as long as you are by my side, I am happy.” Naruto pulled Sasuke closer to him, letting their body rub against each other. “Take me Sasuke...I want you to have all of me.” The blonde could feel his cheeks reddening as he uttered those words but it was true, he wanted Sasuke to have every inch of him both physically and mentally.

The smaller male seemed to hesitate for a moment but nodded. He grabbed the lube, squirting some more on his hands and some on the pucker hole, when the first finger traced the small hole, he watched Naruto push toward it, his index finger pushing against the tight hole. The sensation was...interesting. It was warm and silky, he kept pushing past the muscles, watching the blonde’s expression.

“I am fine...really, you can keep going.” Naruto assured, giving a warm smile and pressing back toward the finger. 

The raven took his time, not wanting to hurt his best friend, he pushed the finger inside slowly, feeling Naruto start to thrust against the finger with a groan. 

“Even your finger feels good, Sasu~ I want to feel every inch of you...I want us to become one.” Naruto begged, thrusting more against the finger, his eyes closed. When Sasuke entered a second one it took a moment to adjust. For a moment the room was filled with Naruto’s needy sound and Sasuke’s heavy breathing, the smaller male kissing down the tan body.

When the third finger finally entered him, Naruto moaned out and begged Sasuke to just take him, he didn’t think he could last much longer. His cock was leaking pre-cum and his body felt like it was on fire.

When those fingers pulled away, the blonde shifted and grinned, he could feel the tip of his best friend’s length rub against his hole. Tan hands moved to push Sasuke forward, his hole tightening around the first few inches. It made him feel full, there was also some discomfort but it wasn’t something that would kill him. “Nnngh...Sasuke, we are finally one.” Naruto shifted again, taking a moment to take it in.

“You feel really tight, Naru.” Sasuke panted out, moving to nuzzle his neck, waiting for his idiot to adjust before pushing deeper inside. He wasn’t some monster size or anything, maybe slightly on the thicker size but not by much. Once Naruto gave him the go ahead, he began to move in and out slowly, feeling his length rub the silky walls. Their breathing grew laboured, enjoying the feeling of each other's body.

At first it felt odd for the blonde, not bad just like he was really full and had pressure down there but when Sasuke kept moving, it started to feel good. It wasn’t too bad or too good, just good. They both kept shifting, trying to find the right angle where they could both be comfortable. “You can go faster, Sasu.” Naruto assured, pushing the smaller male deeper inside of him, his tan hands squeezing the pale rear.

“Let me know if it hurts, Naru.” Sasuke gave his best friend a worried look before quickening the pace. They both moaned out, a hiss escaping his lips when Naruto bit down on his shoulder “Oi!”

“Sorry, did it hurt too much?” Naruto asked, licking the bite mark, wrapping his legs around the paler body.

“No...I was just surprised.” Sasuke admitted, rubbing their nose against each other, feeling warm lips press against his. The raven could see why there were people who got addicted to sex, he love the feeling of being inside Naruto’s body and the small needy sounds that the blonde would make. When he pressed up against something, Naruto seemed to melt underneath him and cum, almost screaming in pleasure.

“T-There Sasuke...keep touching me there!” Naruto ordered, trying to thrust against the length, moaning loudly as Sasuke kept thrusting and hitting him wherever that was, his fingers moving to wrap around the sheets, a tingling and warm sensation throughout his body. It felt even better when he heard Sasuke moan out quietly. He was surprised when he felt fingers wrap around his throat and squeeze, eyes widening “Sa..Su?” He asked surprised, staring at those onyx eyes which had a glint behind them. The pressure around his neck increased for a moment and then there was a warmth inside of him, the hand squeezing his neck. 

Naruto moved to grab the pale hand, it was an odd sensation feeling a wave of pleasure but also a hint of fear of not being able to breath. He trusted Sasuke and doubted that the raven would honestly try to hurt him. He watched as Sasuke rode out his orgasm, the grip around his neck relaxing and lips crashing against his own.

* * *

The blonde kissed back, holding on to his other half, when their lips separated, the raven was looking at him apologetically. 

“I am sorry Naruto...I lost control toward the end.” He hadn’t meant to start choking the blonde, it was something he felt like he needed to do in order to get his release...and something he was unsure of how to talk to Naruto about.

“It’s fine, I promise I am fine if it had really hurt I would have stopped it...just wondering why is all.” The blonde softly said, running his fingers through raven locks.

“I’d rather not talk about it...if that’s alright with you.” Sasuke softly replied, a pained look on his face for a moment before it was gone.

Naruto was surprised, wondering what was the story behind it but nodded “Yeah...its completely fine by me. I am just glad we were finally able to become one!” The blonde happily said, letting out a soft yawn. 

“Oi, don’t fall asleep, we still need to clean up!” The raven told his best friend, trying to pull away but was kept in place by those strong hands.

“Mmm...just gonna close my eyes for a moment...I really do love you, Sasuke.” Naruto mumbled, within seconds he was fast asleep.

When Naruto woke up the next day, Sasuke was nowhere to be seen, a feeling of dread hitting the blonde. He couldn’t remember everything but he could remember just enough especially with the sticky feeling inside of him and the soreness that let him know what they had been up to last night.

The blonde went to shower and finish cleaning himself up, getting dressed in fresh clothes and taking off the sheets. He told himself that he was overthinking the whole thing, when the door opened and he saw the raven, he grinned, moving to kiss his best friend but was stopped.

“Sasuke?” Naruto asked confused, wondering why those onyx eyes were refusing to look at him.

“I think there’s been a misunderstanding, Naruto.” The raven quietly said.

“Huh?” What was the bastard going on about now?

“I really care about you and our friendship...and I’d hate to lose it but I think I might.” Sasuke started, unable to look at the blonde and looking stressed for a moment “Listen...about last night. You know it meant nothing, right? It was just the two of us drunk and had no special meaning behind it...you know that right?”

Naruto felt like he'd been drowned in cold water, staring at his best friend in shock “....Last night was a mistake?” He slowly asked.

“Well...two guys can’t be together, right? I have to restore my clan and that’s not something you can give me, Naruto...I am sorry.”Sasuke looked rather uncomfortable, moving past the blonde and grabbing his luggage “I need to head back first, sorry.”

Naruto moved to grab his best friend’s wrist, forcing a smile on his face “Of course I know last night was just us being drunk...I was just messing with you...so please….please don’t leave me, Sasuke...please don’t go.”

**_A mistake...that was all he’s been._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So for those that didn't read the scene, this is set after Sasuke went to Orochimaru and came back to them. Naruto tells Sasuke how great he is but Sasuke warns him that all he can do is hurt those he cares about.
> 
> Next chapter is Naruto missing Gaara, also Naruto and Sarada spending some time together at a bookshop.
> 
> Please do let me know what you thought about this chapter, apologies again for the shitty sex scene, the next shitty come is coming soon.


	25. ch25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sarada & Naruto spend some time together at a bookshop. Naruto misses Gaara and tries to not keep doubting their relationship.

Naruto blinked, coming out of his memories of Sasuke and him. Even after that happened they were together a few more time, each time they would blame the alcohol but then the blonde started getting greedy, he kept craving a real relationship instead of just the sex or the affection he’d get like bread crumbs until he snapped at the raven, demanding more. 

The blonde walked out of the spare room as quietly as possible, the ache in his chest getting worse. Sasuke would have been a great father, he would have helped Sarada with her martial arts and taught her all sorts of things. She would have been the light in his eyes, the heir that Sasuke had always craved and more importantly, a blood family.

Gaara...he probably wanted a blood heir as well, someone who would really be family instead of being adopted. Maybe it was because both of them had a family unlike Naruto who grew up an orphan, the blonde would never be able to understand. 

He went to his kitchen, pouring water in the kettle then waited for it to boil. If the redhead really decided that it was over for them, Naruto needed to make sure not to make it difficult, he should feel lucky enough that he got to spend the time he did with the stoic male and they could still be friends, he wouldn’t make things awkward. 

There was no way he could compete with Miss Ao, she was beautiful and talented. **_‘Since when do you give up so easily, Kid? I don’t remember you being such a weakling, tch.’_ **Naruto could almost see the fiery kyuubi growling at him behind a prison which represented the seal that the blonde had tattooed on his stomach. 

_‘I am not giving up...I am just being smart. You saw how it ended with Sasuke, it’s going to be the same thing with Gaara, why would Gaara choose me over Miss Ao?’_ Was he really talking to himself? It seems he’s officially gone crazy.

**_‘I am just hearing excuses right now..well not that it matters to me, you deserve to be alone. If you are going to be such a weak brat I’ll devour you and take over.’_ **Kurama taunted, one of his large claws scratching against the cell, a sadistic grin on his face.

‘ _And I am officially going crazy._ ’ Naruto thought to himself with a sigh, making his coffee, adding five sugar then took a moment to enjoy the honey scent.

**_‘You’ve been crazy for a long time...who else has an imaginary fox caged up in their head and fights with them?’_ **Kurama snickered before seeming to disappear into the cage.

“Fair point.” The blonde answered out loud. He wasn’t a quitter, he couldn’t just give up on Gaara without trying his best and talking to the redhead.

When Sarada woke up, he let her get ready and then drove toward the bookstore. It had the scent of wood and old book which he loved so much. There was also a small cafe attached to it where some people were reading the books they bought while having coffee or tea. 

Sarada had disappeared to the mystery section, searching for her favorite books. Naruto turned toward the thriller section where they had books about past detective cases. Tan fingers caressed each spine cover as cerulean blue eyes searched, deciding to go for a book about some of the most notorious serial killers, then kept searching, remembering the book that Sarada had mentioned. Naruto walked deeper into the store, glancing at the different titles, stopping only to get the set of the book the younger Uchiha had mentioned and he had promised to read. With that in arm, he moved to search for her then stopped, smiling slightly.

He grabbed the book, reading the title **‘Tales of Shukaku & The Nine tail fox.’** It was apparently about some priest called Shukaku who turns out to be an old racoon yokai and a kyuubi who play tricks on some lords by passing as a beautiful woman and as a kettle. Shukaku...that was how Naruto had met Gaara and hadn’t the redhead mentioned some legend of his birth about a priest and a racoon spirit? 

**_Gaara...Gaara...Gaara…_ **

Ah, why did he miss the redhead so much? Why did it feel as if he would get consumed by his desire to see his lover? All he could do was wait for the redhead to come back to him and keep quietly missing him.

Arranged marriage? Naruto wouldn’t give in so easily over such a thing, he would beg, plead and fight so that the redhead would stay by his side. 

Naruto decided to look for Sarada, a warm smile on his face when he saw she was sitting down in the cafe, reading a book with a cup of tea by her side. She had a serious look on her face that made him think of Sasuke but also of Sakura when she got into her zone. That’s right...Sarada was a mixture of the love that the three of them had for each other. She was a combination of a love that Sakura and Sasuke shared which led to Sakura getting pregnant, she was also a mixture of the love and sadness that Sakura and Naruto shared when Sasuke left them.

Ah...would he be able to have his own child someday? There were things like surrogate mothers nowaday, right? It was possible for Gaara and him to have a child with the help of someone else...and they could come to this bookstore together, with Sarada of course, she would be a big sister and Sakura would be an aunt...Sasuke wherever he was, would tease Naruto about being a dad and spoiling the kid too much.

He walked closer until he was standing in front of Sarada “Are you enjoying the books?” He asked her brightly, the despair from earlier seeming to fade for now. Sasuke and him had their time, they shared their story and then it ended, his new story was with Gaara and this time Naruto would not make the same mistake. 

Sarada jumped slightly, looking up at the blonde with wide onyx eyes, glasses sliding off. For a fleeting moment those eyes looked dark red but then it was gone “O-Oh, I am sorry, I ended up sitting down without asking you. The story is just so interesting, we’ve just discovered where the children were and where the needle points came from!” 

“It’s alright, I am glad to see you are enjoying the story. Give me a moment to pay for all of them and then you can go back to reading it, okay?” He grinned down at her, watching her serious face relax and smile back at him. 

They went to the counter together with Naruto paying for the books with his card, using a discount he had as well. Once it was all nicely packed and Sarada had her book, they went back to the cafe, Naruto ordering a black coffee for himself while Sarada had her black tea.

They stayed there quietly for a few hours, just reading and enjoying their presence. He got a text message from Shikamaru which had the pictures he asked for and a video of a very pregnant Temari showing the baby kicking “Gaara will come back to you, he’s just a bit busy taking care of things with the elders right now...just trust him.” Temari had said in the video before turning to look past the camera “And you! Hurry up and take responsibility for what you’ve done to me! Get me sweet chestnuts and I mean **_REAL_ ** sweet chestnuts you lazy bum!”With that, the video ended.

He let out a soft sigh of relief, if even Temari was saying that Gaara would come back to him, there was nothing for him to worry about, right? 

After the bookstore, they went for a walk, he could feel her small hands wrap around his much larger one as Sarada talked more about the story. He had put the bags in his car so that they could walk without worry.

Family...Sarada and Sakura were his family and one day maybe in the not so distant future he would be able to start a family with Gaara as well. If they had a child of their own, would they go on walks like these? Would they talk about books and martial art?

The way that Sarada carries herself is so much like her father, she had so much of Sasuke that it felt as if it would overwhelm Naruto sometimes but also made him adore her even more, she was his last link to the person he had cherished the most in the world. He was glad that she was here or else he might have really broken down before Gaara got the chance to come back. She kept him grounded and gave him strength to keep going.

After their walk, they went back to the car, once home they turned on the Tv and lowered the volume while they sat on the couch, reading one of their new books. Naruto had decided to start reading the book she had recommended, it was interesting, much better than he had thought it would be.

This felt nice, it felt homey and made him feel happy. He had asked Sai for a favor and then sent the money via transfer, wondering if it would be done before Gaara made it back.

  
_‘I miss you...I miss you so much I feel like I’ll suffocate in it...I see you in every bit of space, when did you become so important to me? When did Sasuke and you begin to consume my whole world? Ah...I really do miss you, hurry up and come back to me, Gaara-kun.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Tales of Shukaku & The Nine tail Fox" is a real folkstory and is what Shukaku from Naruto is based off, Kurama's & Shukaku's relationship in Naruto is also based on that story.
> 
> Next chapter, Naruto decides to take up a case from one of his detective friends, he also gets some more bad news that might have send him over the edge. 
> 
> I might not post the next chapters until next week. It depends how many chapters I manage to write this week. Can't believe we are already 25 chapters in!
> 
> As always, please read, leave comments, kudos and bookmarks please. They mean a lot to me.
> 
> Until next time.  
> -Y-


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